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Yesterday we published this blog about the Northbridge Noodlepoon who was lionizing himself as the champion of feeding hungry children, while simultaneously attacking anyone who asked him any questions and playing the “everyone is attacking me card.”
We had a feeling he wouldn’t be able to shut up after reading the blog, since that’s his M.O. We also told him that messaging Clarence Woods Emerson would be useless since Clarence is suspended for 30 days for supporting the Yarmouth Police. Nevertheless he persisted….
But that has not silenced him at all on the Facebook machine…
“I stopped the lunch shaming in town.”
This guy is the greatest hero of all time in his own mind.
And in classic ratchet style he’s basking in his newfound Turtleboy fame and using it as a chance to share his GoFundMe:
Despite literally blowing Clarence not to write a blog…….
…..he now claims that Turtleboy only “used to be” a big deal on Facebook, until a “young woman from black lives matter” crossed us.
Now all of a sudden, despite previously being a “huge fan,” Turtleboy is filled with idiots and liars who attack people (shocking he would once again play this card) for no reason:
Because when you can’t play the race card, play the “attack” card.
Oh, and he’s bragging that he has a larger social media following than us too, for his bootleg realty business:
It got to the point where he was such an embarrassment that the non-profit issued a statement letting the public know that in no way, shape, or form was he affiliated with them:
But still he persisted, due to his fortitude and courage. Because, “if not me, who?”
Clearly there is only one man who can save this town from cheese sandwiches at the middle school.
Not all heroes wear capes.
He really wants to find out my identity…..
It’s true Michael, this is me:
I’m a minimum wage reporter at free Worcester Magazine who can’t stop writing about Turtleboy.
He also was looking for a good lawyer, possibly for deformation lawsuits. Luckily many turtle riders were able to provide him with referrals…
Not Dick N. Vulva!! That guy is a LOAD of baggage in the courtroom!!
As soon as I saw how obnoxious this twatsicle was on that page I knew there had to be more to him. You don’t just act a fool like that once. It’s who you are. And as soon as we blogged about it the floodgates opened. Here’s some things credible sources have alleged about him…..
- He was allegedly fired a year ago as a mortgage lender for being a “toxic dick”
Toxic? Weird. He seems so stable and easy to get along with.
- He committed mortgage fraud several times and was caught by an agent and a client, leading to his company pulling his mortgage license, and firing him
- He tells everyone the chose was his to leave, but it really wasn’t
- He and his girlfriend opened a real estate company and is allegedly not paying his fees
Mortgage fraud? You’re telling me this guy is a fraud and a huckster? I don’t believe it!! He’s the town hero who saved kids from cheese sandwiches!!
So we checked to see if he was a real estate agent. First we went to his company’s website…
I mean, he doesn’t say he’s a realtor on there. Just that he owns a real estate company and used to be a marine.
So we Googled his partner’s name, and his name. She checks out as a realtor:
He does not:
So who knows. In fairness, he’s never actually told us he’s a realtor so we won’t cast judgement that the guy who owns a realty business doesn’t appear to be a realtor.
Here’s what a source else told us about the alleged mortgage scam he got busted for….
- He refinanced a VA loan for a veteran so they could buy another home using the VA again.
- The problem arose when the “new loan” on the old home was also a government backed loan, which means the client needs to owner occupy.
- Since the client couldn’t live in two homes he refused to sign the paperwork.
- Mikey told him to “be about it,” (a common line of his) and berated him, telling him that they do it all the time and no one will know.
LOL. “Be about it.” So many people have messaged us and told us that he is OBSESSED with this phrase. Don’t wanna follow the rules or the laws? Bro, just be about it. Whatever that means. Problem solved.
According to more than one source he fucked over a veteran with the VA loan too….
- His payout would’ve been much higher on the refi and presumably higher with an FHA (government secured) than on a conventional (held by financial institution).
- He allegedly had not started the file on the loan for the new property that the client was under agreement on.
- He was planning on refinancing him and then sticking him with the house and saying either you can’t buy it, or refinance him again for another fee so he could.
That’s not good. Is it true? We’d love to hear from the Northbridge Noodlepoon about his side of the story is.
