New Hampshire Chudstuffer Announces On Facebook That He’s Out Of Crystal Meth, Asks Friends To Smoke Him Up, Defriends Anyone Who Comments Without Offering Crystal Meth
Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.
Every once in a while you need to feel better about yourself. That’s why we like to share stories about ratchets and slugpumps doing their thing on Facebook. Because it will make you realize that despite your struggles, life could be a lot worse. So, if you’re ever feel like life isn’t working out the way you thought it would, just remember this – you could be living in Dover, NH asking people on Facebook if they can smoke you up with crystal meth:
Brilliant move by a brilliant man:
Some people told James Adams that this was not a wise thing to do. But he made a strong counterpoint:
Yea guys, chill the fuck out. He only smokes crystal meth one or two times a week. And everyone knows there’s nothing wrong with crystal meth in moderation. Does this look like the kind of guy who has a problem with crystal meth?
Nope. Winners only.
And guess what chumps? If you’re not commenting about where and when you will be meeting up with him to smoke crystal meth, he ain’t trying to hear what you have to say:
Look, James Adams is a very busy guy. He doesn’t have time for these silly suggestions. Either you got the crystal, or you don’t. If you need him, he’ll be showing off the results of his successful Beachbody campaign with some mirror selfies.
James Adams is a reasonable man. If you don’t have the crystal, that’s OK. But you better come back with an offer about “dropping to lower grade if you got salts to sell”
Not sure what that means since Turtleboy does not speak Junkienese. All I know is this man right here drives a hard bargain, and isn’t gonna be suckered into no low grade salts.
He does kind of make a good point here, if you insert your own periods and attempt to speak in English:
He’s 1,000% right about the Facebook names. I’ve always said this. We’ve busted so many people by things they’ve posted on Facebook. But in reality all they really have to say is, “that’s a fake account that someone made to try to smear my good name.” How do they know you’re really the person behind it? I can create a fake Facebook page for anyone I want. Nothing on Facebook is actually real. At least it would be hard to prove that in a court of law.
But unfortunately for James Adams he’s in the Turtleboy Court of Law, where anyone with a flat brimmed hat looking for crystal meth is assumed to be guilty before proven innocent.
We urge you to support the Turtleboy Sponsors by doing business with them. Without them none of this is possible. Click on any of them to check out their sites or Facebook pages.