Social Justice Warriors

Missouri Protesters Are Upset You’re Worried About Paris Victims And Not Them

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A lot of people’s minds are on the terrible terrorist attacks that went down in Paris tonight, which is apparently rubbing the protesters in Missouri the wrong way. Because we’re not paying attention to them. And it’s simply unacceptable not to pay attention to them at all times, because they’re the real victims here. Let’s check out the magical world of Twitter…

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Yup. Equal. 150 dead = hurt feelings from microaggressions. 

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I know, how could we forget about the VERY serious things going on in Missouri? Our deepest apologies. 

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Yea, no one cared about Missouri. What was even going on there anyway? Haven’t seen it in the news or anything. 

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Good point. A white kid who lived hours away from campus in his mother’s basement wrote a threat on Yik Yak. It’s basically the same thing as armed gunmen systematically murdering civilians and suicide bombers blowing up restaurants. 

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Well ya see, the news wanted to cover you friend Jonathan Butler’s imaginary hunger strike, but they couldn’t get to him. Ya know, because you guys were guarding his safe zone like your life depended on it. 

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I heard another kid in Missouri had his feelings hurt today. And here we are worrying about innocent people being massacred. Silly us. 

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Yea, all those people who died in Missouri. Like, ummmmmm, what’s his face….well, Jonathan Butler almost died because he purposely chose not to eat food. That counts. 

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Never thought of it that way. I don’t know how that campus will ever rebound from that poop swastika. 

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Yea, the hurt feelings of Americans are much more important than some silly foreigners dying. American feelings > European lives. 

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We don’t know the races of any of the deceased in Paris tonight. However, if just one of them is black then that gives them one more dead black person than at the University of Missouri this year. Other than that her logic is foolproof. 

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“Fuck Paris.” SMH. “Fuck Paris.” This is the face of the student movement in Missouri. 

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Yea, she’s not taking anything away from all the victims in Paris, but she’s gonna compare you to a bunch of overprivileged lucky sperm at Missouri who had their feelings hurt this week. But don’t worry, she’s not taking away from the victims in Paris at all.

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Yea media, how dare you get distracted by all the blood, gore, and terrorism in one of the world’s most iconic and historic cities. Don’t you know there are kids who are being victimized by microaggressions in the great plains AS WE SPEAK!!!????

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Senseless tragedy taking place overseas? Better get on my iPhone and remind the world that it’s their fault for not respecting my safe space. 

And many  more….

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So as you can see, there WAS a terrorist attack this week. A terrorist attack on FEELINGS!!!!! The worst kind of terror imaginable. If the Missouri protesters were in Paris tonight they would’ve told those terrorists to respect their safe spaces.

I don’t even know what to say. Such a tragic event. There are a never ending supply of shitty people who have zero problem killing innocent civilians in the name of their God. I’ve never held a gun before and I don’t really have a desire to, but I don’t know how anyone walking the streets of Paris could ever feel safe ever again after this without having something on them to defend themselves. These people give zero fucks and they kill indiscriminately. The worst part is that you can never get rid of them because they’re like weeds.

But I guess in the grand scheme of things it’s not a big deal because kids at Yale are having their feelings hurt by Halloween costumes, and Missouri is still recovering from an invisible poop swastika. We’ve known this whole time that these protesters are narcissistic children throwing a hissy fit over nothing. But now we know they’re also human garbage devoid of any sort of perspective or world view. Can’t wait until they grow up and realize what assholes they all were during their college years.




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23 Comment(s)
  • D Mastro
    November 15, 2015 at 7:46 pm

    When you exaggerate your facts with lies. Skip class, fail to take exams but are selling t-shirts and partying. What the hell do you the think public is gong to think. Obama the MOST Divisive president ever in History. Your Americans first and black second Stop playin and do your work, graduate and get a job so you can pay your share. Like the rest of us. WTF

  • Um... What?
    November 14, 2015 at 10:45 pm


  • Drylaw
    November 14, 2015 at 9:38 pm

    , Isis is intolerance, ignorance and evil rolled up into one smelly ball of jihadi shit. These girls that are bitching would be their sex slaves and the guys executed. This is the problem with college kids and most young people, their pathetic whiny bullshit is unimportant. Mommy and daddy lied to you, you aren’t that brilliant, handsome or special. The world owes them nothing, not even a hole in the ground when you die. Join the human race and try some charity, compassion and humanity for the Parisians.

