Hoodrat Heroes

Auntie Emphysema Celebrates Christmas Woonsocket Style By Threatening To Kick Cops In The Face For Arresting Hoodbooger Husband And Fuckbag Son


There’s Christmas, and then there’s Christmas in Woonsocket.

That’s how you celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ in Rhode Island’s upper asshole.

Let’s go to the play by play.

It begins with Holla Back Horatio being taken to the ground for unknown reasons, when all of a sudden Mikey Mayonnaise starts rolling up his sleeves because he’s decided to jump into the scrum.

He immediately gets throw to the ground by the cops after interfering with a dangerous and volatile situation.

Auntie Emphysema, who appears to be the mother of Mikey Mayonnaise wisely elected to begin yelling, “That’s my fucking kid,” “don’t touch my kid,” and “What did he do,” which almost always leads to the release of the suspect in question. Mikey Mayonnaise wrangled himself free, but the bootleg Wayans Brother continued to resist on the ground. This may be the most Woonsocket screenshot of all time.

Auntie Emphysema wisely yelled, “These crooked ass cops, I’m about to kick in you in the fucking face” and had to be dragged away by her crotch fruit, who for some reason was wearing sandals on Christmas Day, in below freezing temperatures.

Meanwhile Holla Back Horatio was actively resisting arrest while the dick cushion he’s slamming continued to yell “what did he do?”

Meanwhile the Dindu Nuffin mafia was yelling at the cops because it took four of them, while conveniently ignoring that it would only require one cop if Holla Back Horatio would just stop resisting arrest.

Auntie Emphysema continued her All-Star Christmas parenting.

“And they hit junior!! You hit my kid mother fucker!! It’s going DOOOWWWWNNN!!!”

Yes, that should definitely smooth things over. Or so, you would think. Instead Junior ended up in handcuffs….

and Auntie Emphysema was squaring up with the po-po.

Shockingly she didn’t go down quietly either, and sounded like carton of Newport Lights being anally raped by an elephant.

And Christmas would not be compete if Auntie Emphysema also didn’t pick up a charge for resisting arrest, on top of the charge of assault and battery on a cop and interfering with an arrest.

In classic Woonsocket style she wisely elected to show her face in the comments section after cashing in her food stamps and getting bailed out of jail.

Sounds like someone’s gonna be calling Attorney Richard N. Vulva for a free consult tomorrow.

Holla Back Horatio’s real name is Raymond Mcswain, which might be the most ratchet name of all time.

He has a bad habit of driving around Rhode Island without a license.

Nevertheless, the free muh boi patrol was out in full force whining about how the cops had to get a little rough with these chudfucks.

Hey Kevin, the cops threw the “minor” to the ground like trash, because that’s what he is now and always will be in the future – a steaming pile of filthy Woonsocket trash. All they had to do to avoid getting tossed to the ground was put their hands behind their back. Instead they chose to play WWE and they found out the hard way what happens when you do that.

Meanwhile, the cameraman seemed like a real winner too.

You’ll never guess what his big plans are.

You know your rap career is really going places when it requires a $4,000 GoFundMe to get started, and you end up raising $0.

And that, lady’s and gentlemen, is why Santa doesn’t come to Woonsocket.


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83 Comment(s)
  • woonsocket_rocket
    January 2, 2020 at 7:29 am

    Hood booger Ian the rapper looks like some dudes we’d see in Iraq, I bet he’s got a closet of man dresses.

  • Sir Wilfred Death
    December 27, 2019 at 7:16 pm

    There’s a museum (no cracks) in Woonsocket called The Museum of Work and Culture. It traces the history of the once great city of Woonsocket. This city was an industrial powerhouse in which people from all over, including Quebec, worked and prospered. Its decline started after WWI and continues to this day.

    I can’t think that Rome in the dark ages could have had a more precipitous fall from glory than Woonsocket. Ruins of mills and grand architecture are everywhere. It’s so sad.

  • Renfro
    December 27, 2019 at 5:33 pm

    A hideous gay white douchebag with a lawn jockey son and ape husband
    No white man would touch her with a 10 foot pole

    December 27, 2019 at 9:16 am

    This bring’ a whole new meaning and joy too the old saying “Christmas in the Clink” hahahahahaha what a bunch of utter useless trash pigs!

