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NBC News: “I have to apologize.” 

Those are the words Miss Universe host Steve Harvey was forced to utter — and may regret for years to come — after mistakenly crowning Miss Colombia, Paulina Vega, as the winner of the 2015 beauty pageant. 

She wasn’t. 

After Vega was crowned and was performing the ritual wave to the audience inside the Planet Hollywood Las Vegas Resort & Casino, Harvey came back on stage to deliver the awkward and devastating news. 

“The first runner-up is Colombia,” Harvey said. 

That’s when the real winner, Pia Alonzo Wurstbach of the Philippines, began to look around stunned and wondering what had just happened. 

“Miss Universe 2015 is Philippines,” Harvey said, ending the suspense.

“Listen, folks. Let me just take control of this,” Harvey went on to tell the bewildered audience. “This is exactly what’s on the card. I will take responsibility for this. It was my mistake.”

I love Steve Harvey. That guy has single handedly brought the Family Feud back to life. Here I was watching Al Borlin, Louie Anderson, and Mr. Peterman being all gropey with aunt Nadine, and this whole time we had this hilarious guy with baggy suits sitting at home living off of royalties from the Kings of Comedy.

The Internet is destroying him right now, and he’s issued a public apology. And for what? So he screwed up the Miss Universe winner announcement. Who cares? There’s nothing more meaningless than the winner of a beauty pageant. It could be Miss Colombia or Miss Philippines or Miss Angola. Doesn’t matter. They just pick out of a hat anyway. Beauty pageants are just an excuse for us to watch hot women parade around in bikinis and then pretend like we value what they have to say by making one of them the winner.

And why does he have to announce the runners up in order like that? Just tell us who the winner is and get it over with. It’s the format’s fault, not Steve Harvey’s. But geniuses like this aren’t happy about it:

Big offense* to the country of Colombia? Your country is known for cocaine, kidnapping, and druglords. The least of your worries is Steve Harvey accidentally crowning the most visually appealing woman in your country Miss Universe for all of 30 seconds. That 30 seconds was by far the best thing that ever happened to your country. I know I enjoyed every awkward second of it.

Everything I know about Colombian women comes from watching Modern Family. And if Sophia Vergara has taught me anything, hot Colombian women never forget a perceived slight. There’s a 90% chance this woman murders Steve Harvey by the end of the week. #PrayForSteveHarvey

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