Hoodrat Heroes

Crotch Critters Sneak Phone Into Jail, Do Hour Long Facebook Live Show With Over A Million Views, Make Lady Folk Moist, Ends When CO Realizes His Jail Is FB Famous 


I was at work today and someone sent me a link to a Facebook live stream of some crotch critters who snuck a phone into jail. The whole thing lasted an hour and 15 minutes and I couldn’t stop watching it.

It had over a million views and ended when the CO’s must’ve gotten wind of it because they burst into the cell and all you saw was a mattress before it faded to black as one of them attempted to hide it. This was the prisoner hosting the show:

Unfortunately when I went to blog it the whole thing was down. But this dude’s Facebook page had been posting from jail for weeks. I’m guessing he’s gonna keep it back up so keep an eye out for him because it’s honestly the best Facebook Live show I’ve ever seen. And I’m not gonna lie, jail kind of looks like fun. As long as I was allowed to say the n word and these guys took me in as their adopted white boy. Let let me tell you – dem hoes were twiddling their lady bits to this stream like it was going out of style.

The fat bastard in the background was eating Goddamn takeout food.

That’s better than what I had for dinner tonight!

Granted it was a sausage fest, and every time the door opened it was yet another dude.

But as you can see, these guys are gonna be rolling in ghetto poontang the moment they get out. I have no idea what state it was in, but based on their accents and the people commenting on other posts it looks like Ohio or Pennsylvania or Georgia or something like that. Obviously this blog would be a lot better with the video, but it was bound to come down after they cracked the million view mark. I’m guessing it will be back up in the not so distant future at which time we will update the blog with a link. All I’m saying is, jail looks way more fun than life at my house.

P.S. If you’re in jail and you get your hands on a cell phone with a data plan, how do you choose Facebook Live over porn? Imagine life without Internet porn AND women? And then imagine you had a chance to get one of those back but you chose to do Facebook Live instead. Guess decisions like that explain why they’re in jail in the first place.


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18 Comment(s)
  • Me
    May 9, 2019 at 12:36 am

    South Caroline this happened. Google “Inamates caught on Facebook Live”

  • nono
    May 8, 2019 at 11:47 pm

    “but based on their accents and the people commenting on other posts it looks like Ohio or Pennsylvania or Georgia or something like that.”

    Which of these is not like the other:
    GEORGIA ?!?!

  • nono
    May 8, 2019 at 11:45 pm

    1. What’s up with the bucket hats? Is it the jail version of Bull’s hats? It is like “Gilligan’s Incarcerated Island.”
    2. Aren’t those a potential safety (hanging) hazard? Oh wait – perps are smuggling phones in and doing FB Live, so I am guessing that’s just another issue on the jail’s “to-do” list.

  • J
    May 8, 2019 at 6:21 pm

    Looks like they are serving hard time….or….just hangin’ with da homies….

  • DeQuan Narcan Theaibibiluss
    May 8, 2019 at 6:20 pm

    smuggle some pure fentanyl into the prison problems solved

  • Well, No Shit
    May 8, 2019 at 4:06 pm

    What kind of shitty culture glorifies being incarcerated? These thirsty bitches talking about fucking these punks once they get out is absolutely mind-blowing.

    These skags will wind up getting knocked up by the ex-cons, and, once they violate parole and are put back in their cells, the cycle of fatherless children will continue.

    Way to be the stereotype, dumbasses.

  • don
    May 8, 2019 at 11:45 am

    why is it every one of them look like ja rule? do they all share a braincell and a gene?

  • Mom's Basement
    May 8, 2019 at 11:16 am

    If they live-streamed an mma elimination style tournament I’d be ok with granting the winner a pardon.

  • Idgaf
    May 8, 2019 at 11:02 am

    There’s this dude in Georgia that randomly hit me up a few weeks ago in jail asking me for pics and canteen money. I asked the dude why he inboxed me not knowing me . He said because I posted a comment about donating clothes and lightly used furniture on someone’s post. So he assumed I would help him out while he in jail. Then I asked him how the fuck he get a phone in jail. He apparently did a favor for a ceo! The whole system is corrupted! So while us tax payers bust our asses these pukes are enjoying life . Smh

    • Bernie M
      May 8, 2019 at 11:19 am

      I take it that he must have been in one of those white collar country club type prisons. Unless you meant co in which case he’s still picking hair out his teeth.

  • Hey, Hey were the monkeys
    May 8, 2019 at 9:57 am

    Reminds me of the Barrel of Monkeys I had as a kid.

  • Captain Trips
    Captain Trips
    May 8, 2019 at 9:50 am

    Get the video set up, put all of em in that cell, throw a cyanide gas grenade in, then close and lock the door. So much tax money saved for the cost of one cyanide gas grenade. Not to mention a enjoyable video!

    • The Practical Guide to Inexpensive Group Executions
      May 10, 2019 at 1:54 am

      A cyanide gas grenade? Be real.
      Toss in a CS grenade or a good blast from a pepper spray fogger to clamp their eyes shut and get the coughing started, then splash a good amount of bleach and then ammonia on the floor.
      See, that liquid mix makes chlorine gas and it’s a killer in concentration.

  • Monkey See...
    May 8, 2019 at 9:32 am

    The monkeys in the cage don’t need internet porn. They bang each other in there constantly.

  • Sick of these Ratchet Fucks
    May 8, 2019 at 6:14 am

    Motha white guy in the bunch. This is better than a day at the zoo. Like going to the old Benson’s Wild Animal Farm and staring at the spitting Gorilla for an hour. Throw em a banana and they entertain all day! Fucking Jigaboos

  • No thugs for this chic
    May 7, 2019 at 11:36 pm

    My older sister went through a gangsta loving stage and her guy would send her polaroid pictures of him posing in normal looking clothes like he thought he was at the club on a Fri night. So sad

  • Ray Patriarca
    Primates in their habitat
    May 7, 2019 at 11:11 pm

    Better than going to the zoo !
    Now I can go to the internet and watch monkeys in their cages !
    Isn’t technology wonderful?
    Gosh, I’m so lucky !

  • Ratchet Rollins D.A.
    May 7, 2019 at 9:41 pm

    Free my boi. You bet I will.
    I will release my violent thug bruthaz to the streets. Dis is da diversity that im talkin bout and its only gonna get worse as the invasion at the border continues. Evil white man works 3 jobs to support all my sons. Whitey aint reproducing and we are. Can anyone say baby momma. Csn anyone say hoodrat. Csn I get a what what can I get a woo woo.

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