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Muncie Star Press: A dispute over “the last rib” at a family barbecue ended with one Muncie, IN woman stabbing another in the eye with a fork, police said.
Sabrina A. Davis, 45, 2005 N. Turner St., was arrested Sunday night on a preliminary charge of criminal recklessness.
According to an affidavit, Davis was a guest at another family’s gathering in the 2200 block of North Turner Street when the homeowner’s daughter became upset over Davis “taking the last rib from the kitchen.”
That woman confronted Davis “about taking all the food,” and told officer Amy Kesler that Davis responding by stabbing her in the left eye with a fork she had been using “to take meat from a pan.”
The victim had “at least two small lacerations on her left eyelid,” Kesler wrote, and her eye was “swollen and bloodshot.”
A witness told police the victim “was frustrated that Davis was taking so much food from the house,” and after being wounded in the eye, “grabbed a knife from the counter and was trying to get to Davis.”
However, Davis maintained she was acting in self defense, insisting the other woman was already brandishing the knife when she stabbed her in the eye.
Davis — who remained in the Delaware County jail on Tuesday under a $5,000 bond — confirmed “the dispute was over the last rib in a pan,” Kesler wrote.
This same exact thing happened to Homer Simpson when he went to the all-you-can-eat Seafood buffet. I will ask you all the same question that Lionel Hutz posed to jurors – Does this look like a woman who had AALLLLLLLL she could eat?
Say what you want, but you’re lying to yourself if Sabrina Davis isn’t EXACTLY how you pictured her. She is exactly how I pictured here. She is real and she is FANTASTIC!! That right there is a woman who knows how to GET AND KEEP her ribs.
And I just wanna thank the state of Indiana for producing amazing people like Sabrina Davis. Some days are slower blogging days than others. So you just search the Internet for a story from Indiana and you find works of art like this. The Hoosier state is quickly making inroads on such legendary states as Pennsylvania, Ohio, and of course perennial favorite Florida, as one of the most fucked up hilarious states in the union. This is truly one of the greatest story I’ve ever heard.
Seriously though, fuck Katniss Everdeen – a barbecue join in Muncie, Indiana is the REAL Hunger Games. Look, people are making a big deal about this and they need to calm down. We talkin about ribs here people. Ribs are fucking DELICIOUS. It’s not like we’re talkin bout grilled cheese or broccoli. When’s the last time you saw someone get stabbed over broccoli? Oh yea, never.
You know what the only surprising part about this story is? Sabrina Davis was intending on using a fork. I guess when you’re a fancy rib joint connoisseur you don’t use your hands to eat ribs. Also, do we really know if she was trying to stab her? I think a case could be made that she was trying to eat her.
There’s a lot of marketing possibilities here too. Remember the “Leggo my Eggo” commercials? Well this place can start running “Leggo my ribs before I stab your punk ass with a fork” campaign. Either that or, “Taste so good, make you wanna stab your Momma with a fork!!”
P.S. You’re really old if you remember this reference like I do:
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Look, any time you have a limited quantity of ribs, someone is going to get stabbed. It’s going to happen and we need to accept that. The question is what we do to reduce the damage.
7 Comment(s)
She’s “Hot” because she has as much bodily insulation as a walrus.
And cue Old Balls crying racism in 3… 2… 1…
I get that the headline is exuding sarcasm, but it reminds me of the accuracy – or lack thereof – often found in T&G headlines.
She has the same haircut as Al Sharpton
Look, any time you have a limited quantity of ribs, someone is going to get stabbed. It’s going to happen and we need to accept that. The question is what we do to reduce the damage.
It’s always funny until someone loses an eye or grows a baby arm…..
Is that the same woman that got proposed to crashing a wedding? I’m Confucius.