Boy meets girl on online dating site. Girl develops feelings, then receives violent threat’s from boy’s psychotic junkbox wife over the internet. It’s a classic 2019 love story, and this one blew up faster and messier than Abi’s bowels after a 2 day Taco Bell binge.
Meet Kyle VanSteenburg.
If your first thought is, “Damn, that is one effeminate looking dude!”, you won’t be surprised at all to learn that he belongs to the branch of the military best known for voluntarily going out to sea with nothing but other men around for company while dressed like Shirley Temple.
Those Navy boys look so fabulous! Kyle loves seamen!
Kyle recently met a woman online, and they hit it off. Shortly after meeting, he admits he is in an “open marriage” to a woman who makes his life fucking miserable. Because all married guys on online dating sites are in “open marriages” with shrews, duh.
So the fledgling relationship shifts from potential lovers to more of a patient/therapist, because that’s what getting involved with a girly hot mess of a man will get you. It continues this way, until his wife Punky Spewster catches wind.
If suboxone had a face, this would be it. That’s what happened to Rainbow Brite; she grew up, developed a crippling addiction to crack cocaine and married a philandering closet homosexual sailor.
And so meth-addled Cyndi Lauper reacted as any totally sane, classy individual would – just kidding. She went full ratchet by threatening this other woman, and her children, openly, all over Facebook.
She seems nice. Here’s a tip – as soon as you use “mental illness” as an excuse to be a total piece of shit, it becomes invalid and the rest of the world no longer gives a flying fuck. I don’t care if you’ve been clinical diagnosed with cancer of the clitoris – you don’t go around making threats against other people. Calm it down, methzilla.
I can understand being upset because your cuck of a husband decided to go prowling the internet looking for unsuspecting ladies to play hide the salami with behind your back. That’s upsetting. But maybe, just maybe, your unfettered blind rage would be best channeled towards the real culprit here – him. Because some strange chick on the internet owes you nothing at all, but he sort of does. Your behavior sure seems unbecoming of a serviceman’s wife, but he doesn’t seem to think so, now does he?
Yeah, she seems like a real angel, you sniveling beta male. Lots of angelic wives and mothers pull the shit she does, public pity parties and dangerous behavior and all.
I don’t know if she likes to ride Diego’s magic brown bus to happy town or not, but do you know what effectively cuts 40 pounds off in 3 months? Replacing all the blood in your body with sweet, sticky black tar heroin does. It’s anyone’s guess really, but one thing is certain – this bitch be crazy.
Check this crazy broad out, suicide threats and attention seeking bullshit galore! She appears to operate in three speeds only.
Pathetic and so, so, SO sad, you guys:
Pathetic and desperately slutty:
No, Amy, that’s not what mental illness looks like. That’s what cripplingly low self esteem and a tall glass of Hep-C looks like.
And just batshit crazy and completely unhinged:
I can tell you why nobody responded to this mentally unstable thotpocket’s sympathy snapchat-fest: because she didn’t want to die. She wanted attention. I almost feel bad for the husband who is stuck in what appears to be the emotional roller coaster ride from Hell – I’d probably want to cheat, too. Then again, apparently this is his version of an “angel”, so clearly he’s fucked up in the head, too. Something their friends appear to confirm.
The real victims here are the poor innocent children they have stuck in their parent’s trashtastic mess, and it’s shocking to see they even have children, considering Mommy Methmouth has also previously been arrested for child abuse.
So that’s good. She seems really stable and not dangerous to children at all, good thing DCF hasn’t intervened, amirite?
This is just a great example of why online dating is a terrible idea. Go out to the bar and pick up drunken strangers – at least you can see what you’re getting ahead of time. You never know what kind of weirdo is sitting behind the screen – or what kind of dumpsterslug sociopath trash monster they may be married to.