If you haven’t been watching HBO’s Hard Knocks this season then you’re missing out. It’s by far the best season I’ve seen so far. The Atlanta Falcons are an intriguing team. They’ve got a quarterback who has the physical tools to win a Super Bowl. They have perhaps the best receiving corps in the NFL. They have Worcester’s own, Doherty high school graduate Yawin Smallwood competing with a bunch of other rookie linebackers for a roster spot.
But most importantly former Patriots linebacker and Super Bowl champion Bryan Cox is the defensive line coach for this team. And he is literally stealing the show. You might never see someone who is made for HBO more than Cox. Where he comes up with these one liners I don’t know. But they’re always fantastic. Last night he was at his finest. For whatever reason he decided to show pictures of his family, including his son that plays for Florida, and his 30 year old daughter. The team was surprised he had a daughter that old since he’s 46 years old. His response was priceless:
So, I don’t really understand the point of him showing his family pictures in a team meeting, but I’m glad he did. Is anyone surprised that Bryan Cox is 46 years old and has a 30 year old daughter? Nope. The guy has been fucking since he was 10. Nothing about that surprises me at all. Bryan Cox exudes confidence and masculinity like none other. What 15 year old girl could resist a 10 year old Cox? Show me that girl. Also as a white guy I didn’t understand the “black Moses” reference, but I laughed out loud anyway because I wanted to feel like I belonged.
Oh yea, and the receiving trio of Julio Jones, Roddy White, and Harry Douglas went bowling together, and it was great television. I can’t believe how good these guys are, especially Douglas, who is my new hero for the way he bowls:
Sometimes I wish I was a black guy. It looks like a lot of fun. Is that racist? Because I’m sorry me and my friends never laugh that much because we’re boring and white. Either way, I want Harry Douglas to teach me how to do that. I’m not bad at bowling, but I hit 130 on a good string. Did you see those scores? Douglas bowled a 188 and lost to Julio. Roddy bowled a 146 and got facialized. Is Hard Knocks just trying to rub it in my face that NFL players are better than me at everything? Football, bowling, and reproducing? If so, they are succeeding and I feel like less of a man.
The only thing I wanna see more of is more Yawin in my life. He’s been in a couple scenes as a background guy. Never talks. But they follow around three other rookie linebackers (Tyler Starr, Prince Shembo, Jacques Smith) because they’re intriguing individuals. Starr is a 7th round pick like Yawin, but he’s the token white linebacker with long flowing hair and a hot baby momma. Shembo is your well-spoken Notre Dame graduate who spends his free time watching tape and talking to the veterans. Smith is the undrafted asshole that loves to fight veterans in practice. Yawin needs to establish an identity post haste or he’s gonna find his ass in Oakland.
Feel free to share your thoughts to keep the conversation going.