Hoodrat Heroes

Granny Stretchmarks, Betty Bovine, And Ginger Teen Mom Holding Baby Threaten Lawsuits If Video Of Them Losing Their Minds On Sears Clerks Ends Up On Youtube Or Facebook

Follow @TurtleboyNews on Twitter by clicking here

Follow Turtleboy on Instagram by clicking here

Follow and like Turtleboy Sports Returns and Clarence Woods Emerson to keep up with the hilarious turtle rider commentary.

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information.

If you like free speech and want to support what we’re doing, feel free to donate to the Turtle fund:









Hey fam – if you’d like to support Turtleboy and what we do here, feel free to hit the donate button at the top. We basically have to run this site like a Bernie Sanders campaign now since we’ve been blacklisted by Google and Facebook, due to the fact that rabid SJWs keep reporting our posts. Getting blacklisted by Google is a death sentence for most websites, since it’s much harder to monetize. And we all know the damage Facebook has done. We’re never going to stop fighting for free speech, but in the meantime the best way for turtle riders to fight back is to donate to the cause. Without you people none of this is possible. We love you all. 


Meanwhile in Texas…..

“If this ends up on Youtube I will personally sue your ass.”

“If it ends up on Facebook, I will sue you.”

Looks like it only ended up on Twitter so far, so the camerawoman is in the clear.

“You can’t record if you don’t wanna be recorded.”

So true. When I go into a store and they have surveillance cameras the first thing the clerk does is make me sign a waiver so I can consent to being recorded. That’s how being out in public works.

“My attorney will love you. And I’m calling Sears too.”

The amount of cheesehogs who seem to have an attorney on retainer, and are just a phone call away, is getting higher and higher these days.

I have no idea what they were mad about, but I’m willing to bet it was over a scam of their’s that didn’t work out as planned. They wanted cash from the clerks and they clearly were not getting it, thus leading to the ratchtacular behavior that was displayed in that video. Granny Stretchmarks was NOT happy about their return policy….

And you know that Betty Bovine was serious when the busted out her pointing finger…

Of course they’re doing all of this while holding a baby

Which is obviously healthy. The baby is just getting acclimated with this sort of public display of boobery, which will soon become her life. Luckily the older girl can show her how to brace for these frequent scenese, which will become a regular part of her life:

And that ladies and gentlemen, is why we need a Texas Turtleboy. It’s why Turtleboy needs to expand from coast to coast. What we do is not something that only appeals to people living in New England. Every week during the live show we have people from California, Missouri, Florida, Pennsylvania, you name it. It’s spreading like wildfire, because ratchets are relatable. And what we’re doing in New England can be replicated anywhere.

On that note, we’re always looking for new bloggers. We pay based on traffic you generate. So if you’re funny and engaging, and you see stuff like this happening and you wanna start blogging about it, come join the Turtleboy team. If we had a Texas Turtleboy we could open up a whole new market of turtle riders. Or Florida, or Michigan, or New Jersey, or California. You could be from literally anywhere in this country, and if you write engaging content people will start riding the turtle around you. You don’t have to be from the area you blog in either. It really doesn’t matter. If you’re funny, engaging, and like to write, send us an email at turtleboysports@gmail.com.

13 Comment(s)
  • Publius
    July 10, 2018 at 10:52 pm

    a bunch of slobes. Unfortunately we have too many in Worcester slopping at the public welfare trough.

  • WhatAFatSlob
    July 10, 2018 at 7:47 pm

    That fat slob is suing for ass. When your ass is as big as Texas you shouldnt sue the ass off anyone. Fat slob.

  • Agressive Sounder
    July 10, 2018 at 5:50 pm

    A group of a feral pigs is called a Sounder.

    Liberal politics and ratchets aside here in Mass, these pig women are what passes for middle class possibly up-scale in Texas.

  • Clitty Litter
    July 10, 2018 at 5:36 pm

    Does that shirt say “Mrs. Tools and Dinks”.
    ……asking for a friend.

  • Type 2 Diabetes
    July 10, 2018 at 5:00 pm

    There’s nothing more dangerous than a morbidly obese woman caught in the wild bewteeen feedings. A very dangerous animal indeed. They were just psychotic because of low blood sugar, that’s when the animal activates it’s fight or flight response. The lack of hard currency as a refund option clearly triggered the fight response.
    The only option one has is to shoot the beast with a tranquilizer dart from a safe distance. Trap and transport the animal by C130 cargo plane or skyhook chopper to the nearest fast food delivery feeding station. Problem solved.

    State of Texas Fish And Game Commission

  • TJB
    July 10, 2018 at 3:28 pm

    All the stores are doing that now, store credit, gift card or return to the debit/charge card. No more cash for ripped off merchandise. Tough shit.

  • Mike
    July 10, 2018 at 2:51 pm

    Please please please somebody open a Turtleboy franchise in California.

  • itsjustme
    July 10, 2018 at 2:14 pm

    It sounded like they were upset because they returned something and instead of getting cash back the money was going back on the credit card she paid with. I don’t think they understand you still get your money back that way because she said something like “you already charged me and tnow won’t give me money” and the employer o0) awert explained (probably for 100th time) she was getting it back, the same way she paid for it, back on the credit card.

  • Tim
    July 10, 2018 at 1:29 pm

    You can’t spell loser with enough Ls to describe these people.

  • D. Nutz
    July 10, 2018 at 1:14 pm

    I WISH a bitch would!

  • y
    July 10, 2018 at 12:54 pm

    Ass looks like a bag of wet clothes.

  • z
    July 10, 2018 at 12:41 pm

    Looks like auditions for a reality show.

    They probably participate in pagents.

    • Maude Gorman
      July 10, 2018 at 2:17 pm


Comment on this Post


All-Star Worcester Parents Lay Siege To School Bus, Beat Up Bus Driver, Then Write Magnificent Things On Facebook
Comments From The Worcester Parent Bus Riot Blog Were Borderline Orgasmic
Hot Girl Threatening To Sue Turtleboy Sports Over Busgate, City Council Still Hasn’t Even Mentioned It