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Hey Kim Davis, Do Your Job Because No One Cares What Your Opinion On Gay Marriage Is

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Everyone’s been talking about this insane woman Kim Davis from Kentucky who’s going to the clink because she won’t marry gay people. The problem of course is that as a county clerk she’s now legally required to do so, since the Supreme Court ruled that gay marriage is legal in all 50 states. She can’t be fired though because she was elected to her job. The people of Kentucky chose her. Thus the only way to get rid of her is to vote her out of office. And in Kentucky, odds are she’s probably popular for a reason.

Look, this issue is probably the simplest I have ever seen – she was elected to do a job. Her opinion on anything couldn’t possibly be more irrelevant. No one gives a shit what she thinks about gay marriage. Her job is to issue marriage licenses to any two people who fit the requirement. And according to the only body that matters when it comes to law, gay people have a right to get married. So if she doesn’t do the job she’s been hired to do, she goes to jail for contempt. It doesn’t make her a martyr, it makes her a criminal.

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You know who has to do some shit at work that they don’t agree with? Everyone. Literally everyone. There isn’t a person in America who hasn’t had a boss enforcing a rule in their workplace that they think is bat shit insane. In grown up world we’ve all come to accept this as part of life. There is only one cure for this – alcohol.

The best part about this of course is that it turns out she’s been divorced three times and has a bunch of bastard children. All of which are frowned upon by the God that she’s pretending to care so much about. Newsflash – no one actually believes you’re doing this for religious reasons. You’re doing it because you’re just an asshole. Because gay people don’t threaten the institution of marriage, you do. You made a mockery of it when you married the first, second, third, and fourth idiots to come along in a Chevy Tahoe.

No normal person is defending her. Only crazy people. Even some of the more conservative politicians have distanced themselves from this nudnik. But one of these idiots is a popular right wing blogger named Matt Walsh. Sometimes this guy is alright, but once he gets going about gay marriage only stupid things come out. Let’s check out some of the hilarious things he’s saying:

Among supporters, I’m hearing people draw comparisons to Rosa Parks. I think there are some parallels between the two cases, and it certainly bears remembering that Rosa Parks, who broke the law, wasn’t crucified and ostracized for past sins (whatever they may have been) by her own people. Neither was MLK, for that matter.

Oh yea, she’s exactly like Rosa Parks. Except Rosa Parks was eventually exonerated by the Supreme Court because what the city of Montgomery was doing was against federal law. In this case it’s the exact opposite. She’s the one who is breaking federal law.

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Many people have said, “Well, gay ‘marriage’ is the law of the land, so that’s that,” but what they mean is, “Well, five people in Washington support gay ‘marriage,’ so that’s that.” No, that isn’t that. That’s tyranny. That’s injustice. That’s illegal.

LOL. What fucking planet is this guy living on? Tyranny? Five people? Illegal? Hey dipshit, this is what the Supreme Court does. They decide what’s constitutional and what’s not. They’re appointed by the President that we elect and they’re confirmed by the congress that we elect. Tyrants are dictators like Roger Goodell who arbitrarily make themselves king. You can agree or disagree with the court all you want, but the fact of the matter is that they didn’t get there by force. They were put there as part of the democratic process. Don’t be butthurt because your team is losing.

Since the beginning of human civilization up until about 87 seconds ago, all societies have recognized that the man-woman relationship is special and powerful. This bond gives birth to new people, and this new collection of people are what we call “families,” and these families serve as the very bedrock and foundation of humanity.

Yes, Kim Davis has done a fantastic job of showing us all how “special and powerful” the man-woman relationship is. Because nothing says special like marrying half of Wanker County and popping out kids like hot cakes.


Gay couples cannot produce families. They cannot produce anything. They serve no practical purpose to society.

I beg to differ. My gay neighbors keep their lawn nice and tidy and have probably helped increase my property value. They serve a very practical purpose as far as I’m concerned.

Only, we find out, that’s not the case with Kim Davis. In a statement, she owned up to her sins and explained that she just came to Christ four years ago. She didn’t justify or rationalize the divorces, thus she is not guilty of hypocrisy. She is merely guilty of being a sinner, as are we all.

Oh I see. So she magically found God four years ago and now this makes her an authority on all things involving morality. By that logic a child molester can come out of the clink and start teaching pre-school.


The one thing I will say in her and Matt Walsh’s defense is that they’re absolutely right that the government only chooses to enforce some laws that defy the federal government. Marijuana is technically illegal according to federal law. But no one gives a shit about weed, and rightfully so, which is why Colorado and Washington have made it completely legal. but technically they’re defying federal law.

Same thing with gun licenses. You can be in favor or opposed to gun control all you want, but the fact of the matter is that according to the second amendment, you can buy a gun. But it’s pretty much impossible to get a legally registered gun in Worcester because the police chief can arbitrarily decide whether or not you can buy one. There’s absolutely no difference between denying someone access to a gun, allowing people to buy and sell weed, and denying gay people a marriage license.

Look, gay marriage shouldn’t even be an issue because the government shouldn’t be recognizing any marriages. Because “marriage” is a religious rite of passage that every major faith in the world recognizes. And the government shouldn’t be recognizing any religious ceremony as legitimate. It’s not their job to recognize a marriage any more than it is to recognize a first communion. Any two people who seek to join in a legally binding contract that ties them together as one should be allowed to do so. Then homophobic folks can get “married” in their churches and be recognized by the church, and gay couples can still have the legal rights that straight people have. Boom. Problem solved.

