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I Could Watch Cincinnati Bengals Emasculate Johnny Manziel’s Cleveland Browns All Day

Johnny Manziel memes

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I could watch Johnny Manziel get emasculated like he did today every day for the rest of my life and love every minute of it:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – Johnny Manziel is going to have an extremely short NFL career. If you watched the New England Patriots run train on the Miami Dolphins today then you might’ve missed the greatest abortion on earth perform in Cleveland today.

The Cleveland Browns, who are still somewhat in the playoff hunt in the AFC for the first time since Christ was performing magic tricks, decided they would abandon their solidly mediocre quarterback who got them there – Brian Hoyer. Sure, he’s not spectacular, but at least he wouldn’t take a gigantic Cleveland dump all over himself like Johnny Rookie Bitch did today against the Cincinnati Bengals. 

The numbers don’t get much worse than this:

Score: Bengals 30, Browns 0.

Rushing/Passing First Downs: Bengals 22, Browns 3.

Third Down Efficiency: Bengals 7/14, Browns 1/10.

Johnny Rookie Bitch: 10/18, 80 yards, 0 touchdowns, 2 interceptions, 27.3 QB rating.

Just to put that in historical perspective, Marc Sanchez had a QB rating of 94.8 in the infamous “Butt Fumble” game in 2012. What makes it even better is that every single time he fucks up, and there will be many, many more fuck ups to come, we get to see someone like Ray Maualuga do the money sign right in his face:

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So many dingleberries picked up this clown in Fanduel today too. Thanks for the free money morons. There hasn’t been a more predictable outcome than the stinker JRB put up today. This idiot survived in college because Texas A&M had three NFL first round draft picks blocking for him. He played in an offense that was specifically designed to be involved in SEC shootouts. He was throwing to Mike Evans, who has already lit up the NFL for a terrible Tampa Bay Bucs team. As a result he got to run around in the pocket without a care in the world while his line blocked for him and Evans went up and got the ducks he threw.

Here’s what happens when you try to pull that shit in the NFL:

The second you put a pass rush on him he’s toast. He’ll try to run around and get cute like he did against Missouri and Ole Miss, but he’s gonna end up throwing interceptions and eventually getting carried off the field in a body bag. Welcome to the NFL. Bitch.

Special bonus – here’s the best Johnny Rookie Bitch memes from today:

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1 Comment(s)
  • Dick Scratcher
    March 7, 2019 at 8:54 am

    “Johnny Manziel is going to have an extremely short NFL career”

    Nailed it.

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