Hoodrat Heroes

Haverhill Moms Forgot Christmas Is 2 Days Away, Ask Strangers On Facebook To Play Santa Claus Because She Had A Dentist Appointment

Haverhill Moms Forgot Christmas Is 2 Days Away, Ask Strangers On Facebook To Play Santa Claus Because She Had A Dentist Appointment

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at [email protected] for more information.

The Turtleboy Sports Facebook page AND the Lost Boys of Turtle have been unpublished. While we fight to get them back please make sure to like and follow the Turtleboy Sports Fallout Shelter Freedom Page page by clicking on the image above, as well as our other backup pages the Turtleboy Refugees, Turtleboy Sports Safe Space, and Turtleboy Smiles And Sunshine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Santa Claus is coming to town in T-minus 48 hours, but the boo-hoo patrol is still out in full force, trying to cash in on the generosity of others in Haverhill…..

She’s got two boys, age 17 and 15, and a girl who’s 12. Now check out her Facebook page. I’m not gonna post any pictures of kids, but as you can see if you click on it, she’s posting pictures of a boy who clearly is neither 17 or 15. Not even close.

Many people asked the obvious question – why are you looking to start your free Christmas shopping two days before Christmas? But the feelings fanatics were out in full force to yell at them every time they tried to do so:

Now all of a sudden Theresa Brown has cancer. She didn’t mention that in the post, and I’m not saying it’s a lie. Just kind of convenient, that’s all.

Nevertheless, anyone who doesn’t immediately question something like this is a complete and utter moron. There’s no other way around it. You live in Haverhill. A city filled to the brim with assholes looking to con you. This woman is randomly asking for three shit two days before Christmas and hasn’t started her shopping yet. Yup, nothing shady about that!!

When someone tried pointing out that she’s far from the first person with personal struggles trying to make ends meet on Christmas, she got annihilated with butthurt:

LOL. Oh no, she’s a teacher!! God forbid we have teachers who believe in self reliance. That would be a terrible example to set for the children!

Gotta love Eunice’s immediate response of “none of your business” too. She’s earned the right though. After all, she did save France from radical Islamic terrorism.

The best part is how none of them have given shit either. They literally just police the comments section to gain the moral high ground on anyone who doesn’t immediately believe a stranger on the Internet.

After that it was ratchet see, ratchet do, as another All-Star Mom who forgot about Christmas put her hat out for a handout too:

So she was gonna provide a Christmas for her children, two of whom are adults, but she had “surgery” on December 22, so that threw everything off. What was the surgery for Jennifer? Must’ve been pretty major to keep you from doing any sort of Christmas shopping?

Yup, they pulled those 7 stragglers hanging on for dear life out of her gums. Sounds legit. Luckily for her Jennifer doesn’t really need any teeth because she only does duck faced selfies anyway:

Sometimes with the dog filter of course:

So yea, if you’re looking to get some gullible morons to donate some free Christmas shit for your kids, tomorrow’s pretty much your last chance to go on a community page and beg for it. Just make sure you have a really good lie, and use your kids whenever possible. Kids at Christmas are the cash cow that just keeps on giving.

Advertisements
17 Comment(s)
  • Haverhill Landlord
    December 24, 2017 at 3:22 pm

    This is where Turtleboy provides a valuable service: I’ve added the names of these beggars and their supporters to my “People to not rent apartments to” list. Fuck these folks.

  • Finn
    December 23, 2017 at 6:27 pm

    Jennifer has a fucked up fascination with reposting animal abuse stories and pictures. Sometimes she posts videos of very graphic animal torture. She’s a fucked up person. There are no redeeming qualities about this woman.

  • Itsjustme
    December 23, 2017 at 1:00 pm

    She should be asking her adult children for help not asking for gifts for them too from strangers. Why do I get the impression her two adult children aren’t struggling college students but are jobless and still living at home with mom?
    I myself have a 20 year old. Yes we bought her gifts but not as much as prior years and plan on just giving her money, because she said she didn’t want or need anything. But she bought her younger siblings just about as much as we did.

  • Smitty
    December 23, 2017 at 7:07 am

    In every picture of Jennifer I seriously thought I was looking at a puckerd asshole. Stop just stop.

