Sports

Scientific Study Proves I’m Right: Buffalo Bills Fans Are Drunkest In NFL

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Remember when I wrote a blog a couple weeks ago about Buffalo Bills fans being the most vile, offensive drunks in the NFL, and a bunch of idiots said that I was wrong? I do. I had every yahoo out there telling me that the Browns or the Steelers or the Raiders or the Jets had way more abrasive fans. Well, it turns out a scientific study proved that I was right. Here’s this tidbit from Bleacherreport:

One author has labeled the Buffalo Bills fanbase as the hardest-drinking crew in the league. NFL stadium aficionado Sean MacDonald has anointed Buffalo Bills supporters as the drunkest fans in the entire NFL.

In his book, Ultimate Football Road Trip, MacDonald writes about spending the 2013 football season on the road. He visited every stadium in the NFL, rating each for its facilities, fans and general ballpark ambiance.

One of his takeaways: Some Bills fans get too drunk and become potentially dangerous.

In his book, MacDonald recounts watching the crowd at Ralph Wilson Stadium melt into an inebriated mess over the course of the Bills’ October 13, 2013, matchup against the Cincinnati Bengals

What I remember most of all here is the wild atmosphere, one of the craziest I saw during my travels, with much of it due to excessive alcohol consumption. Bills fans are the drunkest I witnessed on my trip. That is true before, during and after the game. … Inside the stadium seemed like a free-for-all at times. … I believe that most [NFL fans] are capable of controlling their alcohol intake, but here [at Ralph Wilson Stadium], the majority is simply trying to get as drunk as possible.

The author goes on to say that Bills fans spilled prodigious amounts beer and were quick to turn violent after a long day of dedicated drinking. MacDonald hinges his claim on several deeply stupid and shocking moments when alcohol supposedly left an ugly mark on the franchise. The most well-known incident he references involves a man who fell from the stadium’s 300 level in 2013 while trying to slide down a railing. The man and another fan were sent to the hospital. Both were treated for their injuries.

Proof beyond a reasonable doubt. An actual scientific case study that proves that Bills fans are wild animals who should be caged up permanently in Ralph Wilson stadium.

This article could not possibly be worded any better. It is 100% accurate too. This quote said it all:

“Inside the stadium seemed like a free-for-all at times. … I believe that most [NFL fans] are capable of controlling their alcohol intake, but here [at Ralph Wilson Stadium], the majority is simply trying to get as drunk as possible”

It really is a free for all inside Ralph Wilson. I challenged you all two weeks ago and I’ll challenge you again. I dare you to get tickets to the Pats game in Buffalo on Columbus Day Weekend. And the rule is that if you come you MUST wear Patriots gear or else it doesn’t count. You won’t. Only the strongest survive up there. But the bottom line is that if you’re not a real Patriots fan until you make the six hour trip down I-90 West. The only one’s drunker than Bills fans at a Patriots game, are Patriots fans on a road trip. Without pounding beers in the parking lot all day you simply won’t have the courage to walk into that shitbox of a stadium.

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And he’s right about being able to control their alcohol intake. There’s drunk, and then there’s Buffalo drunk. Of course they’re trying to get as drunk as possible. What would you do if week in and week out you had to watch a team shlop to 5-11 record? What would you do if you had to go back to working at the same mill your Daddy and his Daddy worked at? What would you do if you got facialized by 150 inches of snow every winter? What you do if every day you woke up you saw overcast and polluted Lake Erie? You’d get shithoused obviously. Because everyone knows that drinking makes all of your problems go away.

The only thing I’m disappointed in that this guy failed to point out how Buffalo fans give zero fucks about political correctness. There are a lot of things you could say in 1992 that you can’t say in 2014. Think anyone in Buffalo got that memo? Nope. Think they’d stop if they did get the memo? LOL, calm down fuck boi.

And on that note I’ll leave you with things that Bills fans publicly post on their Facebook page about Tom Brady’s sexuality and other fun Buffalo stuff!!

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Feel free to share your thoughts to keep the conversation going.

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7 Comment(s)
  • Jeebis
    December 9, 2015 at 4:35 pm

    Wow get your facts right stupid dumb people. Bills fans are NOT the worst. Screw retarded people like u u people should go to jail drunkards

  • Matt
    October 1, 2015 at 9:19 pm

    I’m not sure where you attended school, or got accredited to speak on matters of science, but an author writing a book about their personal experiences at different stadiums is NOT a scientific study. You’re a mentally defunct dipshit.

  • October 13, 2014 at 4:41 pm

    Brady is a Lady!

  • Jack
    August 13, 2014 at 10:55 am

    1) your article 2 weeks ago pointed out they were abrasive. Not the drunkest. This article points out there the drunkest, doesn’t say anything about being the most abrasive. So how does this “scientifically” prove you right?

    2) you live in Woercester. Also a mill town that flourished in it’s industrial hayday and the fell flat on it’s face. Buffalo is the laughing stock of NYS byt Worcester is the laughingstock of NE. So, glass houses my friend.

  • August 12, 2014 at 6:27 pm

    You forgot to mention all the drunk college students from St. Bonaventure throwing dick sandwiches around the parking lot during the tailgate.

    • Joey G
      August 12, 2014 at 8:36 pm

      Yeah I got hit with a dick sandwich myself one time. It wasn’t as unpleasant as you’d think, but it still wasn’t exactly an invite to come back.

  • Joey G
    August 12, 2014 at 4:36 pm

    I have to agree with you… although I don’t know how scientific or official any of these rankings are. I would prefer not to have a dick sandwich thrown at me this year in Buffalo… particularly when I am just sitting there in church on Saturday afternoon.

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