Follow @TurtleboyNews on Twitter by clicking here.
Follow Turtleboy on Instagram by clicking here.
Follow and like the Turtleboy Sports Forever, the newest Turtleboy Sports page and Clarence Woods Emerson to keep up with the hilarious turtle rider commentary.
Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information.
If you like free speech and want to support what we’re doing, feel free to donate to the Turtle fund:
The State Senate’s Ethics Committee released it’s report on what former Senate President Stan Rosenberg’s ex-husband Bryon Hefner has been up to, and it is WILD!! Let’s check out some of the highlights…..
Rosenberg was aware of Hefner’s inappropriate behavior. The report states that Hefner sent multiple sexually explicit texts to Rosenberg, including one text in 2016 where he stated, “I want to roofie (a Senator) and make a sex tape,” referring to a date rape drug. Rosenberg told investigators that Hefner sent him pictures of naked men that he downloaded from the internet as a joke, and Rosenberg told him to stop.
HAHHAHAHHA!! This is amazing. He sends Stan the Man a text message saying he wants to roofie another State Senator AND make a sex tape with them. The only question is, who is this State Senator? I think I know who the odds on favorite is…..
It’s gotta be Jamie Eldridge right? He’s the perfect candidate. He’s in his mid 40’s or early 50’s, unmarried, big proponent of gay rights, and never seems to be pictured with women. Can you really blame Hefner if he tried to recruit him?
Look, Stan Rosenberg is a disgusting old man from Amherst. No one in the gay community is actually sexually attracted to him. He’s like, 35 years older than Hefner, who is basically his trophy bitch.
Because gold diggers are a thing in the gay community too. And just like with hot chicks, spicy young gay guys like this tend to come with some baggage. It’s the price you pay, and you know you’re signing up for it when you go for a younger model. You want a drama free lifestyle? Go for someone your own age. But Stan wanted the young buck, so now he’s gotta live with the consequences.
Rosenberg knew that the guy he was married to was a P-town pork peddler, but he thought he could change him. He thought he could reign him in. Which is why he put up a “firewall”:
In 2014, after Hefner posted disparaging comments on social media about outgoing Senate President Therese Murray, Rosenberg said he maintained a “firewall” between Hefner and his work in the Senate. The report found that the firewall was ineffective.
Ummmm…..what does that even mean? A firewall? You can’t cage a serial bum bandit. They are meant to be free at the end of the day. Stan Rosenberg is like every woman who’s ever thought to herself, “I can change him”…..
Hefner on one occasion berated a Senate staffer with inappropriate racist comments. The staffer told Rosenberg, who said he would do everything he could to prevent Hefner from engaging in similar conduct in the future.
…..only to find out that that’s a tiger in heat can’t change its stripes:
In 2013, Hefner repeatedly touched a Senate staffer’s foot in a social setting, then sent text messages asking for a “sleepover” at the Beacon Hill condo that Hefner and Rosenberg shared. Hefner texted the staffer a photograph of what he said was his penis.
Like I said, you can’t keep a cockpipe cosmonaut from going into outer space. You have to let them blast off. Either Stan Rosenberg was completely naive when he married this guy, or he knew he was gonna bang half of Stonewall and Stan wanted in on the action. I’m going with the latter. How else would Hefner feel comfortable inviting Rosenberg’s appropriately named “staffers” over to their Beacon Hill condo for some pillow party time? Stan the Man lives there. He would’ve found out. There’s no way this hadn’t worked in the past. There’s a 99.9% chance it was orgy central on Beacon Hill. This is just one of the rare times he struck out.
A Senate staff member in 2015 and 2016 said Hefner sent him numerous sexually suggestive text messages. One read, “You weren’t my gift under the Menorah this year. I’m mad at Santa,” and was followed by a text of Hefner sitting shirtless on Santa’s lap.
Talk about bold!! He clearly doesn’t know if these guys are even gay who he’s sending topless pics with Santa to. He’s just kind of throwing it out there to see if he gets any biters (no pun intended). I think based on his overall aggressiveness we can all tell who the bottom is. Spoiler alert – not this guy:
So just to review. This “policy advocate” (which sounds like a lobbyist) is moderating a political dinner discussion. So I’m trying to imagine this environment. It it’s a formal enough discussion that it requires a moderator, I’m picturing people in suits being waited on. And while this poor policy advocate is trying to let everyone have an equal amount of speaking time, the Hef-dog is grabbing his womb broom underneath the table. That’s gotta be awkward.
And then he kicks it up a notch:
He later asked the advocate to have sex with him in a bathroom. Hefner told the man he had access to Rosenberg.
I mean, you gotta be pretty brazen to ask the policy expert, who might not even swing that way, to go for a quickie on the shitter. Of course he had to throw in that he had “access” to Rosenberg, a very powerful man, which would obviously benefit a guy who was advocating for a certain political policy. He knew exactly the power that his husband had and he used it to try to introduce Puff the one-eyed dragon to some new kingdoms.