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17 Comment(s)
  • jay
    September 8, 2015 at 10:01 pm

    I am not perfect. No one is. That is why I go to church and pray for forgiveness for my sins. I am a Christian. I believe what the Bible says. Gay marriage is a sin. I applaud her for standing up for her belief. This society finds it acceptable to take God out of everything because it offends someone’s religion … but when a Christian stands up for their belief they are automatically wrong. Altho MANY religions say that marriage it between an man and a woman … we Christians are the bad ones because we stand by our religious beliefs.

    I do not agree with the decision to put her in jail. I do not care what you or anyone else thinks of me and my belief. I only care what God thinks of me on judgement day. Good for her and I hope many other Christians stand up as she has done.

    • Chris From Georgia
      September 9, 2015 at 7:48 am

      Well said Jay, well said!

    • Finnish Goalie
      September 9, 2015 at 8:56 am

      Other religions do have similar views. However, it isn’t a practicing Jew or Muslim that has this job in Kentucky, now is it?

    • Finnish Goalie
      September 9, 2015 at 8:59 am

      She apparently thinks God is alright with her multiple divorces?

  • Chris From Georgia
    September 8, 2015 at 4:35 pm

    And today the same judge released Kim from jail!!!

  • Loyal reader
    September 8, 2015 at 12:34 pm


  • JayC
    September 8, 2015 at 8:39 am

    If this lady doesn’t feel she can do her job after the Supreme Court ruled on the issue, than its time to go either voluntarily or by force. Her religious opposition has been argued by others throughout the series of cases leading up to the ruling. If she was that opposed why didn’t she hire a lawyer to file a brief in the case about her position as a county clerk. Does she think she’s the first person in America to disagree with a Supreme Court decision? Most people have enough respect for the rule of law to not give SCOTUS the finger like she is doing after they decide the case. Seriously lady, go back to 4th grade history class when they tought about branches of government and the Supreme Court is the highest court and has the final say on the law of the land.

    Most people take their social justice stand on [insert issue] get locked up long before SCOTUS decides to review the matter, not after. Even someone as dumb as RBG understands you want to get arrested and have the Supreme Court undo the charges, not get arrested defying their decision. That’s not saying much for Kim Davis being dumber than RBG and the SJW’s.

    I don’t have a dog in this fight either way, but what really drives me nuts are the sanctimonious people who get on their high horse against gay marriage reasoning that it is “offensive to the institution of marriage.” The Kardashians and anyone on the trashy MTV shows are more offensive to the institution of marraige than gay people who do nothing more than love eachother like the rest of society around us and wish to marry.

  • Nanny
    September 8, 2015 at 6:49 am

    If you’re morally opposed to doing your job you need to find another job.

  • RJ
    September 8, 2015 at 12:00 am

    If she wanted to be a martyr, she should have just resigned in protest…but no, she isn’t taking some kind of principled stand, she just has a little bit of power so she decided to use it against a group she hates. That doesn’t make her a persecuted, it makes her the dictator.

  • Chris From Georgia
    September 7, 2015 at 6:09 pm

    TB you’re wrong. The issue is far more complex than it appears. While the Supreme Court rendered a decision making same sex marriage legal, there is one minor point everyone has overlooked. The Supreme Court cannot make law only the Congress can. In this case it is up to the invidual states to change their laws to be in line with Courts ruling. Therefore it is up to the state legislature in Kentucky to resolve this issue.

    By the way of you’re stating tjat an elected offical should be jailed for not upholding the law, we should start with the President who picks and chooses which laws he enforces!

    • Finnish Goalie
      September 7, 2015 at 8:21 pm

      The Supreme Court made no law. It interpreted the 14th Amendment’s equal protection and due process clauses to include the right of consenting gay couples to marry.

      That’s what they do. They rule laws constitutional and unconstitutional. They’ve been doing it for centuries.

      • Chris From Georgia
        September 8, 2015 at 7:57 am

        First this nation is just under 250 years old so stating that the Supreme court has been doing for centuries is a bit of a stretch. Second the Court’s interpretation of the 14th Amendment means that Kentucky’s laws regarding marriage are unconstitutional. I believe we are in agreement on that point. However the State Legislature in Kentucky must change their laws regarding marriage and provide reasonable accommodation for those with a religious objection. The state legislature in Kentucky has not done this yet.

        • Finnish Goalie
          September 8, 2015 at 9:36 am

          I could say 200 plus years if that’s more to your liking?

          • Chris From Georgia
            September 8, 2015 at 1:15 pm

            Sounds good to me!

  • fordsnharleys
    September 7, 2015 at 4:35 pm

    Marriage is a business contract as far as the government is concerned. This contract may only be dissolved by the government. With a bunch of lawyers reaping profits. Of course being a partner in the business gives one certain rights over others to claim ownership through familial ties. And that is the bottom line.

  • Sissy Hankshaw
    September 7, 2015 at 11:28 am

    dude acts like we’re somehow gonna run out of kids because gays don’t procreate

    • Wabbitt
      September 7, 2015 at 2:54 pm

      Kids are not special miracles. There’s seven BILLION people on this ball of dirt we call Earth. We’re not rebuilding after the flood anymore.

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