WTF

The Amish Teen Arrested For DUI, Driving With Friends On Hood Of Horse And Buggy Will Be An Amish Legend For Years To Come

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SourceAn 18-year-old Pennsylvania Amish man is charged with drunk driving after state police stopped the buggy he was driving while two of his four passengers rode on the roof, according to multiple reports. Robert Miller, of Punxsutawney, and his four friends were also cited for underage drinking. The friends ranged in age from 16 to 20 years old,according to The Associated Press. The legal drinking age in Pennsylvania is 21. Police said all five people arrested had alcohol with them when police stopped their buggy last month for a safety issue. According to WJAC, Miller was stopped July 8 in Indiana County for a safety issue after someone spotted him driving with people on the roof.

Better call Tony Salerno!! This poor kid’s Horse and Buggy insurance rates are about to go through the roof that he built with his bare hands. Was gonna go check out this kid’s Facebook page and couldn’t find anything. Then I was like, oh yea, he’s Amish. They don’t have Facebook pages. Just handcrafted wooden dining room tables that will last you a lifetime.

I honestly didn’t even know the Amish could get arrested for this. I thought they were immune to everything except for murder and the really big stuff. You kind of have to give them a pass. They don’t understand what laws are. They don’t drive cars so they probably have no concept of drinking and driving. The worst thing they can do while they’re drunk is milk a cow.

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Honestly though, this is the best thing that ever happened to Robert, Herschberg, and Ezekial. They just upped their Amish street cred ten fold. You have to figure that the freaky Amish girls are just dying to find a bad boy. Now they’ve got five of them getting wasted on homemade hooch and driving around drunk on top of a horse buggy. These people will be Amish legends for years to come. Unfortunately for them the women probably don’t get to choose their husbands so their only hope of getting lucky is exile to Philadelphia.

 

 

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35 Comment(s)
  • Adam
    August 20, 2016 at 1:56 pm

    Hey TB you have to do something bout fiesty and bobmic……not sure what you can do but I know I leave the site and go elsewhere the moment is see either of those names in the comment section…. The act is so fucking old and pathetic……

  • curious
    August 19, 2016 at 3:07 pm

    Where is Lebanon Levi and the Amish Mafia? They’d take care of this. Merlin’s last was Miller. Hmmm, any relation to Merlin and Scary Mar

  • Reddog
    August 19, 2016 at 2:25 pm

    I have a single woman friend who at this time has 15 horses. Don’t know how she does it,and she works full time too. Lots of hours in the barn,that’s for sure.

  • Finnish Goalie
    August 19, 2016 at 12:02 pm

    • Sal Monella
      August 19, 2016 at 12:53 pm

      Forgot that episode! Hilarious!

  • Sal Monella
    August 19, 2016 at 11:52 am

    I was in Lebanon, PA a few weeks ago. Buggies aplenty. Had to drive careful. Amish are nice folks when you encounter them but they have many social problems like the “English”. Many travel the roads on skateboards, particularly heavy duty older ladies! Strange sight!

  • Kevin Lynch
    August 19, 2016 at 11:33 am

    This is porn

    • Andrew McDonough
      August 19, 2016 at 11:37 am

      Snuff film? You’d know…

    • KEVIN LOVES LITTLE BOYS
      August 19, 2016 at 12:33 pm

      GO BACK TO SUCKING OFF LITTLE BOYS AND MURDERING PEOPLE! DIDN’T THINK YOU COULD TYPE WITH LITTLE BOY COCK IN EACH OF YOUR HANDS KEVIN.

    • KEVIN LOVES LITTLE BOYS
      August 19, 2016 at 12:37 pm

      OH SHUT THE FUCK UP! GO BACK TO SUCKING OFF LITTLE BOYS AND MURDERING PEOPLE YOU FUCKING DIRT BAG! SEEMS LIKE YOU HAVE MASTERED THE ART OF TYPING WITH YOUR NOSE SINE YOU PROBABLY HAVE A LITTE BOY COCK IN EACH HAND.

      • Kevin Lynch
        August 19, 2016 at 1:46 pm

        Wow, such hostility here today.

        • Andrew McDonough
          August 19, 2016 at 1:58 pm

          Again… you’d know…

          Swing for the fences Kevie…

  • GoneWest
    August 19, 2016 at 11:25 am

    Kids must have been wasted off of like the 2 Yuenlings they shared

  • Bill
    August 19, 2016 at 11:18 am

    How do you drunk drive a horse? I’m pretty sure the horse will avoid wrapping itself around a tree all by itself…

    • FiestyLawyerLady
      August 19, 2016 at 11:25 am

      Well I’m assuming he has to direct the horse in some way? Not too sure because I don’t own a buggy or horse.

      This one time I went horse back riding and forgot that pressing my legs against the sides of their stomach meant “faster” to the horse… went from trotting to what felt like full speed. I peed a little… was terrified.