    The best part of the blog is when the the camera man posted “I cant name another negro hotter than me” what a fag!

  • hartf811
    Hamsho noshow
    December 27, 2019 at 6:59 am

    White women with black guys = lowlifes. Simple fack

    • NoShit
      December 27, 2019 at 7:52 am

      Multiple lame comments = loser. Fact

      • hartf811
        General Robert E.
        December 27, 2019 at 9:09 am

        ….says the lowlife hoodbooger. fact.

  • hartf811
    Hamsho noshow
    December 27, 2019 at 6:56 am

    Mix race = lowlifes. Simple fack

  • Johnnie AirMaxes
    December 27, 2019 at 5:40 am

    Correct me if I’m wrong, Didn’t Castro send over thousands of violent felon criminal fucks From Cuba at one point? Like that movie Scarface? I’m convinced that the population of Lynn, Chelsea, Fall River and every other slum fuck shithole that’s filled with these Chicago bull Attire wearing chicanos is that generations offspring. Just food for thought. Thanks.

    • hartf811
      Aristotle Onassis
      December 27, 2019 at 9:28 am

      Yes he did. In 1981 it was called the Mariel Boat Lift and was the undercurrent to the movie Scarface. However Cuban criminals was not our problem in MA>. Massholeachusettes is the result of Teddy (my liver is as big as a Chivas bottle) Kennedy sponsoring legislation, The Hart-Cellar Act, supposedly to allow immigration from Eastern European and Asian countries.
      Instead the Caribbean, most dominantly the DR {due to the French screwing over Haiti financially} and Latin America encamped en masse to a layabout lifestyle fueled by LBJ’s “War on Poverty” redistribution of wealth; WELFARE (to assist our native layabouts; Blacks “sorry Bojangles on reparations; we already gave at the office!).
      Thus America imported more poverty into the gumbo pot we were already diving into debt to minimize. The recipe of 2 bodies of brown and black, plus free money, shake well, resulted in more feral brown babies that continue to breed like mice. And that Virginia, is where Lawrence, Lowell, Lynn, Springfield, New Bedford, Fall River and every other 3rd world city in Mass comes from. Where nobody works and nobody knows who there father is.

  • Bucketboys Dentist and Nutrionalist
    December 27, 2019 at 2:57 am

    The dregs of society.

  • Silencio Dogood
    December 27, 2019 at 1:55 am

    i order my coffee mulatto, and it appears that the white trash melting pot is stirred black these days, making SJWs in lily-white white enclaves sing Kumbaya during their Kwanzaa celebrations.

    McSwains? Taser them all.

  • Walter "Drippy" Bird
    December 27, 2019 at 12:07 am

    If Obama had a son…………..

  • Rumple Foreskin
    December 26, 2019 at 9:21 pm

    I bet she can take the HOLE thing on camera, if you catch my drift…

    And that cameraman is a giant piece of pube-covered shit, while we’re on the topic.

  • Natasha
    December 26, 2019 at 9:17 pm

    The noise that chick was making just made my dog start uncontrollably barking and running around the house lol

  • street sweeper
    December 26, 2019 at 9:07 pm

    Takes about 3 seconds to subdue a perp like this if you don’t worry about lawsuits and investigations, fuck em.

    We need a paramilitary group to go in first and soften up the perps it would save the cops some time.

  • Johnnie AirMaxes
    December 26, 2019 at 8:12 pm

    Idk what part was funnier. The part where that Malboro Light smelling megladon had her face smushed up against the wall getting handcuffed or the part where the GOAT started a $4,000 go fund me to chase his dreams! I’m fucking dead! You can’t make this shit up!! Absolute losers!!!!

  • BitchTits
    December 26, 2019 at 7:52 pm

    Burn the coal, pay the toll.

    • Thank you....help yourself to more
      December 27, 2019 at 1:49 am

      I personally thank every black man out there for taking care of this woman’s “needs”…… i encourage them to find more white women of this statue and give them everything they need

  • Couch Fart
    December 26, 2019 at 7:49 pm

    No flames

    Obviously this group is not Harvard bound but the cops refused to answer what did the guy do ….i need to know more if hr did something cops actions legit if he’s being harassed cops not good

    Pro tip for you not all cops are good

    • You’re a Genius
      December 26, 2019 at 7:59 pm

      So the cops go around looking for people to fuck with? You’re as much of an idiot as these scumbags at the gas station. People like you who think they’re sly are the ones voting the politicians into office that are ruining our country.

