Turtleboy Investigates

Failure Swift Destroyed Metro’s Reputation And Family, Took Out Restraining Order Against Elderly Father In Law, Has Never Ending “Businesses,” “Diseases,” And Fundraisers


Kathryn “Failure Swift” Narcisi is the latest person suing us for exposing them on Turtleboy Sports. She is unhinged, in serious need of psychiatric help, and has gone through a half dozen ex-husbands before settling on successful musician Metro Narcisi. We’re doing a three part series on how she has completely destroyed this once respected man. Click here to read Part 2 on TBDailyNews.



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43 Comment(s)
  • Former Student
    June 26, 2019 at 4:35 pm

    This is my first time commenting on a post here, but I do want to say that I’m glad the attention has been drawn to his crazy ass wife and not on him. As a former student I saw a great man, and an even better music teacher. He needs to get tf out before it’s too late. She attended a music trip to Disney World last spring and she was nagging him the entire time and she was being pushed around in a wheelchair… BY HIM. I ran into him once on that trip while he was by himself and it was on the plane ride home and he seemed so depressed. #freemetro

  • I See Dumb People
    I see Dumb people
    June 12, 2019 at 12:48 pm

    I just realised in one of this crazy whores videos she said her Rheumatologists prescribes her “chemo injection” .. Now im no doctor but why the fuck would a rheumatologist prescribe “chemo injection”.. My guess definitely not chemo most likely it is an anti-inflammatory/steriod. medication given by injection to treat arthritis as im preety sure a rheumatologist is for arthritis and such NOT cancer… Bitch cant even kerp her lies straight she has lies to cover her lies its insanity.. RUN METRO! !!

  • Klancy
    June 7, 2019 at 1:09 am

    I just realized the bitch said “chronic tachycardia”

  • Burlando Castile
    June 5, 2019 at 9:15 pm

    The second video was hilarious!!! Tachycardia?!!? TACHYCARDIA??! Technically, anything over 100 is tachycardia. Get anxious, stub your toe, have a fever, guaranteed you might cross a heart rate of 100. Serious tachycardia definitely has symptoms associated with it and you start seeing crazy rhythms and rates closer to 140-150+. Even then it depends on the rhythm, also her oxygen saturation was perfect.

    Essentially, any vital sign by itself is useless without context. You wouldn’t make one measurement and start building a house.

  • The Common Man
    June 5, 2019 at 12:12 am

    I told Metro in a previous blog to get away from this girl. She’s clearly ill with a personality disorder. That basically means she has the emotional and social IQ of a 5-6 year old but with the brain of an adult. Imagine as 5 year old with the power of an adult? This chick, probably had something very traumatic happen to her around age 5 or 6. She’s still a POS though and I’m not trying to excuse her behavior. What pisses me off the most isn’t failure swift, it’s the judges that continue to allow her to have those children even though she’s ruining their lives. Put yourself in a kids mind, imagine the chaos this chick creates in their daily lives? Posting drama online, moving between men, airing the families dirty laundry online, how do you think they feel when their friends bring it up in school? I get this women went through childbirth. I admire any women who wears the battle scares of pregnancy, I truly do, and I’m all for kids having their mom in their lives. At which point does the moms right as a mother get superseded by the kids right a stable life? I get that pregnacy puts a women through a lot, but at the end of the day, does that mean you get a right to ruin your kids live until they’re 18? She was able to manipulate a well respected community member(Metro), imagine the way she twist her kids perception of reality for her own gain? None of these judges care though, they can’t be held accountable for decisions they make in court, how asinine is that?

  • Captain Trips
    Mr. Wiseman
    June 4, 2019 at 8:32 pm

    Get the fuck out now Metro. You’ll probably lose your shirt but retain your dignity.

    Dump that parasite ASAP.

    I did a background check on my fiance before we got married. Sound weird? Not at all. You marry the wrong person and you’re FUCKED. Her check passed the test and we’ve been happily married for 26 years.

    I certainly would not have married her if she was married 4 times before, had evictions on her record, and had a credit rating of 350. I wouldn’t have cared if she looked like circa 1998 Britney Spears and lived to suck my dick.

  • Klancy
    June 4, 2019 at 3:44 pm

    Dear Metro, we all feel for you here. If you read TB (and we hope you do) you have to ask yourself a few questions. Do you love this woman or are you in love with the idea of being a nurturing loving hero? Nothing wrong with that role, BUT. Do you see the path of destruction she’s left in her wake? Do you see the clues starting to pile up before you that you’re going to be the next victim? Are you willing to ignore them?
    Dearest Metro, do you know what a stroke looks like? Even the tiniest TIA? Do you think someone could have THREE in a short amount of time and not show any of the symptoms? Was her face dropping?was her speech slurred? Could she use both sides of her body? Seems to me for someone so inflicted with a neurological attack she was able to nag you into how to hold the camera so she could get her best angel.
    Why are you always the scapegoat? Listen to the woman’s tone of voice. Metro, she’s a casebook abuser. She berates you, belittled you, runs you down, takes your money, makes it your fault and the next day loves you to death. It’s you and she against the world. The two of you forever.
    Meanwhile I guarantee she’s loading up a case against you so she has a lovely house and you have nada.
    She’s made your entire family out to be the bad guys. YOUR FAMILY, Metro who’ve loved you for years. Maybe they saw something you couldn’t see thru the blindness of grief and love. Time to step back and take a fresh look.
    Metro, you’re an incredibly talented man. PLEASE step into the counselors office where you teach and ask for a few minutes and a referral. This is your life on the line.
    She’s gonna go down hard with the FDA, IRS and a few other people and she’s gonna take you with her.
    It’s time to stop protecting her and save your own ass.
    She has no class no talent and she’ll never be half the woman your first wife was.