  • Publius
    November 14, 2015 at 6:30 pm

    F the campus fascists. The modern world is once again under attack and they whine. F campus fascists cluding the racist BLM.

  • White Lives Matter
    November 14, 2015 at 3:35 pm

    Despicable. Prayers to the white victims in Paris.

  • Del Griffith
    November 14, 2015 at 2:17 pm

    Microaggressions, subliminal racism, transgressive bullshit, blah, blah, blah. Words established by those who feel they are superior and smarter than they actually are. Waaaah, look at me! I NEED my “safe zone” where my feelings won’t get hurt. Here’s a thought, enlist in the military and reap the benefits of the GI Bill to pay for your education!

  • Chris From Georgia
    November 14, 2015 at 10:47 am

    There are kids in high school and middle school that exhibit more maturity than these self absorbed little twits! Utterly disgusting!

  • Sonya Conner's Hairy Fupa
    November 14, 2015 at 9:44 am

    I opened the Turtleboy homepage today KNOWING that there would be an article about Missouri sympathizers being pissed about Paris. I’m not in the twittersphere, so I could only guess what baloney was being thrown about.
    I KNEW IT. And it wath confirmed.
    This means that (1) they are predictable, and (2) Turtleboy does his job so damn well.

  • juror seven
    November 14, 2015 at 9:29 am

    Well it will be interesting to see what happens tonight when Mizzu plays BYU at home. A moment of silence for the Paris victims? Perhaps the black power salute for the “great victory” by the whining fools that think they are reshaping the social order.

  • ItsAllABadDream
    November 14, 2015 at 9:06 am

    And some day those losers will have their student loans forgiven. Absolutely disgusting. Those tweets show just how privileged those assholes are, whether they admit it or not.

  • Vekdqec
    November 14, 2015 at 1:28 am

    This infuriates me to the core. A$$holes cant think of anyone but themselves. A poop swastika is apparently worthy of the same acknowledgement as 150 innocent people losing their lives to ruthless terrorists.. I’m a grown man, and I shed a tear tonight as I finally realized that this upcoming generation cares only about fighting phantom personal vendettas. “150 innocent dead? Who cares? And wait, it happened in another country? Not my problem.”

  • Steven Stover
    November 14, 2015 at 1:08 am

    No girls to stick my broadband device in.

  • Wwy
    November 14, 2015 at 1:05 am

    I thought France was illegally bombing Syria,killing many civilians,gaza last summer 2000 innocent civilians.hmm. Every human bleeds the same color but no one in America is smart enough to understand that yet I hope America,France,Britain,Israel,and other nations led by idiots grow up. I know tb readers aren’t the brightest but have to start somewhere.

    • The Philistine
      November 14, 2015 at 8:42 am

      You agree with half the postings here. You just want to disassociate whenever it suits you?

      • Wwy
        November 15, 2015 at 12:34 am

        So France wasn’t ILLEGALLY bombing Syria,or are you Boston strong?

    • The Philistine
      November 14, 2015 at 8:45 am

      This also has nothing to do with the nationalistic campaign of groups such as PLO. This new terrorism wants apocalypse, not a free nation for Arabs in Gaza and the West Bank.

    • JoeMomma
      November 14, 2015 at 10:37 am

      If you hate America that much you do know you are free to leave, right?

      • Wwy
        November 15, 2015 at 12:31 am

        No America is mine as it is yours,I would never steal another people’s land to make my own rules that’s an Israeli thing,I know people get confused Israel is not part of the 50 states. Remember 9/11 never forget.thx bibi.

        • Finnish Goalie
          November 15, 2015 at 11:13 am

          You’re an Indigenous Tribal member then?

  • oskar
    November 14, 2015 at 12:21 am

    gather a bunch of tweets and call it the face of the student movement in missouri. is it really? or is it a bunch of random tweets from the area?

    • Finnish Goalie
      November 14, 2015 at 9:39 am

      Is it all inclusive? No.

      But c’mon man, on your worst day, would you say something like that in public or in mixed company?

      If social media is the new means of communication, then this is true thoughts being expressed, and it is self absorbed to a truly frightening level.

  • Wormtown Refugee
    November 14, 2015 at 12:00 am

    Yup, just goes to show what a great college education can buy you in terms of global knowledge, world events, history, and an understanding wider than your fucking Facebook page.

    Missouri sucks, go away.

    Je suis Paris.

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