This guy redefines what it means to give zero fucks.
But all of this can still be blamed exclusively on Hefner. This can’t:
The report found that Rosenberg gave Hefner access to his Senate email account from 2009 to 2017. Although there is no evidence Hefner influenced Rosenberg’s official actions, the report found that Hefner repeatedly abused his access to Rosenberg’s computer.
He abused his access to a computer? I think we’ve all done that before. Just sayin.
But why the hell would you ever give your knobgobblin husband access to your work email? That’s just dumb. You know who you’re married to. You know nothing good will come of this. Yet Stan did it anyway, because he wanted to keep his trophy husband happy.
Hefner contacted Rosenberg’s staff in 2013 to try to gain funding for a program for at-risk youth that Hefner worked for. Another time, Hefner forwarded an email sent to Rosenberg by a policy advocate to his colleagues at the program, marking it “confidential.”
Oh good, Hefner works with “at risk youth.” What could possibly go wrong with a sexual deviant working with troubled and vulnerable children? Sounds like a great idea.
He did this just last year:
On two occasions in January 2017, Hefner wrote emails pretending to be Rosenberg, trying to set up meetings related to official Senate business. Hefner also criticized and demeaned Rosenberg’s staff. In one case, Hefner texted two staffers from Rosenberg’s phone as if he were Rosenberg, writing, “you’re all still failures for your lack of foresight. … Sometimes the best person for the job is a straight white man.”
This dude’s fucking NUTS man. This is worse then Dianne Kelly pretending to be a cat on Facebook. He hacked his husband’s email and pretended to be the president of the State Senate. Wild. This doesn’t even make any sense either. The best person for the job is a straight white man? Wait….what?
Stan’s got plenty of excuses though:
Rosenberg told investigators that he could not completely wall his spouse off from his work, and he wanted Hefner to have access to his calendar, but he never allowed Hefner to influence his decisions.
You couldn’t wall him off from your work? Here’s an idea – don’t give him access to your email. That might be a good start.
Charlie Baker and Maura Healey have both demanded that Rosenberg resign. When you’re a democrat and Maura Healey turns on you, you know you done fucked up. This is a woman who backed up Moses Dixon while he was running for State Rep, even after we revealed that Dixon had previously been arrested for beating the shit out of his girlfriend. Not a good sign for Stan the Man.
But will he resign? I’m thinking he kind of has to at this point. But then again, Roy Moore refused to step down after a billion girls claim he violated them because he felt like there was no way Alabama wouldn’t elect a Republican. He was wrong, but Rosenberg’s seat in Amherst is way safer than Moore’s was in Birmingham.
I’m kind of hoping he doesn’t resign, just to see what happens when he runs again. He represents the People’s Republic of Amherst. You would think it’s virtually impossible for a Republican ever to come out of his district. And quite frankly I’d love nothing more than to see him go up against some Trump diehard. It will be the ultimate popsicle headache for Amherst liberals, and it will reveal once and for all how full of shit they are. Make no doubt about it – Rosenberg would win. Because at the end of the day his pussy hat wearing, Me Too shouting band of supporters don’t actually care about sexual harassment. They care about party politics, which is why someone like Stan Rosenberg becomes Senate President in the first place.
31 Comment(s)
Rosenberg retired as planned and left all of his staffers and friends with huge sexual harassment settlements courtesy of you the taxpayer. Rosenberg is dumb like a fox and Massachusetts politicians are corrupt enough to go along with it.
Dude’s dick probably looks like E.T.’s finger.
Jews. That’s it. That’s all I needed to know. Once I read “Rosenberg” I knew. Jew sexual deviant.
Jews were a huge force in the black civil rights era of the 50’s and 60’s, but recently that activism has turned into pushing a free for all, no holes barred type of sexuality that is absolutely disgusting.
I’m cool with people who are gay. They should definitely be treated equally with regards to marriage, paid leave, probate matters, etc.
But this whole “you can be a titless thing with two pussies, no asshole and three testicles”, call yourself a transpanflimflamsexual and want to force us to pay for it and respect it is absurd.
It’s the same type of sick and perverted Jew behavior that created the conditions in Germany for WW2. They were sick of Jew bankers and Jew sexual sickos perverting their children and society. Same thing has been happening here since the 40’s. Jews promote mindless music, movies and media that avoids talking at all about white European culture or anything related to whiteness. It’s all about blacks, Jews and Latinos. It puts down whites and white European and American culture in favor of Jewish perversion. The more sexually deviant and willing to suck off black dongs the better for the Jews.
And speaking of black dongs, don’t forget that Jews promote interracial porn, tv, movies and just interracial relationships in general. I don’t care who you love, and I’m not saying don’t date or fuck outside of your race. But don’t do it because you’re pressured into doing it because not doing it would be “rayciss”, or because it’s in a movie or on the goddamn coal burning Kardashians.