    • Joe D'cahguy
      December 26, 2019 at 8:14 pm

      So… the cops are supposed to get into a conversation with a screaming lunatic while they’re trying to subdue an idiot resisting arrest? How do you picture that conversation going?

    • Randall C
      December 26, 2019 at 10:25 pm

      Couch the cops don’t have to answer to a slimy piece of shit like you
      Or the filthy shitbags they arrested you ignorant cocksucker
      It’s all in the arrest report dum dum

  • whatevuh
    December 26, 2019 at 6:57 pm

    and they wonder why we all hate them? savages

  • Gas station blues
    December 26, 2019 at 6:36 pm

    Those officers are very daring, in that they’re not wearing gloves, masks, or hazmat suits. For their own sake, I hope they took showers immediately afterward.

    Otherwise, you have to wonder what started all of this. Refusal to allow use of the restroom? A stolen bag of chips? Someone wanted to be on teevee that night?

  • Idgaf
    December 26, 2019 at 5:27 pm

    Bunch of scum bags . But it was not below freezing temps on Xmas eve or Xmas day. Not even today . So don’t over exaggerate. All New englanders wear shorts and flip flops until a snow storm . Smh. But these are scum bags

  • Snow Man
    December 26, 2019 at 5:15 pm

    Her husband taught her good, note the ‘didn’t do nuffin’ screams at the end. Merry Christmas ya filthy animals

    • Silencio Dogood
      December 27, 2019 at 1:59 am

      Nice reference at the end!

  • Judge dread
    December 26, 2019 at 5:11 pm

    If an officer places u under arrest, you u put ur hands out and go to jail. Save the battle for a court room. You have a right to a trial and defense.

    Unfortunately these dick bags want to take it out on he streets. You went from one charge to maybe 5. Congrats douche canoes.

    • Judge dread
      December 26, 2019 at 5:14 pm

      I was talking about a reasonable person.

  • Calm WhiteDad
    December 26, 2019 at 5:03 pm

    These cops took it way too easy on her. Just watching it, I wanted to grab her neck and slam her to the ground.

    Kudos to the cops for restraining themselves when they didn’t need to. I’d imagine the cops were also a bit pissy because they had to work Christmas, too.

    Very impressive.

  • Real_Finn
    December 26, 2019 at 4:44 pm

    I like the part where they hit the pavement. I only wish concrete was a harder substance and they lost any remaining teeth.

    Get Fucked,

    • murdochpatsymcreynolds
      December 26, 2019 at 8:52 pm

      Mx Finn, that is quite an amusing anecdote, but we don’t actually believe you would wish harm on the McSwain family.

  • Ray Patriarca
    Chuck Schumer's big nose
    December 26, 2019 at 3:56 pm

    Too bad the cop didn’t rap that big mouthed cunt right in the chicklets with a flashlight.

    • Renfro
      December 26, 2019 at 10:32 pm

      I like that
      That’s exactly what Schumer is a big hook nosed sleazy newyork Jew cocksucker with a bulldyke daughter

  • Jon Tudor
    December 26, 2019 at 3:30 pm

    Minor? ….dude was born in 1990!

  • Not to be outdone....
    December 26, 2019 at 3:01 pm

    Amanda Sawyer…Its your move..

  • Orion
    December 26, 2019 at 2:38 pm

    Fourth picture down. The look on that motherfuckers’ face tells you that’s FAR from his first rodeo and that he doesn’t give a fuck about obeying laws. The system has always been there to cater to him and people like him.

  • Shane Hoban
    December 26, 2019 at 2:24 pm

    I like twerking my ass for ex cons who recently were released.
    Quincy Reprezent!

  • B Gill
    December 26, 2019 at 2:14 pm

    This is quite possibly your best work yet.


    What a family of Dipshits.

  • SkankHunt42
    December 26, 2019 at 1:58 pm

    She is nasty.Seen better mouths with hooks through them.

  • dr. fill
    December 26, 2019 at 1:51 pm

    I despise poor people. And negroes.