    • Milodog
      June 4, 2019 at 3:52 pm

      Excellent post, Klancy.

    • dowen0895
      Dick Scratcher
      June 4, 2019 at 8:05 pm

      Superb post.
      However, short version – “FUCK METRO! DON’T LET YOUR PSYCHO MRS TAKE YOUR HOUSE!”

  • Mick Fleetwood’s Balls
    June 4, 2019 at 2:38 pm

    Everyone commenting that “Narcisi- her last name suits her! narcissistic?”

    Um, wasn’t that HIS last name and it just happens to be a coincidence that it sounds like “narcissist?”

  • Milodog
    June 4, 2019 at 1:49 pm

    Metro, time to shit or get off the pot..dump her while your family still supports you before she causes irreparable damage. She is isolating you and the longer it continues, the harder it will be. Deep down you know the truth. She’s playing you and you know it.

  • Kim Wescott
    June 4, 2019 at 1:36 pm

    I don’t think I’ve ever read about anyone more ratchet than this one. Her last name suits her – so close to narcissism.

    She is certifiably insane and should be committed.

    Couple things I don’t understand: how can she fool a man whose beloved first wife actually died of cancer? Can people really have chemo at home? And just a shot? People I know have always had it in the hospital – IV for 3 or 4 hours, monitored constantly.

    Does she actually go to doctors for all these ailments? If you are married to her, wouldn’t you attend at least some of them? Or ask to review the office visit summary? If you were the sick one, wouldn’t you want to share them? After all, two heads are better than one.

    Can’t wait for the podcast with Metro’s estranged brother.

    I’m still shaking my head. I cannot imagine being in Metro’s shoes. Most men would have been gone long before.

  • Crazzy
    June 4, 2019 at 11:11 am

    Metro stuck his dick in crazy. Someone should have warned him.

  • Zac Effron
    June 4, 2019 at 10:58 am

    Kathryn, I am looking to re-enable my facebook account now that my movies are done. Can you please send a message to the masses, the ordinary folk, that I will becoming back on line in a couple of days. Your awesome at this and I appreciate your dedication.

  • Milton Gunzz
    June 4, 2019 at 10:46 am

    The only thing that can be said for this trash is that she doesn’t live with her parents. So she is 1 step above the “bowels” of society. But not much.

    • Hmm
      June 4, 2019 at 12:34 pm

      Maybe it’s better if she lived with her parents. That way, THEY scan take care of the failure that they raised. Metro can move on.

      (Are her parents still alive? They must be embarrassed. Or maybe they’re proud of her. Who knows.)

      • Milton Gunzz
        June 4, 2019 at 11:02 pm

        It is embarrassing but not to the parents. They old now.

  • hartf811
    June 4, 2019 at 10:37 am

    Coiled rattlesnake?
    Snarling wet stray dog?
    The glowing red burner on the stove?
    Man wearing kufi with a bazooka on his shoulder standing on a street corner?
    These are all things that most normal people know not to touch.
    5 other husbands littering her past and Metro missed…the signals?
    It wasn’t only his wife that died. His common sense was also laid to rest.

  • Zoot
    June 4, 2019 at 10:31 am

    Hey Metro, can you play Baker Street? I can play the shit out of Baker Street. You Belong To The City? That song gets me laid every year on the 80s reunion cruise.

  • I See Dumb People
    I see Dumb people
    June 4, 2019 at 10:17 am

    Thos chick is a total narcissistic bitch.. Its scary because she actually believes all the shit she says is reality ! Im ashamed to say I have a family member like her .. The bitch has multiple kids all different daddies has been married god knows how manytimes now ( i cut all contact with her many years ago and will never look back) I sure do miss her kids though.. Those poor kids ave had to raise themselves since they were like 5 years old when her latest victim( i mean husband ended his life. . Ots sad because he was a goid man and father to all her kids even tho only one was actyally his! She trains her kids to call whatever dude she moves in at any given time dad to try to keep them around longer… The bitch has destroyed EVERY guy and basically anyone who comes into her life yet ots never her fault oh and she is constantly sick with the latest most detrimental disease she cam think of.. Run while you still can metro she wil never change and will never accept responsiblity for her destructive actions it will always be someone else’s fault!!
    What is really shitty about all this is she will fake a domestic abuse to take down her husband and it is scum like her that makes it harder for actual abuse victims to come forward out of fear they wont be taken seriously because of attention seeking whores like this bitch.. Get fucked KC you are a disgrace to all woman and real survivors

    • Mom’s Basement
      June 4, 2019 at 10:34 am


  • Mom’s Basement
    June 4, 2019 at 10:12 am

    The way this whole thing is written reminds me of the talks gandma used to have with me when I was little. She’d say “I always told your father she was nothing but a dirty ho. I told him to stay away but do you think he listened? Then when your mom got knocked up with you I told him that it wasn’t his and he should run as far as possible from that skank ass bitch…” she went on and on but you get the idea.

