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There have been thousands of idiots protesting Ferguson and Eric Garner but I recently came across by far the most insane of all these nudniks. Her name is Khadijah Lynch
and she is a Brandeis University student who basically took a steamy Khadijah dump all over the NYPD the day that two NYPD cops were killed in Brooklyn. But because we’re apparently living in the bizarro world she’s being treated like a hero (she even has her own hashtag), and the student who called her out on it – Daniel Mael – is being treated like the bad guy.
It all started when my girl Khadijah tweeted out this gem:
“i have no sympathy for the nypd officers who were murdered today.”
“lmao, all i just really dont have sympathy for the cops who were shot. i hate this racist f…ing country.”
“the fact that black people have not burned this country down is beyond me”
“I am in riot mode. Fuck this fucking country”
Obviously this girl is the biggest piece of shit you’ve ever heard of. Obviously. But at the time she was the undergraduate representative in the Brandeis African and Afro-American studies department. Ya got that? She wasn’t just a normal student – she was a leader!!
That’s where a conservative student named Jeff Mael came into the picture. He posted her tweets on a site he runs and she was quickly anointed the biggest asshole in the history of the internet. Now most normal people would look at this and say, “that’s what you get for posting dumb shit on Twitter.” But not at Brandeis. After all, this was a school that made Turtleboy’s naughty list this year when they banned a world famous battered woman (Hirsi Ali) from being their graduation speaker because she was critical of Islam for mutilating her genitals.
Nope, at Brandeis Khadijah became the victim and Mael became the evil white guy. Some idiot named Michael Piccione, who serves on the Student Board of Conduct, wrote a letter to the faculty and students and said, “Mael has exposed Khadijah to the largely white supremacist following of the website.” He said that it was Mael, and not my girl Khadijah, who had violated the student conduct policy, for “stalking.”
Then there’s my favorite part of the email:
“Khadijah specifically requested that her personal comments be removed from the website and the article in question taken down, but her wishes were ignored,”
Piccione also said that Lynch’s heartwarming revolutionary tweets were her “own personal opinion” and that she does not want her tweets “publicized in any form and if you do not abide by my wishes I constitute your disregard as slander.”
It wasn’t just students getting Khadisha’s back and shitting on Mael either. Some nitwit professor issued a letter basically calling her a hero while saying that responses to Khadijah Lynch should be condemned with even greater passion.” Because obviously criticizing someone who is celebrating the deaths of two innocent police officers is a million times worse than celebrating the deaths of two innocent police officers. Even ask Professor Sonya Conner.
It also just so happens that Jeff Mael is Jewish and an outspoken supporter of Israel. So naturally everyone at Brandeis (named after America’s first Jewish Supreme Court Justice) thinks he’s the devil. Because in America it’s OK to shit on Jews because Israel is a big bad bully and Hamas are the friendly neighbors that just wanna be friends.
Everything about this is insane. First you have Khadija Lynch. Hey girl, if you hate America so much you are more than welcome to leave and never come back. You won’t be missed in the least bit. There’s a reason that “black people haven’t burned this country down.” And that reason is because America is fucking awesome. Why burn down a country that gives you the opportunity to pursue whatever career you want, practice whatever religion you want, and block traffic at Lincoln Square whenever you’re mad?
Also, black people are not all the same person. Please stop suggesting that just because someone is born with black skin that they automatically view the world in the same angry way that you do. Some people just live life and are happy. Black people too. There’s even black cops!! Mind blown!!
And then there’s the idiot who wrote the email whining about her “own private opinions.” I don’t know how many times I have to say this until people get this very simple concept – THE INTERNET IS NOT YOUR FUCKING DIARY!! Once you write something on Twitter it no longer belongs to you. It belongs to EVERYONE. Ya got that? There’s no such thing as “stalking” on the Internet. If I can read what you wrote with a click of the the mouse that’s not stalking. Stalking involves getting dressed up in disguise and sitting outside of your ex-girlfriend’s house for hours. All Jeff Mael did is sit on his couch and go on Twitter.
If Khadijah didn’t want to be publicly lambasted as the ultimate radical dooshnozzle, then she probably should’ve kept her idiotic, hateful statements to herself. But she didn’t. Now she has to deal with Internet blowback. Welcome to reality.
My favorite part is when she said, “I constitute your disregard as slander” if Mael didn’t take down her tweets. Oh snap!! An undergraduate student of zero significance has arbitrarily decided that re-posting a Tweet that SHE WROTE, is slander!! Sounds pretty legit. I think this is hilarious simply because I’ve been on the receiving end of these imaginary lawsuits from imaginary legal experts hundreds of times since we started Turtleboy Sports. I’m still waiting for my first summons.
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