Fuck Puppet Tells Random Woman He’s Going To Kill Himself, Gets Her To Try To Help, Then Mocks Her And Tells Her It’s Punishment For Thinking He Wanted To Bang Her


This is Brock Tamburini from Virginia.

As you can see, he’s a grown ass man with a chin strap, which by definition means he’s a massive toolbag here for our amusement. He also likes to flash what I like to call rural gang signs – constant pictures of himself with fish.

Bro, do you even fish?

Anyway, Toby Queef apparently has been doing some fucked up shit online to random women he doesn’t know in Facebook groups for Boxers (the dogs). Stuff like, pretending to be suicidal because he hates women and thinks everyone’s trying to ride his baloney pony or something:

He literally gives her a time period of when he’s gonna off himself:

As douchey as he sounds in writing, imagine him with the worst southern accent ever and he gets a million times worse. He literally tells her that he was pretending to be suicidal and laughing as she tried to get him help, because he liked to waste her time and she’s a whore for thinking that he’d have a chance to bang her, or something.

Of COURSE he references Jesus too. Remember that chapter of the Gospel where Jesus was fucking with Mary Magdalene and said he was gonna kill himself, but then he said he was just kidding and she was really an ugly whore with bags under her eyes who he could fuck if he didn’t have a girlfriend? They never read that one at church anymore, but they should.

Somehow this meat pony has a girlfriend who willingly chooses to be with him too.

Sounds like she really respects herself.

He classifies himself as an “inventor” because he likes to shoot things.

Which of course is code for “unemployed.” So it looks like Brock’s girlfriend has really good taste, and this is a relationship built to last. What chick wouldn’t wanna be with a guy who’s spent more time in fish then he has inside women, randomly tells strange women around the country that he’s gonna kill himself for the fuck of it, and rocks a bad hoodbooger chinstrap into his 30’s? Hey Brock, I know you were just kidding about the suicide thing, but if you’re ever serious about it I got this chick I know named Michelle Carter would could give you some GREAT advice.


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25 Comment(s)
  • JP
    March 3, 2020 at 1:49 pm

    Why does a Virginia accent make him any more douchey ? A douche is a douche no matter where there from. Newsflash we are not exactly loved around the country ourselves.

    • JP
      March 3, 2020 at 1:51 pm

      they are I meant. My bad.

  • Corinth Arkadin
    March 3, 2020 at 10:49 am

    “..He also likes to flash what I like to call rural gang signs – constant pictures of himself with fish.”

    And that’s why I keep coming here.

    March 3, 2020 at 6:56 am

    Too many emotional, overly sensitive people in this country. soft like mashed fuckin potatoes & its pathetic. If someone tells me they are going to kick their air addiction and check out of their meat suit. Then I’m throwing up my trigger and my middle! People need to grow the fuck up, grow a back bone & stop being soooooo fucking fragile and overly fucking sensitive. Grow some skin there fifi and realize that the whole threat of suicide is just to gain sympathy and attention. It’s a ploy to play on your fifi’s so the one saying it can manipulate the fuck out of you! Everyone knows a suicidal person who is 100% suicidal and on that path does not announce that they are checking out, they just check the fuck out. Its their way to subvert the power dynamics in any relationship or interaction. Especially in dating relationships! Someone tells you they want to check out. you call the police and give them that person’s name. That’s it, that is your duty, nothing more nothing less. If more people started getting the police involved after threats of suicide.
    The people making those threats would think first about being tackled by 15 cops, tazed, hog tied & sent off to a padded room for 72 hours before they made those threats for attention ever again!

      March 3, 2020 at 7:16 am

      JJ, mgtow turtle… geez Bret. Pick a name and stick with it.

      We miss you on the Live show man!!

      Ditch that mgtow character of yours though. He’s a fucking maniac!!

  • Whaa
    March 3, 2020 at 5:20 am

    Tomahawk Yerrier. Makes perfecto senso.

  • Jewmerica the ugly
    March 3, 2020 at 12:53 am

    All Jewish countries are full of retarded gas heads, now their live for the world to laugh at this kike country.

  • Mr. Bubba
    March 3, 2020 at 12:49 am

    Not my friend. Not my problem.

  • Silencio Dogood
    March 3, 2020 at 12:06 am

    This sad case needs referring to the Department of Mental Hygiene, the same folks who tried in vain to help Benjie ‘Blue Boy’ Carver. This simp likes Fish Sticks, if you get my drift, the horror in the eyes of those poor bastards tells the story. It’s time to sic the middleweights on him.

  • Gadabout Gaddis
    March 2, 2020 at 9:32 pm

    Please don’t promise us that you’ll kill yourself, What possibly could the world do without an unemployed douche bag who counts fishing as his major achievement.

  • So what
    March 2, 2020 at 9:25 pm


  • Jeff J
    She's a Way Better Person Than Me
    March 2, 2020 at 9:10 pm

    As soon as I got that first message about hanging himself I would’ve told him he doesn’t have the guts. But that’s just me.

  • Whatever you do, no matter what they might tell you, NEVER stick your dick in a toaster oven. It will end badly.
    March 2, 2020 at 8:51 pm

    Biden 2020

    • Granny Warrens Sweater Collection
      March 2, 2020 at 9:00 pm

      How dare you

  • Naft
    March 2, 2020 at 6:13 pm

    Dude, have you just recently become an asshole? or were you born that way?

  • LOB
    March 2, 2020 at 6:04 pm

    turn off the lights, the party is over !

  • Jordis
    March 2, 2020 at 5:55 pm

    I know a local radio DJ that does something very similar…pulls the suicidal tendencies and then flips to being a horn dog.

    Does this actually work? What woman wants to hang a crybaby?

  • Don Rickles
    March 2, 2020 at 5:38 pm

    Is that a Rainbow Trout or Amanda Sawyer?

  • Startled Pancake
    March 2, 2020 at 5:25 pm

    I usually stick my tiny dick in a fish’s mouth

    • The Artist Formerly Known as the Startled Pancake
      March 3, 2020 at 10:54 am

      Hey stop using my name, Faggot. That’s my appellation for you.

      On second thought, you can have the name. You seem to need help with finding a moniker.

      Good Luck.

      To all other turtle riders, look for my sign.

      • Limp Loaf of Bread
        March 3, 2020 at 5:16 pm

        What’s the obsession with calling people faggot?
        Some deep seeded homosexuality is our guess

  • Ace
    March 2, 2020 at 5:09 pm

    Who. The. Fuck. Cares.

  • The Byrds
    March 2, 2020 at 5:09 pm

    Hey Mr Tamburini man, eat a bullet for me.

  • TB, pick me up at 8:30 tonight, OK?
    March 2, 2020 at 5:08 pm

    And it will be dark, so please make sure your lighted UBER sign is illuminated so I know it is you. Thanks.

  • King Friday
    March 2, 2020 at 4:51 pm

    Nice Catfish.

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