Follow @TurtleboyNews on Twitter by clicking here.
Follow Turtleboy on Instagram by clicking here.
Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at [email protected] for more information.
If you like free speech and want to support what we’re doing, feel free to donate to the Turtle fund:
Hey fam – if you’d like to support Turtleboy and what we do here, feel free to hit the donate button at the top. We basically have to run this site like a Bernie Sanders campaign now since we’ve been blacklisted by Google and Facebook, due to the fact that rabid SJWs keep reporting our posts. Getting blacklisted by Google is a death sentence for most websites, since it’s much harder to monetize. And we all know the damage Facebook has done. We’re never going to stop fighting for free speech, but in the meantime the best way for turtle riders to fight back is to donate to the cause. Without you people none of this is possible. We love you all.
Hey there party turtles, let’s get ready to rock!
Ok you guys, I’m friggin’ conflicted here. See this blog is largely about a racial slur and by now, y’all know how I feel about racial slurs. This is a new one, which is actually an old one just spelled backwards and introduced to us by this awful New Bedford woman.
You’re probably as confused as I first was. Here’s a handy thing to help you realize what the slur is.
Oh, sweet weeping baby Jesus, even that definition in itself is racist. I have no words. Yeah, I know that we all know that’s a fucking lie and I have many words, but they mostly start with C and make Jesus make defeated puppy dog eyes at me so I’ll have to abstain. Gail Marie Lack-Of-Melaninson has done enough damage.
Now, no one seems to be quite sure just what she was reacting to in the most ratchet, yet inventive way ever, but I gotta give it to someone named Bizz Chopo for…introducing, subjecting, eye raping (?) us with this next level mean word for black people.
We all know that about a billion fake hate crimes and other bullshit pop up every day at this point, but that’s a steaming pile of evidence this NB scumbucket, who I’m assuming smells like curdled milk and lost hope, left on the internet. Because that’s totally fine and no one will ever know she’s a half wit who feels comfortable insulting a race, but not comfortable to go full, balls to the wall racist. So, she’s an even bigger pussy than I first thought.
Originally I thought this was a big misunderstanding and possibly even Russian hackers because she totally cares about at least 5 causes as seen by her selection of Facebook filters.
She seems perfectly stable and not fucking nuttier than a jock strap either…
Super glad she’s surrounded by people will talk sense into her!
Talking to and about your cat as if it’s a person and/or baby is super normal, too.
Nothing abnormal about whatever the hell is going on here, either…
Lets keep moving and ignore every red flag here, shall we? OK…
When shes not rocking the Hello Kitty look, she appears to have that “rode hard, put away wet and then shot up with penicillin” style on muffuggin’ lock, y’all.
Diane Kelly, eat your drunken, hopped up on cat drugs heart out!
She likes to spend her spare time when not being Purr Cat Cafe Lady Lite (trademark) by painting “owls” on rocks for whatever reason.
That first one looks like a constipated gingerbread man, the second like two eggs and a piece of bacon on a shingled, dilapidated roof, and the third appears to be considering suicide. Dude, just do it. If there’s any justice anywhere, you’ll still make it into heaven.
This one is “simple”…
Noooooo shit, fuckwad! Special as a window licking, short bus rider who left his helmet at home. Wow, just wow. I’m known as The Owl Lady around my town because everything I own is all about owls, my bitch of a mother passed that down to me so it’s been a lifelong love… And this deplorable just fucking ruined them for me. A racist, ragged, raging twat boxing KKK kangaroo from New fucking Bedford just ruined my favorite thing. WTF lady?
You know what? I am white as fuck, but my grandfather wasn’t. Black as the ace of spades, he was. He told me when I was young to not give words like this power, because that’s how hate wins and gains its power. I don’t like using racial slurs even while quoting someone else because despite showing a brave face, not letting on and keeping his cool, I knew how much just hearing that shit hurt him. He was pretty stoked with my mother marrying a white guy because he figured that I would be “washed out” (his exact words) enough to pass for white and not have to deal with the bullshit he did, and he was right. Just sucks that he figured that it was better for my mother to hopefully dilute a race to make sure I had a shot, but his view was of that of a guy who got with a white chick in 1950’s West Virginia so it was a little bit skewed.
Later in my granddaddy’s life, he began to have zero fucks left and instead of just letting people get away with being hateful pricks who hide behind words, he eventually gave them what for as only he could. If he were here today, he’d have the perfect thing to say and would shut this owl mangling, tattered old white power wonder bitch right down. It would be something to the effect and having to do with kicking her cracker teeth in and sending her useless poon out to pasture, being as dried up and full of cobwebs as it must be. But he’s not here, so… Someone has to do it.
But please, feel free to donate to her GoFundMe for her cat.
Because it’s always a great idea to have a really sick animal that you can’t afford to take care of as your service animal. That’s super fair to that poor cat who has to deal with an asshole like you already, make his pitiful pussy life be all about your seizures when battling thyroid problems and diabeetus.
I’m sure all that cash went to helping her service cat who’s sick with everything and sees the only vet in New Bedford who doesn’t take credit (like she has any) and free/low cost services that she’s fully aware of don’t exist at all, anywhere. I’m totally sure, but I could be wrong.
Let’s just take one last look at her artistic prowess… You know when an “artist” hasn’t had a good old fashioned dicking in a while because their “art” will begin to seem overtly sexual… Like peen and little swimmer shaped animals of some kind.
And in the words of Archer “phrasing”…
It all makes sense now. It all just came together. I’m sorry granddaddy, I will never live up to your burn factor, but I’m still trying. Because this crackah ass ho could probably feed herself forever off the crabs she finds in her cave of misery, but we all know damn well she wouldn’t know how to cook them up. Wouldn’t even use Old Bay seasoning….
I love you, white folks. Just paying homage to the Duke Of Dirty Old Man, Granddaddy Vance who would have been 99 years old today. And verbally whoopin’ this chick’s ass right now like only he could. I’m gonna go imagine his reaction to the GoFundMe issues these days and laugh until Mr. Manchester sends me to the crossword factory for a “vacation”.
Lemme know what’s up [email protected] or on Twitter @MTurtlette