Oh, and then there was this….
Once again, the key word here is “alleged.” At Turtleboy Sports we like to let all parties have their say. So he only “allegedly” groped a woman in the office. The rape claim is also unfounded at the moment, as no evidence exists to back that up. We also have not heard his side of the story. Perhaps he was really just trying to feed the homeless at work when she attacked him with her ass. He’ll have to fill us in on the details.
On that note, Uncle Turtleboy did speak with this alleged victim today after my blog, and recorded it all on the Podcast which will be dropping tonight. So stay tuned for that.
However, the alleged victim #1 (there are several others who sources tell us are victims who are more than willing to speak with us anonymously) did issue a challenge to the Northbridge Noodlepoon – she will confront him LIVE on Turtleboy Live this Sunday night with Bret Killoran and Merrimack Valley Turtlebae. She will come on only if he agrees to come on with her. Will he take her up on the challenge? We will have to wait and see. If Mikey wants to join them he’s gonna have to message the Turtleboy Sports Returns Facebook page and figure out the deets. I’m guessing he doesn’t show, since he’s already blocked Clarence.
Marine? Can we find a DD214 on the dude? Where’s Stolen Valor?
Butt-nut has the twinkle of bath-salts in his eye or is that Botox?
Would you go alone with him to view a property? He looks complete psycho.
Any parent that won’t or can’t pay 2.75 a day for their chide to eat should have the kids taken away. What they spending the welfare on?? Where the food stab, snap money going to? Tell me that
Those are all lies perpetrated by the Cabot Cheese consortium. And, you are buying their propaganda hook, line and sinker. You are a bunch of fools. You’ll never find any dirt on that American hero! All lies, alibis and french fries. You want the truth? Collusion, man! Bread honchos and cheese magnates. Tale as old as time. They financed the Earl of Sandwich’s bread/cheese/bread patents. Follow the money. Who stands to make out in the deal? Smell the baker man at the school committee meeting. Trust your nose. BE your nose. Be about it, bro! Really. I’m not saying Jared has anything to do with it… but think about it. Jared, sandwiches, kids, Subway… CHEESE… Don’t you get it?!?! CHEESE!!!
100%, 100%. 4 Reelz.
At least he was right about how long it takes to be able to try an read this blog. And now some comments get deleted too.. hmmm?
TB is deleting comments now? WTF
I’m wondering if Private Pyle here was a Section 8.
He’s as kooky as Corporal Klinger, who actually wasn’t crazy, but just pretended to be.
What kind of idiot who is trying to establish his own business pulls this kind of shit on social media? Does this fucking imbecile think that this exposure is going to help his business? He’ll be on to his next business venture very soon. On another note, Northbridge schools are not good enough for his kids? His ex could have been a nuclear physicist and his kids would Roxbury Community College material at best. Maybe his next venture will be in public relations?
Klinger was fond of wearing women’s clothing and undies, judging by that screaming day-glowf Fuscia shirt he also enjoys women’s fashion on himself.
His eyes say it all….
HI I’M CRAZY AS FUCK!!!! I INSULATED MY CELLAR SO NOBODY COULD HEAR THE SCREAMING.
Observing the kooky eyes and the smile that is trying way too hard in these photos…depression, anger, and sociopath tendencies on display front and center..not surprised in the slightest either that there’s a history of activity involving the violation of people’s trust with mortgage fraud. Sociopaths can be very charming and convincing when they want to be.
He’s a sick fuck alright. Like you said trying too hard…( I care about kids dammit!!). Nobody will stop me from controlling the children’s lunch money account.
How many remains of missing women from the streets of Worcester and Providence could he lead authorities to.
‘You piggies are gonna pay for lunch!’
What they need’s a damn good whacking!
Carve a swastika on this dude’s forehead and he’s pass for a Manson family member
Please correct me if I’m wrong, but do ‘feel good’ liberals always seem to have the same ‘wide wild-eyed’ look that Charles Manson had in their eyes?
Anyone else notice it?
Agreed. The good news is when we start doing PSAs discouraging men from consuming soy, we have our mascot. Super Soy Boy to the PTA Lunch Committee Rescue.