Mainstream Media Fails

The MSM Media Is Outraged After A Woke AF North Andover Homeowner Finds “Racial Slur” Scribbled On Pipe In Basement, Clearly Does Not Understand Modern Colloquial English Or Ever Listened To Any Rap Music

The MSM Media Is Outraged After A Woke AF North Andover Homeowner Finds “Racial Slur” Scribbled On Pipe In Basement, Clearly Does Not Understand Modern Colloquial English Or Ever Listened To Any Rap Music


Follow and Subscribe to Turtleboy podcasts on SoundCloud or iTunes by clicking here

Follow and like the Turtleboy Sports Returns, and Clarence Woods Emerson to keep up with the hilarious turtle rider commentary.

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at for more information.

If you like free speech and want to support what we’re doing, feel free to donate to the Turtle fund:







Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship.


If I took the mainstream media at face value I think I would be afraid to leave my house, for fear of troves of Neo-Nazis, sex traffickers and rapists prowling in the shadows of in every corner of this nation. Honestly. It just gets more and more absurd by the minute. This is a new one, though, where my gut instinct is not “gigantic race-baiting hoax” but instead, “incredibly gullible media led by a Demand-to-speak-to-the-manager Mary who has never in her life heard an NWA song”.


The Patch:

“Rachel Moffat told the Valley Patriot that she noticed the n-word etched into the pipe while reviewing a video she had made to document the problem during the October 19 visit by the utility’s workers.

“I was concentrating on seeing the gas leak. I didn’t notice the writing on the pipe at first, but when I looked at the video afterwards I noticed it. I can’t believe they would leave that in my home knowing I was making a video of the gas leak in the basement,” Moffat told the newspaper.

As of Wednesday, Columbia Gas had more than 1,700 workers in Lawrence, Andover and North Andover as part of the recovery effort from the Sept. 13 explosions that killed one and damaged or destroyed 131 buildings in the three communities. Thousands of people in the Merrimack Valley have been without gas service since the explosions.

“We are deeply disturbed by this situation. This type of behavior is unacceptable, highly offensive and violates our Code of Business Conduct, which all company employees and contractors must abide by. Once we were alerted to this situation, we reached out to the homeowner and personally apologized,” Columbia Gas spokesperson Judy Rakowsky said. “We are a company made up of a diverse work force and committed to upholding values that respect diversity in our company and the communities we serve. While we know the crews that were in the house at the time, we were not able to identify the individual(s) responsible. We continue to reinforce our Code of Business Conduct with our employees and contractors.””


Holy shit you guys, now even your indoor plumbing is racist! The video is posted online, so you can see for yourself this heinous hate crime perpetrated in some lady’s basement who incidentally has a laundry list of unrelated complaints against Columbia Gas right now as well.   


That pipe clearly has a line drawn on it, with the words, “cut my n***a” next to it. Now, I’m no structural engineer or plumber, and the only one laying pipe in my house is Mr. Bristol, but it would seem to me that this line and words are indicating where the line needs to be cut? Even disgusted Debbie up there seems to understand that. Just using a little deductive reasoning. And that has an “a” at the end, ladies and gents, not an “er”.

I’m just going to let the profound street poet, YG, explain:


“I said that I’mma ride for my motherfuckin’ ni**a
Most likely I’mma die with my finger on the trigger
I’ve been grindin outside all day with my ni**as
And I ain’t goin’ in unless I’m with my ni**as” 


You see, when you buy a vowel on the N word, you are expressing camaraderie. While technically “belonging” to POC, the term has been hijacked by every 12-40 something year old who owns a flat brimmed bulls hat, smokes blunts and enjoys the likes of the musical stylings above. I’m not saying Columbia Gas does not exclusively hire Fortune 500  go-getters, but North Andover is right next to Lawrence. And they don’t.

Usually I’d call something like this as a huge hoax aimed at either the acquisition of fame and stacks of donation cash, or spite and revenge towards a company this lady is clearly pretty salty with right now, but I just don’t think so. This looks like a case of a hysterical older broad whining to a media outlet so clueless they couldn’t even be bothered to vet the spelling through the author’s 14 year old nephew.

And of course Columbia Gas is just oh, so apologetic, because being anything else is PR suicide at this point. So they have to play along and take this shit very seriously, lest they be revealed as neo-nazi white supremacists plotting to blow up gas lines under black businesses and churches or some shit. Which is insane, because you have to be a hysterical boob to look at that video and think “racist monsters” instead of “ignorant GED trashrats”. Seriously. I wish Columbia Gas had grown a pair on this one, because Lord knows they have plenty of other actual apologies to be making right now.

7 Comment(s)
  • marilu
    November 16, 2018 at 3:21 pm

    Lmao i could only wish a worker would write that in my house.. laugh a little! it wont kill yaaa

  • Ray Patriarca
    Give em what they want
    November 16, 2018 at 1:43 pm

    They want black safe spaces. They want black holidays. They feel oppressed by the white privilege and the white man. They have black magazines. Black websites. Black TV.
    Want to end the bullshit?
    Give them black- only cities.
    No scary white folks to feel oppressed about.
    They can run it, fund it, staff it.
    No help from the evil white man.
    They stay there. The evil white man stays here.
    They want segregation? Give it to them.
    Good luck !

    • Jimmy the Greek
      November 16, 2018 at 1:47 pm

      They’d last less than one year. Put the house on that.

    • Whitey
      November 16, 2018 at 2:39 pm

      Give them the South but build a wall to keep them there.

  • JJ Walkers Dyn Oh Mite!
    November 16, 2018 at 12:39 pm

    Ok..first of all its not even done with the same marker. That’s obvious. Second, she noticed that AFTER she recorded it? Seriously? What a hoax. Jesus Christ, not only is she black, she’s stupid to

  • Big Lou
    November 16, 2018 at 12:36 pm

    If I was a black guy I’d be writing that on everything just for the lulz. Can’t call me racist, and I’ll piss hundreds of people off.

  • New Creative Methods Of Aggravating Other Races
    November 16, 2018 at 12:27 pm

    I wouldn’t want that fucking shit on my pipes, either.

    Can’t we just agree that black and white people are never really going to get along without the same fucking issues coming up over and over, and just segregate completely? Fucking enough already.

Comment on this Post


Boston Globe Covers 4-11 Boston College, But Not 12-1, #22 UMass
Boston Globe Apparently Will Run Any Article As Long As It Shits On Good Things Like The Ice Bucket Challenge
Boston Globe Writer Calls Dedham, Brookline, Walpole, Everett Football Coaches And Players Intolerant Homophobes, So Patriots Should Sign Michael Sam