Does this look like a cop to you?
Well, according to this deep fried gravy dumpster she is in fact a Revere cop, and used her alleged service as a way to excuse the fact that her fat ass was parked in a handicapped spot in Haverhill.
Easily the best part of the video was when she busted these out:
Because, OF COURSE she rips Newport Lights like it’s going out of style. And of course she parked in a handicapped spot because she’s deftly afraid of walking 10 more feet to purchase them.
Her logic was rock solid though.
Why is it bothering you so much? Are you disabled?
“If your fath-uh were heeeya I’d move in a haahhtbeat”
Right. Because the only people who think it’s shitty for somewhat able bodied people like this to park in handicapped spots are people who aren’t disabled.
Gonna need a fact check on this one though:
“I’m a Reveeeyah police awwwficah”
Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure this sea cow has spent many a day tanning her fupa on Revere Beach, but that doesn’t actually make you a Revere cop. I just have a hard time picturing this cheesesteak chimney doing anything physical, never mind going through a police academy.
“I do not have to give you my badge numbahh.”
Where are the First Amendment auditors when you need them?
Then out of nowhere the guy in the hoverboard shows up to try to get the cameraman to stop blocking her from leaving.
Because nothing screams, “I have authority” quite like a grown man showing up on a battery powered, multi-colored hover board.
The most confusing part about the video was the license plate.
There’s nothing New York about this chick. She reeks of Revere, and she’s probably only up in Haverhill now because she thinks the menthol ban already went into effect, which is why she ended up near the New Hampshire border.
Anyway, she said her name is Christina. I’d love to know more about her service as a Revere police officer if any turtle riders recognize her, or if someone wants to run those plates. Hit me up on Facebook at Clarence Woods Emerson or email me at [email protected]
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