Attention Hungry Brockton Christian RapDad Starts Online Witchhunt On The Hub After Accusing Pastor Of Slapping His 5 Year Old Son In Rambling Broken English Rant, This Wouldn’t Be His First Time Using His Kids For Attention Online

Follow and like the Turtleboy Sports Returns, and Clarence Woods Emerson to keep up with the hilarious turtle rider commentary.

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information.

If you like free speech and want to support what we’re doing, feel free to donate to the Turtle fund:

Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship.

Thanks to the internet and the gullible, hysterical people who use it, it has never been easier than it is today to ruin a business, career or reputation over some bullshit than it is today. Now we get to add “place of worship” to that list, too.

This is Vernon Ford, one of the fine, upstanding citizens of the city of Brockton.

Vernon is alleging that his son was hit by a…umm…pastor or something, in God’s house no less. I think. That’s about as much as I could gather from the word diarrhea he splattered all over the Brockton Hub:

What in the Nigerian prince email happen to yo’ baby?

My head was spinning just trying to get through that broken English essay. Of course he posted this to The Brockton Hub, because as is often the case in internet sob stories, the police did nothing to help. They just shrugged and said, “Go on social media.”

Naturally, though, because he wisely chose to go to the Brockton Hub instead of the authorities, people lost their goddamn minds, and all the hardos came out to yell AINT NOBUDDY GON WALK AGAIN IF THEY DO THAT TO MUH BEHBEES

Yeah, totally believable, guys. Let’s drag this Kachi dude through the mud, maybe show up to his house with torches and pitchforks. Because he totally, definitely, without a doubt went slaphappy on a little kid in a church. No doubt. This guy from the Brockton Hub says so, therefore it must be true.

It’s not like he’s ever tried to use his kids for attention before, by like, living vicariously through forcing them to make shitty rap music on the internet or anything.

1. “Yung Tai” sounds like noodles I would order at a shitty strip mall Chinese restaurant drunk at 12am. Pick a better rap name for your little money grab, Dad.
2. The fact that you made your kid make this awful music and posted it to the internet is the real child abuse here.
3. I didn’t believe your story before, now I really don’t.

This guy obviously wants the attention. He wanted a rap “career” but ended up an abjectly poor barely-literate living in Brockton, Massachusetts, because he sucks, just like every other wannabe “MC” that ends up on here. Newsflash Vernon, your kid sucks, too. Why do you want him to get bullied? If this is how you want to raise your kids, fine. Labor Ready will always be looking for help. But then you don’t get to bitch and moan on the Hub whenever they get slapped. Thems the rules, sorry.