Revere Beach Brawl Savages Prove That Revere Is Dumpier Than Worcester

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Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook – Police arrested 9 people after a massive fight broke out at Revere Beach.

Dozens of police cruisers from surrounding areas made their way to the beach at about 6:15 p.m. Sunday in response to the large-scale fight that resulted in several road closures.

State Police Lt. Dan Richard says those involved in the fight were “pushing and shoving and throwing bottles.” He says the bottles were likely plastic soda bottles.

Five girls under the age of 18, three boys under the age of 18 and one adult male were arrested. No names were released.

Police say between 100 and 200 people were at the scene when the fight broke out among several individuals.

There are conflicting reports about how the fight began.

According to State Police, a group of people were drinking, being unruly to nearby families and possibly smoking marijuana on the beach. When troopers went to confiscate the alcohol, police say that things got unruly and at least one person jumped on the back of a trooper. 

Revere Police previously said that the brawl began with girls fighting and then escalated when their boyfriends got involved.

Witnesses tell FOX25 that the fight actually broke out between the young people and police when police tried to confiscate a backpack with drugs.

Revere was one of the 21 towns and cities that we scientifically proved was a bigger dump than Worcester. Everything in Revere looks like this:


It has the misfortune of being jammed between Chelsea, East Boston, and Lynn, so there was little hope for Revere to begin with. Revere does have a nice beach area, but because of it’s location it has slowly but surely turned into the Bennett pool of Eastern MA. And right on cue yesterday when the weather got warm, all hell broke loose. There are a lot of crappy videos you can find of the muff sandwiches that police had to deal with, all of them shot vertically for some reason. This is a good one. I recommend fast forwarding to the 5:30 mark to see what these cops were dealing with:

Thanks for the video and the report Mike — Main mod

Posted by Revere Scanner on Sunday, May 10, 2015

This little McMuffin

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was especially pleasant, wasn’t she? Tons of normal people yell “shut the fuck up bitch” directly at a police officer. She’s probably just really stressed out about taking the SAT’s. I guess she was all fired up because her friend was arrested, and started screaming about police brutality:

This ain’t even right… Smfh

Posted by Imer Ortiz on Sunday, May 10, 2015

Poor girl. Now she’ll never make it to the National Honor Society induction ceremony.

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There is a 98% chance this girl is from Lynn, a 99% chance she will reproduce within five years, and a 100% chance that you and I will foot the bill. It’s science.

But I’d like to give this girl a little piece of advice, since most likely she’ll be arrested many, many more times in the coming years. Arrests go a lot more smoothly and hurt a lot less when you’re not jumping up and down like a savage. You’re going to have to get used to handcuffs, since you obviously are incapable of carrying on as a normal person in a civilized society. So you might as well learn how to make the experience slightly less painful for yourself.

Oh yea, and you’ll NEVER guess what this girl goes by on Facebook:

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Jazlyn “ThePlugg Savage” Montana. Her fucking nickname is “Savage.” You can’t make this shit up people. Next time Spanky or the hippies complain about our use of this word, just point out that this is what many of them prefer to be called.

Another thing that these geniuses love to do when people start calling them out on their savagery is use the “you weren’t there” defense:

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Yea, we didn’t witness it. Except for the video. We all saw that though didn’t we? This is what I like to call the “Gordon Davis” defense. He’s the one who is insisting that the video of the Kelley Square blockade somehow won’t stand up in court. LOL. Silly hippies.

Turns out I was wrong about being from Lynn. She’s actually from Boston. Should’ve seen that one coming:

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Newton South? LOL. Nothing I love more then sending some of these kids that the hippies in Newton and Cambridge pretend to care about, directly into their schools to cause mayhem. Somewhere a Boston Public Schools teacher is saying, “Thank God for METCO.”

Now most of us look at a baby picture on Facebook and say, “he’s so cute,” or something to that nature. Not my girl Savage Montana though. Here’s what this lovely girl had to say about a picture of her baby nephew that she posted:

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This little guy will be reading at a fourth grade level by the time he’s crawling.

The comments from these little McMuffins were the same kind of comments we’ve seen when that Burncoat kid was arrested for brining a loaded gun to school:

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Oh shit – INTERNET BADASS!!! He totally would’ve knocked that cop off his feet. Because this guy right here DEFINITELY has the physical capability to knock down a well-trained, well-armed, and much larger police officer:

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But hey, he takes selfies with guns

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and cash-money

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so obviously he’s a pretty legit badass.

