Hoodrat Heroes

Manchvegas Gutter Pube Insists “I Can’t Get In Trouble” For Buying Food Stamps On Facebook, Has Several Google Trophies And Decided To Reproduce Again

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Bonus Food Stamp Friday blog coming at ya out of Manchvegas!

“I can’t get in trouble.”

Priceless. Usually when ratchets are buying or selling food stamps on Facebook the catastrophe crew comes out of the woodwork offering to hook them up. Very rarely do they warn them not to do this. But all this guy had was a bunch of people giving him really good advice and all he could say was, “



Josh Martineau is so Manchester it hurts.

Generally the people share the “I am living proof recovery works” Facebook filter, are living proof that recovery lasts all of 12 minutes.

Take a wild guess who his favorite bouncey ball team is…..

I swear to God, there’s gotta be a hoodbooger newsletter these slugpumps all subscribe to that specifically tells them to purchase flat brimmed Chicago Bulls hats, preferably with the sticker still on it.

Guess what his favorite brand of shoe is?

He doesn’t just want them Batman Jordan’s. He NEEDS to cop dem joints! Of course it’s easier to afford $300 shoes when you save money on your grocery bill by purchasing half priced food stamps off of junkboxes.

Shockingly this Manchester gutter pube has an assortment of Google trophies:

It doesn’t get much more Manchvegas than this mugshot:

Nevertheless he’s actively engaged in the civic process:

Reinstating fourth period lunch is the moral crisis of our generation.

Plus, all is forgiven because he saved France from the terrorists:

When he’s not busy selling food stamps, running from the cops, or skoping out the next pair of Jordan’s he’s gonna purchase you can find him doing really productive things, like signing Change.org petitions to free muh boi:

Or leaving comments about drug dealers, justifying their actions because “not everyone can do a 9 to 5 job.”

Oh, and good news……

Yup, a career deadbeat who buys food stamps on Facebook and occasionally gets into foot chases with the cops has decided to reproduce. It’s not his first child either:

Oh yea, he’s earned the right to lecture other men about not being real Dads. I’d vote for any politician who ran on a platform of mandatory sterilization for anyone who ever appeared on Turtleboy.

Anyway, remember this the next time a politician tells you that food stamp abuse is rare, or it hardly ever happens. Because we have no shortage of these stories and could probably write one every single day of the week if wanted to. But instead we save them for you on Friday because we know how much turtle riders love celebrating Food Stamp Friday!!

10 Comment(s)
  • Joe Bob
    March 4, 2018 at 6:35 pm

    Manchester seems to have a lot of losers per capita. Used to be a nice city, Irish, French, Greeks basically. Now, like most cities, forget about it.

  • Chip Striker
    March 3, 2018 at 5:56 pm

    Straight brim hats are for retards. They do not look good on anyone.

    Gangs are for pussies with straight brim hats who join gangs because they’re too lazy/stupid to joint the workforce instead.

  • Sloppy
    March 3, 2018 at 9:20 am

    Tribalism and the uniforms thereof never cease to amaze me.
    The flat-brimmed Bulls hat is a self-denoted scarlet letter for white trash pieces of shit who are, apparently, quite proud to identify as white trash pieces of shit.
    It’s kind of like the wearing of pajamas in the supermarket; you’re basically a peacock flaunting a plumage that screams “thanks for paying for all my groceries, you working, tax-paying chumps”.

    • ElJefe72
      March 3, 2018 at 9:49 am

      Sad but true. 

  • Brian Albrecht
    March 3, 2018 at 7:29 am

    hey merrimack turtle boy. NICE CUNT

  • March 3, 2018 at 1:53 am

    I don’t know if you know this but most people who wear a bulls cap do so because they think they are in a gang, or at least know someones whos ‘affiliated’ – its how they identify whos an ally. Chicago is gang hub capital for anyone not born in California. They also may hear the death toll that resonates with Chicago and use said cap to project how tough they are, if they have visited the windy city or not.

    • Hoyt
      March 3, 2018 at 1:52 pm

      You just made that up. It does not even make sense.  The Bulls hat is a fashion thing, not a gang thing. 

      Unless you’re in Boston where the Bulls hat (or Bulls attire in general) represents the “Norfolk Street”, a Street Gang in Mattapan. They have claimed the Bulls. 

      You think kids around here try to identify with Chicago?  Jesus Christ. 

      It’s like saying they wear Jordan’s to show affiliation with a gang which is not true. However, in Boston, Adidas has always been the choice sneaker, especially with Intervale Street. When Daryl Whiting came from NY and took over Orchard Park in the late 80’s, you knew who they were because they wore Nikes as opposed to Adidas. After the NYC boys were ran off,  Intervale Street enemies began to wear only Nikes as they refused to wear Adidas like Intervale. 

      Anyway, shove your uneducated theory of Chicago gangs and Bulls hats around here. 

  • Wwy
    March 3, 2018 at 12:47 am

    Oh it’s Jew Friday when everyone plays the Jew card,using tax dollars for Americans is ok but not for the oven dwelling Jews in Israel they get 3500 a month from u.s tax dollars,kikes have always been the best fuel and beggars.

    • Safe space
      March 3, 2018 at 11:40 am

      It’s Saturday dipshit. You should have from now until sundown before they resume succeeding at pretty much everything.

  • Chicago Bulls Spokesman
    March 2, 2018 at 11:46 pm

    On behalf of the chicago bulls I would like to offer our full endorsement of anyone who chooses to show their support for our great team and great city. You truly exemplify the greatness of chicago.

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