This is Jamal “Molly Mal” from Dalton (next to Pittsfield).
The Fiend Mile woke up yesterday and said to himself, “Ya know what I’m gonna do today? Sell $200 worth of food stamps for half price on a heavily trafficked western Mass Facebook yard sale group.”
Pro tip – if you’re an able bodied male trying to sell your unearned welfare on Facebook to strangers, try not to wear your $200 Jordans. The most amazing part about posts like this is the lack of self-awareness that makes them believe that this was a well thought out plan, and that it would be well received. Unfortunately for him the opposite happened, and now he’s on Turtleboy.
Don’t worry though, “big daddy” has plenty of cash for romantic nights out at Applebees with his “wife.”
Transportation to get his dog from one part of the state to the other.
New dogs to play with that dog when it finally arrives.
96 inche TVs.
Fireball, Heineken and Natty Light.
And side bitches who only take payments in food stamps and crack.
He’s a real romantic at heart though. Last month he got married at City Hall and for the honeymoon he pissed in a cup for his probation officer.
That’s gonna be the plot line if Nicholas Sparks ever starts making crackhead protagonists.
Like many great con-artists before him, Gorge Foreman has mastered the art of using his crotch fruit for sympathy in order to raise cash for himself. He’s even smart enough to use stock photos that clearly show a completely different daughter and father who actually has his shit together and doesn’t have to lie to strangers on yard sale pages to make money.
But I think we all know where the money is really going….
Case studies show that 99% of people who use the #NeverGiveUp hashtage relapsed within the last 48 hours.
I’ve been doing blogs on people selling their food stamps on Facebook for years now, and I can tell you from experience that the market rate is about 60-75% face value. $200 worth of stamps should go for at least $120. The fact that he’s selling for $100 means the Fiend Mile knows that Diego got some new product this week and that shit is gonna go FAST! So he needs cash now. Sure, he could just sell some of his Jordan’s, but it’s easier to lie about being a single Dad working 2 jobs whose baby momma OD’d for sympathy.
Poor little semen demon is suffering from heart disease.
Sorry kid, but if your healthcare is in the hands of your sperm donor then you ain’t gonna live to see 12. Luckily it’s not, and your old man, who you likely have no relationship with, is just using you to raise money to fund his habits.
He also wanted to clarify that it’s not begging for money if you’re selling something.
Bruh, accepting food stamps in and of itself is an act of begging. Except you don’t even need them since you’re selling them and the first of the month is still 3 weeks away.
He did have his defenders though.
Tara Taft ain’t snitching on no one! You have to get used to that sort of lifestyle when you’re a washed up white chick who exclusively drills men from Holyoke who wear flat brimmed Chicago Bulls hats.
It’s also racist to point out that a grown man selling food stamps on Facebook while wearing Jordans is problematic.
Terri Rough. You couldn’t possibly have a more appropriate last name to describe this woman.
That woman right there has seen some shit. That’ll happen when you’re a 4th string booty call Newport Light chimney.
Anyway, if the Fiend Mile wants to come on the live show this weekend to tell his side of the story he’s more than welcomed. Hit me up on Facebook at Clarence Woods Emerson!
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