Hoodrat Heroes

Taunton Junior Hoodrat Starts $800 GoFundMe To Raise Money For Dope, Because “I’m Just A Fein To Be Honest”

Taunton Junior Hoodrat Starts $800 GoFundMe To Raise Money For Dope, Because “I’m Just A Fein To Be Honest”

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We’ve seen a lot of shady GoFundMe’s before. Usually they beat around the bush about some sob story, ask you for money to pay rent so they don’t get evicted, and they end up blowing it on smack. But until we found this Taunton junior hoodrat, we’ve never seen someone just come outright and say it – I am raising money for drugs:

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Just a fein “too” be honest. What he should be doing is starting a GoFundMe for Hooked on Phonics.

Apparently this kid is actually still in high school, so I’m sure his parents (who I’m sure are actively involved in his life and doing a GREAT job) are wicked proud. Michael Keegan sure does like to use the n word:

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He’s wicked hardcore


He rocks the man bun:


He’s a G Turtle who keeps it 100


And he enjoys the occasional bromance with a fellow like minded Taunton sewer guppy

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How long till this GoFundMe shuts down? Don’t worry kid, this blog is the best thing that’s ever gonna happen to you. You’re obviously not very smart, and you’re not getting any sort of guidance from your family. So Turtleboy is here to teach you a very valuable life lesson – drugs are bad, GoFundMe scams are for ratchets, and the Internet is forever.




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11 Comment(s)
  • Wabbitt
    February 23, 2017 at 1:32 pm

    I do have to applaud his honesty.

    Not giving him money, but at least he’s honest.

  • Sloppy
    February 22, 2017 at 10:03 pm

    There is a common theme to shitty white trash has-been milltowns in Massachusetts. They’re filled with the moron descendents of morons who didn’t leave when the factories closed.
    The towns in Appalachia with closed-down coal mines are the same.
    Makes me want to grab a time machine, go back to 1972 like the ghost of Christmas future and tell their grandfathers: “Look, asshole. The factory/mine/whatever was the only source of income in this shithole isn’t coming back. You’d better figure out something else to do for a living here, or pack up your shit and move somewhere else and get another job. You see this photograph of this skinny dipshit with fake gold chains, plucked eyebrows, his skinny ripped jeans falling off his ass and a flat-brimmed ballcap with a picture of a cow on the front? That’s what will become of your loser grandson if you don’t leave this town NOW. And his father, your son, also a loser, rides a bicycle around town with a 30-rack of Beast Ice. Just go! Leave town now! Go like the wind, I say! For your grandchildren!”

    • Wabbitt
      February 23, 2017 at 1:33 pm

      Sounds like a Rick and Morty episode.

  • Ray
    February 22, 2017 at 7:59 pm

    Then the mike kid also just beat up a female so he’s so tuff fucking pussy

  • KimberlyS
    February 22, 2017 at 4:52 pm

    Does Mom never look at her kid before he leaves the house and say, “What the Hell are you wearing?”

  • Duke Westwood
    February 22, 2017 at 3:43 pm

    The thing is… How do we know he set up the GoFundMe? I was a smart ass kid back in the day… That is the exact thing I would do if I wanted to fuck with somebody…

  • Contributing member of society
    February 22, 2017 at 3:41 pm

    Here is a Thot for ya kid stay in school get good grades and become someone who contributes to society. LMAO. I don’t see that happening with this winner. I see flat brimmed Chicago Bulls hats in his near future.

  • Michael Keegan
    February 22, 2017 at 3:26 pm

    I was jus’ jokin’. Gawsh…

  • Turd Burglestein
    February 22, 2017 at 2:35 pm

    Isn’t that cute…they have matching pants, matching belts, and matching pube farms.

    • True Reality Speaks
      Tired of Don't Snitch Pussies
      February 23, 2017 at 7:18 am

      Never understood why and when guys started wearing chick pants and worried about being more fashion conscious than women.

  • Rich
    February 22, 2017 at 2:14 pm

    the GoFundMe page is already gone. That was quick. Nice work, TB.

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