  • Full Metal Ratchet
    December 26, 2019 at 1:51 pm

    Gunna ohpin me’z ahh babbah shop.

  • Deval Patricks Scrotum
    December 26, 2019 at 1:46 pm

    If Barry had a son….

  • Fuck Pig
    December 26, 2019 at 1:42 pm

    I wish the cops had crushed that fucking cunt’s skull and splattered her fucking brains all over the fucking pavement. First, there are humans….then, there are animals…then, there is dog shit….the fucking, motherfucking, cock-sucking, knuckle-dragging, welfare-collecting, utterly-fucking–worthless-to-society, total-motherfucking-waste-of-oxygen, PARASITES featured in the video and in this article are below motherfucking dog shit.

    • Blue Lives Matter
      December 26, 2019 at 10:53 pm

      Make them beg for their life first. Force them to their knees. Then eight in the back of the head at point blank range. Execution style. Then maybe a few more rounds to the head for good measure. Shoot until you see brain matter. Then maybe a good old fashioned fecal voiding on the dead body. Bowel movements… smear em in!

      Bottom line: it should be legal for cops to kill whoever they want wherever they want however they want.

      • What did your mom and I tell you....
        December 27, 2019 at 12:27 am

        ….about electronics after lights out?

  • Angry white man
    December 26, 2019 at 1:16 pm

    Too many cameras,years ago she would of gotten a billie club across her forehead.

  • Vigil Ante
    Vigil Ante
    December 26, 2019 at 1:10 pm

    Not one mention of that sweet Woonsocket formalwear champion outfit in the frame for most of the video? Where was that rachimal all dressed up to the nines to go? I assume some sort of gun violence victim memorial.

  • Spic Tormentor
    December 26, 2019 at 1:01 pm

    Some days I wish I became a cop so I could body slam minorities

    • BFF
      December 26, 2019 at 1:58 pm

      And you’d still get your sorry ass handed to you. All talk and no action. Tough guy from the basement.

      • Spic Tormentor
        December 26, 2019 at 2:18 pm

        Let me know what corner you’re selling stolen aèropostal gift cards at and I will come slap the malta goya out of your mouth.

  • bill fleming
    December 26, 2019 at 1:00 pm

    If this happened in Boston the cops would be charged with winning the fight which is a hate crime per Rachael Rollins

  • murdochpatsymcreynolds
    December 26, 2019 at 12:52 pm

    It’s so heart warming to see the whole family celebrating the holiday together!

    • capone181
      December 26, 2019 at 1:09 pm

      Yes even if it was in a padded cell.

  • Bill Clinton
    December 26, 2019 at 12:42 pm

    Cop should have made her deep throat the gas nozzle and then with a good groan, pumped a load down her throat.

  • Big fan
    December 26, 2019 at 12:42 pm

    First story in 3 days.
    Stolen vid.
    Lame commentary.
    Begging for money at the end.
    Where’s the next installment on the vape guy’s history of Facebook posting?

    • Bigger Fan
      December 26, 2019 at 12:53 pm

      Hey big fan! Isn’t TB allowed to celebrate the holiday with family? “First story in 3 days?“
      Sorry you had nothing better to do over the holidays.

    • Big loser
      December 26, 2019 at 2:59 pm

      What a vapid existence if you sat by the computer waiting for an update over the holidays.

      Next time there is a lull, go out and buy a flat brimmed Bulls hat, put it on and then go do something stupid.

  • Ungawah
    December 26, 2019 at 12:28 pm

    Street apes in their natural habitat. Nothing to see here, unless you want to watch the Zookeeper’s round up the escaped Apes.

  • Ghost Cowboy
    December 26, 2019 at 12:24 pm

    Ghost Cowboy explored the river bank as the deputies taught the younger how to comply in the ways of the townsfolk. He was told of the prejudice to expect back east. Not that the settler hadn’t already known bigotry, for the natives didn’t treat him much different than his own people would. Why do people do that he pondered as he sat down with his cane pole to fish for supper. Hate. But the evil doers have always hated the badged authority. Much like they hated their fathers. Unknown or not. Ride away.

