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I like Curt Schilling. Always have. I like what he stood for as a baseball player. A bad ass who wants the ball in the biggest moment and always delivers. It’s a joke that he’s not in the Hall of Fame already. I liked what he stood for off the field too. Politics aside (he’s a diehard Republican), the man speaks how he feels. That’s what we’re all about at Turtleboy Sports. Just let it all out and anyone who doesn’t like it can lick my turtle hole. But the man clearly doesn’t understand how the Internet works, which was displayed a couple days back when he started a shitstorm on Twitter by congratulating his daughter for getting a softball scholarship to Salve Regina:
Here’s the thing though. Schilling has over 100K followers. He’s a celebrity who’s made (and lost) millions upon millions of dollars. When you’re a public figure like that you don’t EVER bring up your attractive blonde 18 year old daughter on social media. Christ, write your friends and family an email or something. Naturally boys started saying dumb shit:
But instead of just ignoring it Curt had to go all captain badass on these Internet trolls:
Freaking old people man. Stay off the Internet. That’s not how this works Curt. That’s not how ANY OF THIS WORKS!!
You’re Curt Schilling – 3 time World Series Champion. Future Hall of Famer. You’re not on the same level as these people. Like if I tweeted something fucked up at you, I would fully expect to never hear from you because I should be irrelevant in your world (for now). Even I understand that. I have my own trolls too. Tons of em. Losers like James Kriger. 99 times out of 100 I don’t write back because that would be me admitting that we’re even close to being on the same level. We’re not. The only time you should ever even acknowledge they exist is when you’re giving them the Marshawn Lynch treatment:
I don’t have any sons, and quite frankly if I did I’d be a lot more worried about them than I am about her. Boys are insane. They’re nothing but walking bad decisions. If you raise your daughter right you have nothing to worry about. But you can raise your son right and there’s a good chance he’ll pretty much do anything if you feed him 15 Keystone Lights.
And I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again when it comes to this whole “Daddy’s little girl” crap too – stop being a hypocrite. You’re a professional ball player. You’ve obviously woken up to thousands of women who don’t love you. Not once did you ever think to yourself, “I wonder if this will make her Dad angry?”
Look, I have a Turtle princess myself. Innocent and sweet as hell. But I’m realistic about it. I see infants her age and I can’t help but think – that kid’s gonna try to plow my daughter in 15 years. Especially if she goes to state school. It’s science. Do I get mad? Nope. You just close your eyes and never think about it. Whatever you do don’t get all gangster on them.
Well, Curt wasn’t done yet. He published a blog about it today and went into even more detail about some nastier tweets he’s gotten:
Curt, that kid is fat and he works for a college radio station. That’s like the ideal recipe for never getting laid. Ever. Who gives a flying fuck what some fat bastard said on the Internet? Your daughter is hot. You don’t need to threaten that guy to keep him away. He does that on his own naturally.
Yea we get it Curt. People say nasty shit on the Internet. What can you do about it? You owe the state of Rhode Island $75 million, so let’s call it even.
I will respect Curt for what he did to these two knuckleheads though, because it’s basically our calling card at Turtleboy Sports. He found out everything about them and blew their shit up:
The Sports Guru”? Ya he’s a DJ named Adam Nagel (DJ is a bit strong since he’s on the air for 1 hour a week) on Brookdale Student Radio at Brookdale Community College. How do you think that place feels about this stud representing their school? You don’t think this isn’t going to be a nice compilation that will show up every single time this idiot is googled the rest of his life? What happens when a potential woman he’s after googles and reads this?
The other clown? He’s VP of the Theta Xi fraternity at Montclair State University. I gotta believe if Theta Xi is cool with a VP of one of their chapters acting like this I’d prefer to have no one I know in it.
I lived next door to Theta Xi (AKA date-a-guy) at UMass Curt. I can assure you that none of those kids was ever in danger of having sex with someone’s daughter.
But Goddamn Shill, you redeemed yourself with that one. I like the way you do business. People say we’re edgy at Turtelboy because we call out dooshnozzles like Evan Heller (the guy who wrote “Fuck Chris Kyle” on his Facebook page). We put their pictures from Facebook on our blog. We humiliate them. We make it so when someone Googles their name Turtleboy Sports pops up first. We don’t go after nice people who are minding their own business. We go after people who wanna dance with the devil. Look who we’ve written about – Apple Daddy, Tsarnaevs, protesters who keep ambulances from getting to hospitals by blocking highways, Kanye West, Bob Kravitz, Melinda Boone. These are all people who put themselves out there with the sole purpose of being dooshnozzles. Anyone who can’t understand the difference is an idiot.
Then things took a really weird turn when Schilling linked a video that started with this disclaimer:
It’s this bizarre video of a rapper who supposedly goes to the home of some guy who talked shit on Youtube, confronts him, and then bashes his car with a baseball bat like he’s Carrie Underwood:
It’s clearly Curt Schilling’s wet dream. Oh yea, and it’s also not real. Everyone knows you can’t trace someone’s home by using an IP address. We found that out when Buffalo geniuses came up with about 10 different addresses in Worcester where our writers supposedly lived.
The bottom line is that what these kids said is OBVIOUSLY disgusting. But the Internet is a DISGUSTING place. It doesn’t make what they did right, but this is what happens on the Internet. Whatever you do don’t tell people you’re gonna kick their ass if they troll on you. Makes you look like a dink. So Curt fucked up at first, but then he rebounded nicely with the revenge doxing of these two nudniks. I just hope he realizes that this is only gonna urge people like them to create new Twitter handles that don’t have their names in it, and say even more vile, disgusting shit.
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