Yesterday we published a blog about some cheesesteak chimney who got caught parking in a Haverhill handicapped spot while trying to buy Newports, and then attempted to badge her way out of it by claiming to be a Reveyahhhh cop.
We wanted to know her name to see if a cop was really using their badge to validate parking in handicapped spots, and a lot of people did send us her name – Cristina Ciampi. Turns out she’s not a cop, but she may have boinked one or two along the way.
She also made it a lot easier by showing up on the Turtle Boy Sports Forever Facebook page and commenting instead.
The blog is a lie because she’s from East Boston and not Revere, even though East Boston is just Revere with an airport. But I notice she didn’t deny parking in the handicapped spot illegally, nor did she deny that she wasn’t a cop. So was that a lie?
Oh I see. It’s a lie because she was only illegally parked in a handicapped spot for two minutes while she ran inside to buy Newports.
She finally admitted that this was in fact wrong, but didn’t address why she lied about being a cop and blamed the guy recording her for blocking her in, thus preventing her escape from public humiliation. She also vowed deformation lawsuits.
Better call Attorney Richard N. Vulva!!
Then she message the TBS Forever page and Clarence Woods Emerson to try to smooth things over.
Pro tip – things usually go a lot smoother when you don’t threaten deformation lawsuits and make up excuses for your ratchet behavior. I don’t care if you’re a “hard working single Mom.” That’s not an excuse to pretend to be a cop and park in handicapped spots.
Also, don’t come at me with the “you’re gonna make me suicide” bullshit.
I immediately lose any sympathy I had for you when you do that. You’re also not admitting your wrongs if you’re making excuses for them.
She also messaged the TBS Forever page with proof that she’s not a ratchet.
Oh look, a selfie with a SnapChat filter. Case closed. Not guilty.
Oh, and don’t brag about how you “know a lot of high people in Revere” and tell us to “ask about you” if you’re looking for sympathy.
She’s apparently a PCA, so she should know better than to park in handicapped spots. Also, if you’re trying to lose 25 pounds, maybe parking a little further away from the door might help.
Or just not eating donuts.
As always, the door is open if Cristina wants to come on the live show tomorrow night and try to explain herself.
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