      “Oh my God I’m going to die” is all I said over and over again until it stopped. So, I’m assuming he has to command the horse in some way based off of my failed experience, lol…

      • Bill
        August 19, 2016 at 11:37 am

        I grew up around horses… Yes, with a buggy it’s different and there is the possibility of flipping the cart, driving it into a ditch, (and the horse wouldn’t know to avoid it) etc. I’m basically joking, there’s plenty that can go wrong. But as a teen, we’d ride out into the woods, get pretty wasted, basically lay on the top of the horse, and the horse would head home.

        • FiestyLawyerLady
          August 19, 2016 at 12:20 pm

          You’re lucky! Horses are beautiful, but very expensive. My younger brother has 2 and the stories about him having to wake up at 5am to feed doesn’t sound too fun and neither does the vet bill! Lol.

          • It's always about me
            August 19, 2016 at 4:18 pm

            More like you were doing the horse like the girls doing donkeys down in tijuana . Bob’s right crawl back in the horses ass you came out of

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            August 19, 2016 at 4:58 pm

            Sure thing Gregory.

          • BobnMic
            August 19, 2016 at 5:52 pm

            So this is it huh? Anybody that says anything disagreeable toward you – you are going to blame it on this Greg guy which inadvertently or cowardly directly references me? Firstly Fiesty – I thought you were going to leave here and go away? You said, “Cross my heart.” Twice. Proof positive that you are a fucking liar. And I want that dumb ass audio clip on YouTube taken down ASAP and I am fucking around about that. I do have family for God sake you fucking idiot.

            And I was getting ready to throw a block party with a DJ and very large speakers with a light show! It was going to be billed as the Farewell Fiesty Festival with special guest DJ Red Alert from NYC!

            But no. Another lie. You’re so obsessed not only did you not live up to your empty promise to leave here – you doubled and tripled down with about 10 more meaningless posts many of which were all trashing other commenters.

            Secondly – Shut the fuck up. Is that direct enough? There are several people in here getting real sick of you. Probably not getting more like have been. But hey – I’ll take the hit as usual because one can not reason with stupid and psychopath. That audio clip was your demise. Nice job dumb ass.

          • BobnMic
            August 19, 2016 at 5:54 pm

            *I am NOT fucking around about that.

          • Innocent Bystander
            August 19, 2016 at 9:45 pm

            So, here’s the thing Gregory, just viewed that video, because I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. And she only says Bob n mic, and Gregory Marsden on there… So could you explain to me how it’s a threat to your family?? It would only be a threat if you WERE IN FACT Greg Marsden!

          • Innocent Bystander
            August 19, 2016 at 9:48 pm

            In which case man, I got to say, you sure said some pretty horrible things about your wife!! Lol! How does she feel about that?

          • BobnMic
            August 19, 2016 at 10:19 pm

            Innocent Bystander – I use this screen name in other places besides this here and many in my family knows this. I never said anything horrible about my wife as I am not this Greg Marsden guy. And frankly I feel bad for the dude who has no idea apparently that this Fiesty ghetto trash fucknut is fucking with him on a daily basis without any solid basis ironically enough. And somehow I got dragged into it. How? I have no fucking clue.

            Anyway – I just happen to love my wife very much and I just recently argued with my own mother because she said something about her that I didn’t like. My wife came home from work last week and saw that I was steaming. I tried to blow it off but she is way too smart for that so I told her what had happened. My wife was cool about it realizing that my Mom is getting old and for some reason old people say fucked up things that they should keep to themselves like when they were younger. I don’t get old people. Is it some kind of fucking rite of passage to just blurt out fucked up shit and insults without any filter?

            Anyway I was thankful for that response from the bride, a tad bit overly protective I was per usual it’s in my DNA, but still was very pissed. Mom can’t help it though. That – I will realize sooner than later.

          • Innocent Bystander
            August 19, 2016 at 11:24 pm

            And frankly sir, I have to say, from the video it appears as though she is an articulate young lady driving around in a Mercedes, which supports her story of being a lawyer with a naughty side. I’d wager to say that girl’s got Carly Simon in her eight-track, oh, pardon me, CD player.

          • BobnMic
            August 20, 2016 at 12:41 am

            Well thank you kind lady (shit I am assuming you are a lady if not I am wicked sorry – guys are not this polite. They usually just say fuck off asshole) for debating an issue without getting into the gutter that your defendant does on a drop of a dime because that is all she knows.

            She is no lawyer. Did you her ramble on 110 miles an hour and all over the place with her thoughts with no real end to her beginning? Listen to it again – it is like listening to a person having a nervous break down or who just smoked crack that sounds like Rosie Perez from the hood. All of that vile homo shit she was saying is ok with you? Comeon really? She’s nuts pure and simple.

            Look I’m a dude and even I thought that was fucked up with that 4 minute rant coming from an uneducated trashed mouthed whore who loves to fuck with anybody at anytime. A lawyer for real? Comeon. I know her real name and it was verified by three different sources that she is no lawyer.

        • BobnMic
          August 19, 2016 at 10:46 pm

          I hope this at least in part answers your question Innocent Bystander. If not ask me anything because I have a lot to say about this but I will only do it in response to a question. Other than that I am back on topic where I want to be and should be.

