It’s clear that this is gonna be a thing now before the start of every NFL game:
Literally had no clue who this guy was. Didn’t even want to know his name. That’s why he did it. He wants you to Google him. This is how irrelevant nobodies are gonna become household names from now on. They’re all just mad that they didn’t think of this before Colin Kaepernick did. They saw how he went from being Blaine freaking Gabbert’s backup to having the best selling jersey in the NFL in one week. All you have to do is pretend to be oppressed and make yourself the center of attention while everyone else is acting like a mature adult.
They know it will work because they know the networks will stay focused on them. They could’ve shown hundreds of players and coaches, but they kept coming back to #54 because they know it will sell. It’s actually brilliant marketing as long as you don’t mind being a gigantic assbag on national television. It’s cool though because ESPN and the rest of the PC prize patrol will have your back. They’ll call you brave and you’ll get interviewed relentlessly and Shaun King will invite you over for milk and cookies.
Turtleboy was on WEEI this morning on the Kirk and Callahan show, and this was the point we made – when losers make political statements we should stop paying attention. If Cam Newton did this it would be one thing. He matters. When losers do it the networks should just stop paying attention because they’re only doing it it for the ratings. Last week some women’s soccer player started doing it and it made the news. WOMEN’S SOCCER!!! We’re talking about Goddamn WOMEN’S SOCCER!!! Don’t you get it? This is just what irrelevant athletes do to get attention now.
Anyway it turns out his name is Brandon Marshall. This makes sense for a couple reasons. When people Google “Brandon Marshall” or “Brandon Marshall NFL,” everyone knows who is gonna come up first. This guy:
Because when any NFL fan thinks “Brandon Marshall” they think of the perennial Pro-Bowl wide receiver. Seriously, Google image search for “Brandon Marshall NFL” right now. This assbag right here:
Doesn’t come up in the first 100 pictures. Not once. That will change in the next 48 hours. He will be Googled and talked about so many times and it will affect Google algorithms. He might even come up first now. A guy who hasn’t accomplished a fraction of what the real Brandon Marshall has as a player.
And guess where this slug rake went to college?
And irrelevant college that no one cares about. Guess who played QB there at the same time as him?
Of course this was before black lives mattered to Colin Kaepernick. I guess when no one pays attention to your big win over Utah State you have to do something to get the cameras to look at you.
Ya know which team is gonna have nobody kneeling down during the National Anthem? The New England Patriots. Because not only do we love America, we’re here to play football, not talk about politics. This is why we’re so blessed. Because we’re the only ones who don’t have to worry about this.
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