Nudniks

It Wouldn’t Be A Patriots Parade Without A Bunch Of Savages Beating The Shit Out Of Each Other To See Who Is King Douchebag 2019

 

It wouldn’t be a Patriots parade without a bunch of drunken hooligans Quincy (probably) ruining the day for children and families everywhere by acting like savages in the streets of Boston. We all remember the South Shore Sausage Queen from a few years back. For some reason these crotch creatures can’t handle their Busch Light and feel the need to ruin a good time for everyone else.

Philadelphia: “We have the most obnoxious, douchtastic fans in the country.”

Boston: “Hold my beer.”

Guarantee 80% of the people in that fight own at least one article of clothing that says “Saturdays are for the boys.”

Let’s go to the tale of the tape.

It begins with some Chad, who likely gets paid by the hour to move stones around at the quarry, hates life, wears sweatpants to church when he goes once a year, aims to one day own a house in Weymouth, and spends most Saturday nights getting drunk on Peach schnapps and crying about his ex-girlfriend, dog walking one of the 15 people in the fight who was wearing a Gronk jersey directly into a car.

He then immediately gets up and runs over to cheap shot some Peabody pork nugget, who of course was shirtless at this point, while his boy who likely still tells people about the two hitter he threw against Andovah in 2013, is sucker punching the pork nugget from behind.

Next thing you know Motel Beckham Jr. shows up as the token minority, and quickly gets a left hand jab to the face.

Then you can see #42, who is desperate to be accepted by the group and wants to prove that he is more more than just being the sober driver every weekend, pushing someone several inches taller from behind, but fails to knock him down.

After that it’s just an orgy of testosterone and blue balls fighting to establish who is King Douchebag of Parade Day 2019. Out of the madness appears Cornbread Flintstone, kicking a guy in the face so hard his shoe falls off, before putting his hood on over his head because he knows the cameras caught him committing a felony.

 

This is why I hate everyone between the ages of 18 and 25. Because they ruin everything. We can’t even have a parade out here that doesn’t turn into a World Star video because these savages can’t go out in public without causing a scene.

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10 Comment(s)
  • Ocasio-Cortez’s snatch
    February 6, 2019 at 1:18 pm

    Cornbread Flintstone is none other than Holbrook’s own Brian Fidler, son of Teamster John Fidler and Great grandson of mafia hit man Suitcase Fiddler. Good old Cornbread Fiddler got into a beef in Quincy last month over forty pounds of weed that left his buddy with a gunshot wound to the chest. John Fidler is that goof out of local 25 who beat a federal extortion beef two years ago. The patriarch, the late Suitcase Fiddler was sent in the 70s by “The Man” Raymond Patriaca to find and take care of mob rat Joe “The Animal” Barboza. Four generations of Charlestown white trash.

  • The angry taint
    February 6, 2019 at 12:15 pm

    One armed Sudanese children throw better punches than these idiots

  • David Portnoy
    February 6, 2019 at 1:51 am

    Ahhh my people…

  • HairyClamChowda
    February 5, 2019 at 8:48 pm

    Hey, did a couple of those guys in the video find that red sox banna in summerville on mcGrath Highway???

  • Maura Healy
    February 5, 2019 at 8:37 pm

    This is why I carry a weapon everywhere I go. I won’t be curb stomped by some white trash hood rat. 

  • Enjoy your bologna sandwich at SouthBay... heh heh
    February 5, 2019 at 8:07 pm

    Next TBS article.

    CAN YOU IDENTIFY ANY OF THE PERSONS IN THE DUCK BOAT PARADE BRAWL?

    Guarantee these ass hats will be identified within 24 hours. Drunken bums like these who kick people that are on the ground have made many enemies in life. Enemies that can’t wait to ID them for the Boston PD. Round em up and charge them. These drunks best call their one together family member who still tolerates their stupid drunk ass so they can bail them out and hopefully, that rational family member or friends is smart enough to hang up the phone… eat shit losers. Time served begins now… ha ha ha.

    Lets get cracking! Who are these drunk low lives assaulting people and fucking up our parade?

    • Bobby bones
      February 6, 2019 at 12:01 pm

      First off pickle puff they got jumped first and then the kid came back with a crew and stomped them back to Braintree 

  • Ray Caruth
    February 5, 2019 at 7:45 pm

    What a bunch of scum bags.

  • Lol
    February 5, 2019 at 6:36 pm

    I for one and not the least bit shocked, happened every fucking time.

    I got to see all kinds of dumbfuckery in Boston today. My vote for dumbfuck of the day goes to the guy in south station that power vomited into a trash can and then celebrated like Gostkowski just kicked a game winning field goal. Woooooo!!!!!!

    Im on the commuter rail to The Woo right Now and it’s chock full of drunken morons and looks like a frat house kegger with empties all over the place and vomit on the floor. Smells great in here, so glad the train is only going like 5 mph and in over an hour we are still in Wellesley. Outstanding!

    I never thought i would say this but i cant wait to get to Framingham so i can get off this ratchet express. I hate Framingham but its going to be the best place on earth when i get off and can get in my own car. They really need to do this shit on weekends to the folks that actually work dont suffer….

  • Ungawah
    February 5, 2019 at 5:18 pm

    Fucking stupid bastards. There isn’t enough brain power in the whole lot of em to find their way home. 5 bucks says half were from Brockton half were from Webdah/ Fall river… Fucking street cheetahs

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