    • dowen0895
      Dick Scratcher
      June 4, 2019 at 11:00 am

      Sounds like something from the Bates Motel……….

  • Haverhill Landlord
    Haverhill Landlord
    June 4, 2019 at 9:49 am

    We need to start a GoFundMe for Metro.

  • Hugh-Bo Mont
    June 4, 2019 at 8:49 am

    Cuckoo for Cocao Puffs

  • Walt Ostrander
    June 4, 2019 at 7:33 am

    In cases like this we must always take the womans word. Metro is a cis-white male, aka the most privileged class on the planet.

    • murdochpatsymcreynolds
      June 4, 2019 at 7:46 am

      Believe all women.

  • Fred
    June 4, 2019 at 6:43 am

    Chemo takes it all, even your eyebrows. Lying POS.

    • Skeptical of this Manipulative Bitch
      June 4, 2019 at 6:55 am

      Right? I don’t see any “bald patches” either. Just a uniformly shaved head

    • Milodog
      June 4, 2019 at 2:18 pm

      Yup. Also she claims her weight gain was inflammation..the pics she posted show it’s all cellulite, which is fat; inflammation is smooth. Guess that wasn’t part of her WebMD degree.

  • Jeff J
    This Bitch is Cray Cray
    June 4, 2019 at 6:18 am

    Talk about an attention whore. There are many many things wrong with this blatant narcissist. What’s with the oximeter she kept showing?? Is that supposed to prove that you’re gravely ill?? BIG F”ING DEAL, an elevated heart rate, so what. Don’t get me started with her fucking pronunciation.
    Problem is, she makes these elaborate videos about herself mistakenly thinking people give a shit. The longer you watch her, the more you realize how delusional she is. And then there’s Metro, poor poor Metro. Sad to say, but according to her track record, I think he’s fucked.

  • Jeff J
    June 4, 2019 at 6:12 am

    Talk about an attention whore. There are many many many things wrong with this blatant narcissist. What’s with the oximeter she kept showing?? Is that supposed to prove that you’re gravely ill?? BIG F”ING DEAL, an elevated heart rate, so what. Don’t get me started with her fucking pronunciation.
    Problem is, she makes these elaborate videos about herself mistakenly thinking people give a shit. The longer you watch her, the more you realize how delusional she is. And then there’s Metro, poor poor Metro. Sad to say, but according to her track record, he’s fucked.

    • Jeff J
      Duplicates Suck
      June 4, 2019 at 6:30 am

      Sorry…….split personality.

      • Sick of this
        June 7, 2019 at 9:39 pm

        No she is just a whore, she will fuck anything with a dick, even marred men . Sometimes when drunk will sleep with 3 in one night, I knew from the get go she would take every thing from him and he would have to pay child support. She always says it’s the guys who abused her sorry it’s the other way around. This story is far from over

  • whatevuh
    June 4, 2019 at 6:08 am

    I was going to read it, but after clicking all the way through it to see how long it was, I remembered I have to work today. Let me know when you get it down under 27 fucking pages

    • Jeff J
      Breakfast All Day......
      June 4, 2019 at 6:27 am

      You better hurry up, those egg mcmuffins aren’t gonna make themselves ya know.

  • dowen0895
    Dick Scratcher
    June 4, 2019 at 2:44 am

    Delusional, entitled, greedy, selfish, insane, mentalist ratchet.
    Possibly the most manipulative bitch ever blogged about on here.

    Needs putting in a secure unit for her own safety, but more for the safety of others. A vile woman.

    • dowen0895
      Dick Scratcher
      June 4, 2019 at 2:50 am

      Also, is it just me or does she have these second wedding ceremonies/vow renewals just to get more free shit from friends and relatives?

      Freeloading sea cow!

      • Guest
        June 4, 2019 at 6:14 am

        IDK. After someone’s fifth wedding, I’m kinda like “I’m not giving you anything else.”

      • Milodog
        June 4, 2019 at 2:01 pm

        She actually had three weddings to Metro..Xmas 2016 at home, then at Disney, then the ‘formal’ wedding at a venue in RI. AND IT WAS HER 6TH HUSBAND!!

        I’m a little curious if Metro knew how many times she was married..

        • Meems
          June 4, 2019 at 2:36 pm

          Probably not! If I was with someone married that many times, I’d wonder what was up. Then get the fuck outta there!

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