Heck, most white people these days don’t know if they’re Irish, French, Scandinavian, German or what. But they’ll identify with all those phony bologna Middle Eastern places in the bible like they’re some fairy tale land. Ridiculous.
In the words of the late, great Daniel Carver, “wake up white people!”
Carver is still ALIVE…
Uh oh. Time to take the House of Many Cums to Newton or Cambridge where it’s safe. There’s too many goys and shiksas around here, and nobody even jacks off in public.
Can’t argue with anything you said. You’re totally right.
So who was top and who was bottom?
Just wondering
Phrenology is real. Look at the space between Hefner’s eyes. This not only makes him look like a goat, but is also indicative of having a criminalistic mind.
None of this surprises me. I mean, we are talking about MA legislature here. Beacon Hill is filled with losers, hacks, sodomites, socialists and crooks. Give me one name that isn’t! Just one!
I will give you two-
Geoff Diehl
Shaunna O’Connell
Vote Diehl for Senate!
Whats this world coming to?
Muff diver Healey turning on a sodomite aids infected dick sucker. Wait til 60 minutes head dick sucker gets a hold of this story.
He resigned. Why? Because the Senate was going to throw him out on his ear. Rest assured, if left to his own devices, he would have run for re-election and won. Why? Because the socialist kooks in Amherst /Hamp/Leverett, et al would have reelected him. Guaranteed.
Simply put, liberalism is a mental disorder and the People’s Republic of Amherst and Northampton is their Shangri-La !
Hell, if that useless shill Maura Healey won’t even back you…. you’re toast. As for Charlie Faker ? He just wets his finger and sticks it in the wind. A ball-less wonder.
Is he related to PEE WEE Hermen??
Two words. Term limits. Unfortunately never going to happen in this socialist state.
The smartest thing to ever come out of Rosenberg’s mouth was Hefner’s junk.
( not saying much)
Come again?
You can tell by looking at his jowls in the pic……..Stan ain’t happy unless them puffy cheeks are full of Creme Pie.
What sort of behavior do you expect from people who are already on the wrong end of the normal meter? Make me laugh whenever people act shocked after hearing something like this – you were expecting Leave It To Beaver?
These two look like Gopher from Winnie the Pooh and Tweety from Looney Toons. Maybe Tweety can go after Barnie “Smokes the” Frank?
I’m no stud but two gay fish don’t make a new fish. But I don’t eat fish so if someone kills a whale I could care less. But the right beaver.
Way to go Mass Dems just keep electing these creeps!!!!!!!!
Back in July of 2017 I wrote to Stan about the budget shortfall, quoting him from a newspaper article:
Senate President Stanley Rosenberg took a more dim view of the budget, calling it “the harshest state budget since the last recession.”
“It would have been somewhat better had it contained the Senate’s modest revenue proposals including those on Airbnb, internet hotel resellers, flavored cigars, film tax, and the Community Preservation Act,” he said. “We can take some measure of pride in what we were able to do for local aid, children, and veterans, but too many were left behind.”
I replied:
You fucking moronic, mediocre piece of shit. A 40 billion dollar budget isn’t enough for you greedy hacks? You need more money than that to run this fucking state? I remember not too long ago that the state budget was $20B. It’s more than doubled in ten years. You think you’re going to make up the revenue shortfall by taxing flavored cigars and AirBnB rentals? You are an old fool. How about spending less, genius? Nobody who is poor in this state is hurting; they are all very well taken care of due to your liberal policies. At this rate Mass will be the next Illinois, and you’ll be the next Michael Madigan. All you need to do now is to implement the millionaire tax and all of the wealthiest taxpayers flee this socialist hell hole, then you’ll really have revenue problems.
Someone (supposedly Stan himself) replied:
“How do you really feel ? I can’t tell from your email?”
I wonder if it was Brian Pee Wee Herman Heffner? Nah, must have been Stan or another staffer; there were no dick pics in the reply.
“They care about party politics, which is why someone like Stan Rosenberg becomes Senate President in the first place. ” the same people who vote for Ted Kennedy after he killed a women
Leave me out of this I have been sober for 9 years now
Jews are sick sick sick people walking around wearing penis hats,sick.
I didn’t know the Mass senate president was married to David Hogg
I’m not too sure that this little lad has n’t spent plenty of time being the bottom TB…..in fact I can guarantee you his rectum is a two way street
Barney Frank has to be involved in this somehow.
When Rosie’s the “wife” of Pee Wee then he’s a bitch.
Rosenberg also has the advantage of constant turnover of students at UMASS if they vote in the elections. Every year 25% of those are gone and a new 25% show up. Also factor in that he doesn’t run every year.
I was behind Stan the Man one time at the Burger King (since gone) drive-through in Hadley about 15 years ago; they were taking forever to get his order ready and he started screaming at them in his poofy voice. That’s all I ever needed to see to know what type of little turd bandit he was.