Then of course there are the people chiming in with this:

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I’ve come to the conclusion that no matter what you do, there were always be a group of Internet mcmuffins who will demand that you be freed. Figures Savage Montana’s other nickname is diamond. She’s a real gem alright.

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Yea, she didn’t deserve to be cuffed, despite being involved in a gigantic melee in which police officers were asaulted. That ain’t right yo.

There’s two things that this proves:

  1. Revere is clearly a bigger dump than Worcester.
  2. These savages all need to be locked up and kept away from normal society because everything they touch turns to shit. This whole thing started when these livestock started harassing FAMILIES and drinking 40’s on the beach.  I propose we put all of them into a designated area and give them ankle bracelets that produce an electric shock if they ever try to go to a place where normal people congregate.

Boom. Problem solved.

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17 Comment(s)
  • Garoppolo Fan
    May 12, 2015 at 9:07 pm

    Well there was that strip club brawl we had a while back with multiple stabbings…

  • Devils Mouthpiece
    May 12, 2015 at 1:36 pm

    Bet that chick shags like a minx!

  • btag
    May 12, 2015 at 12:13 pm

    The bennet pool reference made me lol in a library

  • Devils Mouthpiece
    May 12, 2015 at 9:24 am

    Revere does have one good thing over Worcester. Kelley’s on Revere Beach. Best clam plate around, bar none… Not to be confused with any of the Kelly’s in Jordan’s furniture. Same restaurant, completely different quality. Frankly, they suck.

    Just don’t go in the water at revere beach, never know when you might meet up with some medial waste floating by.

  • JoeMomma
    May 12, 2015 at 5:55 am

    METCO—-Sending Boston’s garbage to the burbs for over 40 years.

  • BobnMic
    May 12, 2015 at 2:14 am

    This is how we are going start our fucking summer there Revere personnel? After the Goddam winter we just had? Wow. Time to party like rock stars and enjoy the better weather rather than being crazy people. Fucking get a clue…

  • RSoxGuy
    May 11, 2015 at 10:21 pm

    Bro, turn the phone sideways!

    I hate that….

  • COB
    May 11, 2015 at 4:54 pm

    Aw… Jaime looks a little like Lisa Bonet circa 1986. I’m tearing up from the nostalgia!

  • Clean Hippie
    May 11, 2015 at 4:52 pm

    With a nickname on Facebook like “the plugg” (slang for drug dealer) it’s no wonder she hadn’t been caught already..

  • TurtleBoySpurts
    May 11, 2015 at 4:39 pm

    Awaiting moderation? TB’s suddenly feeling the need to restrict free speech??? Can’t wait for Gambone to weigh in on this oppression.

  • Nanny
    May 11, 2015 at 4:21 pm

    Oh, and I put a Jackson on that AK being airsoft. Good luck pointing that thing at one of us who carry the real thing legally.

  • Nanny
    May 11, 2015 at 4:16 pm

    Several years ago I played for the Revere Lugnuts of the Boston Men’s Baseball League. Imagine the interesting items we would have to clean up before the field was fit for play! Paraphernalia, baggies, syringes, diapers, beer bottles… and the field was at a Jr. HS.

    It was bad enough playing among the greenhead flies in July up there. The trash and biohazard materials were the icing.

    My eyes have since declined and the game weeded me out. I enjoyed that team, but man what a crappy place to play ball.

  • Magna
    May 11, 2015 at 2:22 pm

    DUUUUUDE stop misusing the word Hippie. Call them Liberals or something. They are not fucking hippies.

    • Wabbitt
      May 11, 2015 at 3:19 pm

      Aging hippy liberal douche.

    • Leo
      May 11, 2015 at 5:21 pm

      They’re not liberals either. You can have a respectful discussion of differences with a liberal.

  • RJ
    May 11, 2015 at 1:51 pm

    First and foremost, the real victim here is society. Every time you hold your camera upright to take a picture or a video, instead of sideways like god intended, the terrorists win.

    Second, there’s no way that Jamie person is a guy. Zero. Percent. Chance. Please blur the nipples if there are any followup features. We’re only saved by some lucky finger placement. The nation’s preeminent feminist family blog needs to have some decency standards.

    Third….heh, Revere. The New Jersey of New England.

    • The.Kurgen
      May 11, 2015 at 2:21 pm

      I was thinking the samething when I saw the first picture, clearly Turtleboy had to be wrong, but nope when I saw his scrawny little chest in the second picture it turns out Turtleboy was right after all. These freaks are unreal, I can’t understand how these people survived evolution.

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