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Last week we put out our poll for Worcester’s most hilariously idiotic hippies. We wanted to compile an official top 20, but there were so many to choose from so we let you pick up to 10. Here are the results…..
20. Marianna Islam – 172
This seems about right. She lives to be an annoying troglodyte. She makes her money off of imaginary racism, but ultimately she’s not entertaining enough to make it higher on the list.
19. Keesha LaTulippe – 210
She kind of gets lost in the hippie mix because she doesn’t make appearances at protests. But she’s always there with her pant suit and sassy quotes every time there’s a chance to call cops or teachers racist.
18. Nicholas “The Sunshine Kid” Choquette – 261
I feel like he should be a lot higher. This kid is such a fantastic hippie and he has so much potential going forward. I mean, just look at him. He’s spectacular. A lilly white kid from Princeton, who may or may not be sleeping on Gordon Davis’ couch. You can’t make a more hilarious hippie than this if you tried.
17. Deb Powers – 281
The irony of this woman who had child pornography downloaded in her apartment while claiming that Turtleboy was the biggest problem plaguing the city, is fantastic theater. But seriously, this woman pays her rent with a GoFundMe, hasn’t worked in years, and whines about how unfair America is from her iPhone. She is a magnificent creature.
16. Chris Robarge – 340
Too high. Personally I’d put Dana Remian, Joe Corazzini, or Michael Jerry above him. He’s kind of a quiet hippie, since he’s the leader of the ACLU. We only hear from him when a child molester wants to move next door to you, or a panhandler wants to jump out in front of your car.
15. Julius Jones – 357
Someone get this man a shower. For a guy who preaches “love” a lot, he sure is an angry hippie. At the last city council meeting when he was kicked out for threatening Councilor Gaffney, I felt like I could smell his hippie stench through the TV.
14. Crazy Ol’ Gordon Davis – 465
He should definitely be higher. Top five I’d say. The man is so insane yet you cannot look away. He’s like the crazy old pigeon lady except with more signs about white supremacy. Every time he makes an appearance it is must-see hippie watching.
13. Cara Berg-Powers – 476
She’s not as funny as some of the other hippies so I didn’t have her ranked as high. When they take themselves too seriously, I don’t get as amused by them. But regardless, she is exactly what I imagined the spawn of Deb Powers would be like.
12. Jordan Berg-Powers – 535
I can’t get enough of that shirt. It’s just so perfect. Goes so well with the hyphenated last name. Yea, it’s kind of sad that this buttnut uses his poor two year old daughter as a weapon in his crusade to stop free speech, but he makes up for it with that shirt.
11. Kevin Ksen – 603
LOL, everyone’s favorite repeat offender didn’t make the top 10? Kind of surprised about that one. Never in my life have a seen a white guy try so hard to prove that the’s one of the “good ones.” Can’t wait to see how many stray bums he picks up in his rape van on election day so he can try to get his girl Sarai re-elected.
10. Lisa Dyer – 653
I wouldn’t put her so high. Probably not even top 20. I mean, we really only heard from her that one time she called one of her best teacher’s a racist. But she doesn’t amuse me nearly as much as some of the other hippies. She’s more of a frightening hippie.
9. ChaCha Connor – 687
I feel like she would’ve been higher if we knew who she was before two weeks ago. Because they just don’t make hippies like this anymore. I mean, this magnificent hippie specimen goes out of her way to fit every stereotype of hippies that has ever existed. From the cha-cha-cha-chia pits, to her Turtle hating swag. I have a feeling we’re gonna be seeing a lot more of her in the future.
8. Nathan Pickens – 704
At first I thought this guy was just your standard racist hippie. But the more this guy talks, the more I realize how desperately he needs some Hooked on Phonics in his life. Is it any surprise he thinks that black people can’t be racist, and that it’s OK to call a community leader a “house nigger” and a “coon?” The man is in racist denial, which he more than likely thinks is a river in South America.
7. Brenda Jenkins – 756
See I think she’s too high because we never hear from her. Honestly though, she scares the shit out of me, and not just because of Urkel specs. She is the GODFATHER of Worcester hippies. That whole Mosaic shitshow at the City Council meeting – she didn’t have to say a word. She just sat in the back and watched as her illiterate foot soldiers (Michael Jerry, Nate Pickens) did her bidding for her. It’s genius really. She makes all this money and all she has to do is find the dumbest mother fuckers on the block, fill them with propaganda and send them off to the front lines to protect her cash cow.
6. Wanda Alvarado-Eaton – 821
Oh Wanda, where have you been my whole life? From your fantastic use of caps lock, to your inflated sense of self worth because you took a picture with a couple politicians who have long since forgotten your name, you never disappoint us every time you hit the “send” button. In all seriousness though, I hope you did some thing about those Asian chicks in the basement. They probably need some fresh air.
