Misunderstood Suburban Goth Teenagers Make Hilarious Music Video Entitled “Shut The Fuck Up”

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Wanna watch a disturbing and terrible video to get your weekend started? Here ya go:

LOL. Some things never change. No matter how much we evolve as a society there will always be a group of suburban white kids at any given high school who don’t know how to handle puberty so they die their hair black, buy some skinny jeans, and complain about how terrible life is. Back in the 90’s we just called these them “goth kids.” They wore capes to school and played Magic in homeroom. On the weekends they went to the Espresso bar and sucked mud off each other’s toes. Today they make music videos and call themselves “Emo.”

This is why Turtleboy Jr. is gonna be playing sports year round. Because if you’re not playing sports then your odds of ending up being the weird goth kid increases exponentially. That’s just a scientific fact.

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But it brings up an interesting point – what do you do if your kid turns into a goth kid? Because you still have to love them, as much as you hate the person they’ve become. Embracing their differences isn’t an option. No way as a parent I can ever come to terms with this:

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Look, I understand that not everyone is an athlete, but there are other options besides becoming the weird kid with skinny jeans and a cape. You can do band, theater, student council, or a number of other activities. You could even become a nerd, get straight A’s, and generally have a happier outlook on life. Because these kids are basically desperate for an identity. They don’t want to be ignored so they have to do something to make themselves stand out. And apparently making a video entitled, “Shut the fuck up” is how they do that.

Love some of the lyrics though:

If you didn’t notice, bitch I don’t give a fuck. I’ll punch you in the face, cuz you’re just such a cunt.”

Deep stuff right there. But is she really going for the bad ass look? I mean, sure she’s got a bat:

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But at the same time, she’s not really hardcore enough:

Fuck you bitch. I’m a princess. You’re not the type of girl who will ever make my friends list.”

Sorry hunny, no one is scared of a princess. You either have to be bad ass or a princess. You can’t be both.

I’ll fuck you bitch and leave your ass penniless. On Facebook my popularity is endless. Bitch I’m better than you and your boyfriend’s a loser. He spends all his time watching porn on the computer.”

I remember high school. When telling people that they watch porn was an insult. Ahh, the good ol’ days.

Gotta give these kids credit for having the black kid in the background though:

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See, they’re diverse!!!

The worst part is when adults encourage them:

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Oh for fucks sake…..

“Expressing themselves” is just an excuse that morons give to justify shitty behavior. They have no reason to be this angry. They’re just teenagers with too much time on their hands who probably get bad grades in school and aren’t going to college. By telling them that they’re expressing themselves, you’re encouraging their behavior. What you should be doing is shaming them until they get so embarrassed that they act like a normal human being.

Oh well, life is hard as a middle class teenager in the wealthiest country on earth. Some things never change.



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25 Comment(s)
  • Finnish Goalie
    April 25, 2016 at 8:56 am

    • FiestyLawyerLady
      April 25, 2016 at 10:44 am

      The fact that I watched this entire video proves I have the ability to be entertained by even the most simple things.

  • FiestyLawyerLady
    April 23, 2016 at 4:24 pm

    It’s nice to see Turtleboy back to doing what he loves the most. Ragging on teenagers! I’m thoroughly disgusted that this blog doesn’t win world wide recognition and awards.

    • FiestyLawyerLady
      April 23, 2016 at 6:04 pm

      ^ This loser again. Been a few days. How are you? I have to say at this point I am sincerely flattered that you’re still following my shadow. Thanks sweety!

      • ProfessorM
        April 23, 2016 at 9:28 pm

        I know! You must be flattered! I antagonized it for a day or two and all I got was an incoherent comment about how my class must be about “having bleach breath”…. I’m a little insulted! Must be because you are so feisty, lol… By the way… I tried looking vokeStache up… Couldn’t find it anywhere!

        • FiestyLawyerLady
          April 24, 2016 at 1:48 am

          I was hoping you realized that wasn’t me! I’m way too witty to say something that stupid.

        • FiestyLawyerLady
          April 24, 2016 at 1:49 am

          I also still don’t know why a voke stache is even a thing. I always called it a mexistache. Lol…

          • BobnMic
            April 24, 2016 at 1:53 am

            Hey there koo koo head.

  • Rich
    April 23, 2016 at 11:26 am

    Now I can’t get that “song” out of my head……..

  • Red
    April 23, 2016 at 9:37 am

    TB: have you seen who’s appearing in a local Toyota TV spot displaying some fine, fine acting talent?

  • Crumps
    April 23, 2016 at 8:37 am

    “Sorry hunny, no one is scared of a princess. You either have to be bad ass or a princess. You can’t be both.”


    • Finnish Goalie
      April 23, 2016 at 8:58 am

      But she’d still need a Gabrielle.

  • Workingclasshero
    April 23, 2016 at 12:40 am

    I have had long hair since the day I left Saint Johns a million years ago. I have one guestion. What is with just letting your hair hang down in front of your eyes? That shit would piss me off all day!

  • Joe Max
    April 22, 2016 at 8:28 pm

    Made me laugh anyways. Looks like they watched ” Clockwork Orange ” too !

  • ProfessorM
    April 22, 2016 at 6:09 pm

    I had to click onto the Facebook link to get the video to play, and I’m sure glad that I did… The comments from the people who actually know these kids were funnier than the video itself!!

  • Farfingr Lou
    April 22, 2016 at 5:36 pm

    Does anyone remember Exit 13?

    Did musical skills stop John Lydon or Henry Rollins?

    So this band needs someone who can write, and some mentorship, and a fanatical mob of fans.

    • Ras Babo
      April 23, 2016 at 8:17 am

      Yes, Exit 13. Then they changed the name to just “Exit” as Exit 13 was too uncool or something! Spliff and the Boatriders.

  • Jo
    April 22, 2016 at 5:33 pm

    I didn’t watch the video bit that girl is cute

    • Ugh
      April 23, 2016 at 10:45 pm


  • WormtownorBust
    April 22, 2016 at 4:16 pm

    Skinny jeans and Peppermint Patty haircuts need to be banned. NOW.

  • Grimm
    April 22, 2016 at 4:14 pm

    For what it’s worth, the goth kids hung out at Java Hut, E-Bar was more of a punk venue.

    • IgnoranceBreedsIgnorance
      April 22, 2016 at 4:29 pm

      I went to many a show at the E-bar. I was so sad when it closed and we were forced to go to the Commercial Street Cafe or the upstairs at The Palladium. But the E-bar had so many different music genres. My personal favorite being “rap-core.” Google Eastcide. Ahhhhhh, the good ol’ days.

      • Grimm
        April 22, 2016 at 4:42 pm

        Haha YES Eastcide! Lest we forget Chillum and 7 Hill Psychos?

        • IgnoranceBreedsIgnorance
          April 22, 2016 at 6:23 pm

          And Shed and Rawhead Rex. The list could go on indefinitely. It’s also where Staind got its start.

          ‘Cause we all do crime just like we all do time….I will scream this in your face FIFTY SEVEN TIMESSSSS!’

          Okay…enough reminiscing.

        • Mightandglory
          May 1, 2016 at 8:30 pm

          I still listen to 7hp all the time 🙂

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