Social Justice Warriors

Fake Hate Crimes Like This One About A Trump T-Shirt Vendor Getting Attacked By A Mob Of Leftists Are Just As Bad As SJW Fake Hate Crimes


Fake hate crimes are an epidemic in this country, and they mostly come from the left. But Uncle Turtleboy gave me a story idea this morning out of Easton that reminded me that they can come from the right too.

So this unnamed veteran who runs a gypsy t-shirt shop on the side of the road in Easton was just minding his own business when all of a sudden multiple vans pulled up, dudes got out and attacked him, he alerted the Easton cop nearby who told him that he was on his own.


Sorry folks, gotta call this one as I see it. I’m sure I’ll incur the MAGA wrath but I just don’t care. You come to Turtleboy for hot, honest takes because you know we’ll call bullshit on anyone deserving of it. It just so happens that the left gives us a lot of material to work with, but if the straight pride parade chuds taught me anything it’s that right wingers are capable of self-victimization too. Sorry, not sorry.

The responses were the exact same kind of responses that every social justice queef gets when they post a made up story about some chick on the green line getting her hijab pulled off by MAGAnators with a noose.

It even got the reverse Jussie effect of blaming black people for the hate crime.

Now as a result, whoever the guy is who got jumped (no one of course has mentioned his name, or provided any evidence that this actually happened) is going to be protected by armed vigilante squads of local hardos like Bill here.

No. Just no. That’s why we have police. If this had actually happened, there is a 0.0% chance the Easton Police would tell the vendor to fuck off, like the Internet rumors are claiming.

And as usual there is profit to be made from a lie like this, and other people see a story like this and use it as a reason to pretend to be scared to go out in public.

Just like Jussie.

Some people did find the story to be implausible.

And that’s a good thing. You should always question stories like these. Always. If it seems like it’s too fucked up to be true, it probably is.

Turns out this was “witnessed” by exactly one person named Sandra Duhamel.

Then LoriAnn somehow heard about it, posted it on Facebook and it became a fact.

Clearly it likely never happened, as it would mean that the Easton Police have a policy of allowing vans of people to attack random vets running t-shirt shops at public intersections, so long as the attackers are leftists. But Bill, LoriAnn and Michael Goodman believed it because they wanted to believe it. They see how the left is cashing in on fake hate crimes and they wanted to be part of a victimized class too. The real world consequences are a distrust in the local police, people vowing to come armed to a t-shirt shop, and immediate suspicion of any black guy in a van driving through Easton.

If this offends you I apologize for nothing and urge you to get a towel to clean up your moist, sandy vagina.


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16 Comment(s)
  • Your town has always sucked and will always suck
    September 18, 2019 at 6:26 pm

    Easton fucking sucks. There is no reason to go there they have nothing. All they do there is sit around saying how glad they are their parents left them a house in easton and not brockton god forbid! Guess what? We don’t want you or your pillhead kids in brockton. You 50 year old bitches come to marketbasket and assault black women and your kids rob and assault elderly men. I wish I was there one time. Your all lying troublemaking entitled pill eating cunts.

  • Jack Mehoff
    September 17, 2019 at 12:05 pm

    How do I send a private tip to TB? Does anyone have an email address.
    Thanks, Jack Mehoff

  • dexter
    September 16, 2019 at 5:56 pm

    well I’m torn. I have met some grate police officers and a few lazy police officers. it also sounds possible but probably blown way out of proportion.

    • whatevuh
      September 16, 2019 at 6:43 pm

      grate = great

  • whatevuh
    September 16, 2019 at 5:03 pm

    not buying it, not even on double-coupon day . . . .

  • z
    September 16, 2019 at 4:26 pm

    Meanwhile Edawn Louis Coughman was arrested for calling in a hate crime in Georgia. MAGA hats , swastikas and everything.

    Yeah, Edawn. Former NFL player that I believe never played a down in a game that counted.

  • ChefHell666
    September 16, 2019 at 4:25 pm

    Both sides are insane

  • No they’re not, Squirtellgoil.
    September 16, 2019 at 3:41 pm

    They’re not even close to being as bad. No MSM outlet will pick up the story, no mobs of violent femmes will attack people, no one will be harassed and tormented at home or at work and no rioting will take place. Not from the Right, not even if it’s true and caught on film. The Right doesn’t do anything more than comment on FB or maybe send a disapproving email.

  • murdochpatsymcreynolds
    September 16, 2019 at 3:40 pm

    This story is preposterous! That Trumpster is a bald faced liar! Folks on the left are all about acceptance and love! Dems are incapable of something like this! Everyone knows this!

  • Jim
    September 16, 2019 at 3:37 pm

    The word hate is being used a lot today. When in fact it’s a stupid word that the stupid president spewed out of his mouth one day. Besides being remembered as one of the most racist and homophobic presidents in decades one thing that he’ll always be associated with is coming up with stupid words like fake!

  • WeRFucked
    September 16, 2019 at 3:23 pm

    Who wouldn’t spit on anyone selling Trump shit made in China?

    • lotsrib
      September 17, 2019 at 9:21 am

      jam your chinese made cellphone side wards up your ass

  • Bizzarro World
    September 16, 2019 at 2:59 pm

    Why would they make up the story about the police doing nothing. Not only is that easy to disprove but it would never happen

    • Bizarre World Redux
      September 16, 2019 at 3:48 pm

      Apparently you’ve never seen the violent televised attacks on Trump supporters in Berkeley, Albuquerque, New York, Portland etc., when the local Police Departments stood by and watched law abiding citizens being beaten by Antifa with bike locks. Fuck face.

      • Don’t Cry
        September 16, 2019 at 3:53 pm

        Someone strike a nerve pussy boy?

      • Your Mom
        September 16, 2019 at 3:56 pm

        We’re you there? You must a a ton of frequent flier miles. And a giant stretched asshole

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