  • Turtle Rider
    December 23, 2017 at 6:35 am

    That photo of the kid looks pretty old. I mean, it doesn’t look like it was taken with a modern camera. And look at the kid’s watch. Maybe it’s just a throwback.

  • Turd Reversalist
    December 23, 2017 at 4:21 am

    Now THIS one’s got potential.
    When she puckers up, all I can think about is a freshly toothless gummy to slick up before tapping the bummy. Yeah, some tingle action there.
    Should be worth a $20 Walmart card to help in her time of need.
    We can all do our part, right? I’ll part those cheeks.

  • DJ Trump
    December 23, 2017 at 4:15 am

    Cyberbegging has reached it’s apex.
    Sooner or later, these communists are going to run out of other peoples money.
    That’s when the real fun begins.
    The Free Shit Army will come to your front door to see what you’ve got
    …that they want.

    • Lolajack
      December 23, 2017 at 4:28 am

      What do you expect? We’ve had the government promoting dependency on others for so long now they’ve come to expect their needs will be met. Big surprise for those who find out that others aren’t willing to support them. Try to take what doesn’t belong to them will be interesting.

  • Lolajack
    December 23, 2017 at 3:44 am

    More internet panhandling. People have no pride.

  • holidaze
    December 23, 2017 at 12:39 am

    this is the best site to be on at holidaze time

    let’s be warm and welcoming to all visitors
    and not scare away old visitors especially not females we need more females!

    translation: Don’t Be a Dick, commenter boys and girls 😉

    • ps
      December 23, 2017 at 12:48 am

      ps just a random point on a random blog, not in reference to these comments

      • holidaze
        December 23, 2017 at 1:35 am

        whoever downvoted, stop being a grinch

  • IB Serious
    December 23, 2017 at 12:22 am

    Please GoFundMe ! I need some help. I’m childless and don’t have any Christmas presents for Me. All I want from Santa is some neato tattoos, and if you could make a mortgage payment it’d be a big help. My car needs an inspection, but I was asking about putting a blower on it (Blower please), but the mechanic said that wouldn’t cost near as much as the $10,000 in structural work that would need to be done first. And I could use some new clothes cuz most of mine are last years style. I have a wonderful dog that would enjoy more of a premium type dog-food and while we’re at it, I could use a smartphone upgrade. $40,000 should make a good dent in these expenses and I don’t think it’s asking too much and anything you can give would be a super mega big help. ps. Can I have a $750 gift card to Wegmans so I can eat something other than store-brand lobster? God Bless !

    • sucker
      December 23, 2017 at 10:07 am

      I almost donated, I was SO close. If you used the phrase “it’s the holidays”, it would have put me over the edge and I would have broke out my Discover card.

  • Finn
    December 22, 2017 at 11:33 pm

    Shithead (nee “Christopher Roy”,

    “WWJD?” Excellent question. If you’re a believer, Jesus would teach a man to fish.

    He would not encourage tongue piercings, duckface selfies, filter selfies, and pandering on Facebook. He might encourage humility, grace and a bit of soul searching.

    Eric Croteau – you’re a piece of shit too. “If your really sorry then buy a gift for her kid. Words mean nothing.” Well, you’ve got the 2nd part right — words mean nothing HER WORDS. Boo hoo hoo she is a shit-bag mom and now her words should mean something. What about *her* actions? What about yours Eric? Feeling righteous after your run-in with the law??

    Fondly,
    Finn

  • TJB
    December 22, 2017 at 11:00 pm

    They’re coming out of the woodwork now. I heard there’s a fat sea cow that helps folks like this…but only if they are black.

  • Itsjustme
    December 22, 2017 at 10:56 pm

    Nothing better than seeing a 60 year old with 100 duck face selfies.

Comment on this Post

*

RELATED POSTS
All-Star Worcester Parents Lay Siege To School Bus, Beat Up Bus Driver, Then Write Magnificent Things On Facebook
Comments From The Worcester Parent Bus Riot Blog Were Borderline Orgasmic
Hot Girl Threatening To Sue Turtleboy Sports Over Busgate, City Council Still Hasn’t Even Mentioned It