5. Joyce McNickles – 917
She’s like Brenda 2.0. Unlike a lot of these other morons, she has something to gain from all this – diversity training. Notice we hardly ever hear from her at these events either. Because just like Brenda she sends her soldiers out there to defend her empire. But she’s just not that funny. The only hilarious part about Joyce is that she made a series of life decisions that ended up with her saying “I do” to a senile guy named Old Balls.
4. Robert Blackwell-Gibbs – 978
I really thought he would win the whole thing. How did he only get fourth? The guy is the ultimate Worcester hippie, and it’s not even really close. His poetry alone will make your heart melt.
3. Old Balls – 986
I fucking love this man. Without his hilarious ramblings, made up stories about racism, and tall tales of what it was like growing up in Worcester during the Great Depression, we would struggle to find material. God bless you Old Balls.
2. Sonya Boom-Boom Connor – 1,050
She really is a terrible, terrible human being. But man, the junk in the drunk is simply undeniable. And that sass….wow, someone get me a towel. From her “it wasn’t me in the Kelley Square video” defense, to her “the Worcester Police are racist and I know this because I’ve lived here for 18 months” ramblings, every time she speaks it’s bloggable.
1. Clive “Spanky” McFarlane – 1,157
Easily the most hated person who has ever lived in Worcester. Seriously, what is there to like about this man? Unlike the other hippies he does nothing to amuse us. His writing is not only unoriginal, racist, and predictable, it’s also very boring. At least when Old Balls writes he’s not trying to be the smartest guy in the room. And I feel like Old Balls views Turtleboy as some sort of adversary. Spanky really thinks Turtleboy is the devil. And that’s not very funny at all.
Also receiving votes: Dana Remian 144, Michael Jerry 136, Jonathan Hardy-Lavoie 119, Joe Corazzini 92, Liz Sheehan Castro 79, Chris Marble 77, Heather Lynn-Haley 65.
So what do you think? Did the voters get it right? Personally my votes were in order, RBG, Old Balls, Boom-Boom, Wanda, Gordon Davis, Deb Powers, the Sunshine Kid, Spanky, Joyce, and ChaCha.
16 Comment(s)
Hahaha! Cha Cha Connors! She was a fruit loop even back in her Hitler Youth days. This former poster child for infanticide is gonna hit puberty one of these days, take a shower & realize she’s an insignificant pimple on the ass of Worcester (and hopefully fade away).
How was Jeffy-boy “Call me Spurts” Neal not even in the poll? Clearly the fix was in.
Thank you TB! You kicked their stupid, racist, hippie asses again!
I can just see Old Balls’ next blog: “This one time I was voted the #3 hippie in Worcester by a racist website. I would have made #1 but not enough of the readers realized I was married to a black woman (I guess I don’t advertise that fact quite enough). Oh well, what are you gonna do?”
I would have figured Dana making it. Sporks and failed boycotts deserve points and placement.
Why is TBS the first place many us click? Pubi used to go to T&G first, maybe one of websites east, then womag and TBS as afterthought. Now so many go to TBS first and last for their late afternoon browsing. TBS is a revolution ! a movement. Oh yeah, found TBS on my own after the wonderful UMASS BC Football piece and like to think I turned on at least 100 folks to TBS since.
If turtleboy could post obits without all the spam that crashes my computer and has MacAfee give me popups warning of dangerous content he would probably pass the Telegram in clicks.
LOL @ Old Balls! He couldn’t win WoMags most popular blogger (even after cowardly betting some one else’s money and bragging about how irreleva… I mean how important he is) and he can’t even win this! LOL
One thing you got wrong though, he is most certainly full of himself. Alzheimer’s meds don’t fix jealous old men’s egos unfortunately.
I am very new to the revolution and I have tried to read all the old posts but I can not for the life of me find Old Balls real name. Help?
Carlo Baldino
If you google Carlo Bladino’s name, all TB memes pop up first, followed by more TB articles …its too funny!
Here:
http://www.telegram.com/article/20150731/BLOGS/307319874/101407
Go have a laugh.
Bullshit!!! I demand a recount!!! How did my boy only land in the #3 spot??
My angel is not only loaded with tons of white guilt, he also converted me from Catholic to atheist ….ON MY DEATHBED. Just ask him….he’ll brag about it for hours.
Dana Remian, as head boycott e-mail writer, should have made the top 10. People just don’t know enough about him.
I’m fuckng pissed I didn’t win it all
I bet Old Balls will demand a recount. He wants to be #1.