    • Will post comments for food
      December 26, 2019 at 2:55 pm

      Go play in traffic

  • Judge dread
    December 26, 2019 at 12:21 pm

    Ratchet Xmas gathering:

    Let’s go out on Xmas and commit A&B on cops, resist arrest, scream like we’re a victim, and spend the night in lock up.

    The judge used to say this a lot but I haven’t recently; we need to bring back the stocks in the town square; horse whipping; tar and feathering.

    I guess TBS is the modern day tar and feathering and I agree a good metaphysical /internet beat down is good.

    But no one forgets a good physical ass kicking.

  • Captain Trips
    Booker T Washington Jr
    December 26, 2019 at 12:21 pm

    Another unhealthy fatty who had to go mudshark so she wouldn’t be completely alone for at least a short time, or least until she gets herpes or gets pregnant, then they’se be “slidin on down the road honkey!”

  • Captain Trips
    Donald Trump
    December 26, 2019 at 12:14 pm

    “They are not sending us their best” – Donald J. Trump

    • Disappointed taxpayer
      December 26, 2019 at 2:10 pm

      Any way we can extent that wall to completely surround the Great State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations? Oh, also most of SE Massachusetts too please. Thank you Mr. President!

  • Interesting
    December 26, 2019 at 12:13 pm

    Love how Uncle Turtleboy is always whining about other outlets “stealing” his story’s, but has sloppily uploaded some guy named Jim Williams’s video to the Turtleboy YouTube without linking or crediting him.

    • Spic Tormentor
      December 26, 2019 at 1:53 pm

      This Jim Williams guys sounds like some type of faggot.

      Don’t you agree, Jim?

  • Renfro
    December 26, 2019 at 12:09 pm

    Interracial families are always a problem

  • ChipChipperson
    December 26, 2019 at 11:49 am

    I was the arresting officer. We charged Mrs McSwain’s face with interfering with a sidewalk.

    • Vigil Ante
      Vigil Ante
      December 26, 2019 at 1:14 pm

      Lyle, Was that your mudder and Lamar?

      • ChipChipperson
        December 26, 2019 at 11:27 pm

        Naw my muddahs not fat she’s just a very rubenesque woman

  • Ray Patriarca
    Old Gumshoe
    December 26, 2019 at 11:48 am

    These cops played waaaaaay to nice, for waaaaaay too long. That’s how cops get hurt.
    But in today’s climate, unfortunately that’s how the game is played. Every asshole and his brother has a cellphone camera. Every asshole is a shit-house lawyer.
    It’s too bad the cop didn’t drop her on her big fucking mouth.
    “What did I do ?” She exclaimed.
    Fuck her.
    Fuck him.
    And fuck the asshole commentors on the vid .
    God, I’m glad I’m retired !

    • Judge dread
      December 26, 2019 at 12:31 pm

      Right on man. The judge has several friends that are LEO’s in NYC and MA. They all tell me the same thing, always assume your being recorded.

  • Alan Bohdiewicz
    AJ Alphonse
    December 26, 2019 at 11:45 am

    Merry xmas to the GROUND!

  • Judge dread
    December 26, 2019 at 11:43 am

    Auntie only threw down and did A&B on a cop cuz her Newport light stash was potentially compromised.

  • capone181
    Lee Ho
    December 26, 2019 at 11:37 am

    The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

    • Jim Lahey
      December 26, 2019 at 11:47 am

      The shit apple falls from he shit tree and grows in a field of shit.

      • Randy
        December 26, 2019 at 1:58 pm

        You are so smart Mr. Lahey. Lets go get some cheeseburgers…..

        • Jim Lahey
          December 26, 2019 at 2:49 pm

          As long as they aren’t store bought. Randy I have to let he liquor do the thinking.

      • Randy
        December 26, 2019 at 7:26 pm

        Then all you’re left with is shit apple sauce and shit cider.

  • Latin Queen Faggots
    December 26, 2019 at 11:37 am

    “KingLito the Goat” aka another Latin King… you guys really need to do a story on them in this area and all the “legitimate” businesses they have infiltrated into… start with “el oso security” and henry “king” oso. Thay always have king in their name or use lions in their logos too, not hard to find lol.

    • Judge dread
      December 26, 2019 at 11:50 am

      I agree- start with nail salons and laundromats. Money laundering 101.

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