          And for the love of God people here would all agree that this side shit show is getting all kinds-a-old. I was dragged in the middle of Freaky Fiesty and her x-husband whatever the relation is and wow we all get to know all of it.

          I for one could give a flying fuck about someone else’s personal life and failures.

          • Innocent Bystander
            August 19, 2016 at 11:17 pm

            Sorry bobnmic it doesn’t answer my question at all its quite confusing. After your post about you saying you use this name in other places I googled “bobnmic” and the only posts I ever see are on here, turtleboysports. The internet will save your posts they dont go away on forums, blogs, or websites. Im confused because saying something like “take the audio down” followed by “I have a family” means that your family would be affected by that audio being on the youtube. How is your family affected if you are bobnmic but NOT gregory marsden? Your family wouldn’t be affected if you weren’t Gregory. Thats all I am trying to say here. None of my business and I dont want to be a part of it but from the looks of it you have been discovered and the best way to make it all go away is if you are mum about it and stop fighting. Take a chapter out of the turtleboysports book when they discover someone that person either talks a lot and they are made fools of or they go away and everyone forgets. I think you should stop fighting it and maybe all of this will be behind you. Maybe next time dont start arguments unless you are completely anonymous and make no mistakes. Looks to me you thought your tracks were covered and they werent. You also said lawyerlady is nicole and from spencer on wefare but in that video she doesnt sound like a spencerite nor does her car appear to be one owned by a welfare junkie so you switch your plans and say shes ghetto from great brook valley and I dont know many people from great brook valley but I highly doubt they are driving new vehicles around and supporting a website like turtleboysports. There are many things not adding up so Im confused but eh what can I say. In my opinion I think you are who she says you are even though Im thrown off by you accusing her of being nicole when in fact that probably is your wife. Maybe you figured if you said shes nicole people will believe you because they would think no one in their right mind would post their own family info if it was really them, almost like a reverse psychology trick? I dont care about it personally I just have been reading all this stuff for a few weeks at this given point and I think you should just stop and let it go in a few weeks it will all be behind you like a distant memory. My two cents.

          • BobnMic
            August 19, 2016 at 11:55 pm

            Ya ok all said and received but Innocent Bystander you are so way off on this I don’t even know where to begin to explain but I will try again. And when you think about it why the fuck should I anyway? But I will try to again so here goes.

            I use this name screen name on Barstool Sports and other blogs mostly sports oriented websites like fantasy teams for example. Sorry TB. But I mostly post here under that same screen name and that is what comes up when you Google it. The older posts from wherever eventually go away or can be found on maybe page 10 or something.

            You say, “from the looks of it you have been discovered and the best way to make it all go away is if you are mum about it and stop fighting.” I say why stop fighting when you know that you are in the right and the accuser is baseless and, when asked time and time again, can not back it up with something called proof.

            You say again, “Take a chapter out of the turtleboysports book when they discover someone that person either talks a lot and they are made fools of or they go away and everyone forgets.” I say well that is exactly what she wants because I call her out time and time again on her (FiestyLAWYERlady) fraudulence very much in line with several chapters out of TurtleBoySports book.

            TBS calls out public bullshit. I comment on his topics. Frauds that comment who pretend to be either a college professor or a lawyer I call them out. Especially those that have a hair across their ass on other commenters for commenting that may be more insightful if not right out smarter than them. Many others call them out as well. This is how this works.

            So stay for the fun. They (the trolls) will eventually get bored and go away especially after they get bombarded with criticism. This is how this all works my friend. Welcome to the internet.

          • BobnMic
            August 20, 2016 at 12:11 am

            One more thing I left out Innocent Bystander. You say, “almost like a reverse psychology trick?”

            Thank you very much but I am really not that smart to attempt to pull that off and if I did more people than you would be all up in my shit. Plus take a ride through GBV some day IN THE DAYTIME. You won’t believe how many nice rides there are you’ll be amazed.

            Drug dealers make the short term big cash.

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            August 20, 2016 at 2:47 am

            I can prove it, and will… But I’m asking you for one last time to leave me alone. I don’t want to have to make another video with all of my screenshot proof. Greg, you changed your profile on FB to private, but you failed to realize I’m good at what I do. I took screenshots, of everything.

            Please, leave me alone. Stop bringing me up. Stop talking about me for no reason. You do it one more time on here, and I will make another video, this time, exposing you and your entire family. I promise.

            It’s Friday night.. the one or two nights I can go to bed late and not worry about being up early, I don’t want to waste it making a video… I really don’t.

            So, one more time you bother me on here, and I promise to make the video and spam that same video under every comment you ever make on this blog. Before I do that, I will have to apologize to someone first… because I’m going to break a promise I tried so hard to keep.

            Leave… Me… Alone…

  • Margaret Melican
    August 19, 2016 at 11:09 am

    There once was one who was driving.
    Kids on the roof barely surviving.
    Under an influence.
    Of some hooch with potence.
    Amish girls over these guys will be pining!

  • KJDS
    August 19, 2016 at 10:39 am

    Is it Rumspringa already?

    • Sad Lawyer Gentleman
      August 19, 2016 at 1:19 pm

      The guy that saw that one documentary once…

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