Mainstream Media Fails

The Turtlegram’s Cartoonist Doesn’t Know Where Oxford Is, Even Though His Business Is In Oxford

Vote for Turtleboy Sports for best local blog 2015 by clicking here

Like the Turtleboy Safe Space Facebook page and the Free Turtleboy Facebook page to follow our posts when our other pages are arbitrarily suspended. If we ever get shut down for good, these will become the new Turtleboy Sports main Facebook page.

Click on the image to view all products in the Turtleboy Store.

Click on the image to view all products in the Turtleboy Store. Shirt are also available at the Union Tavern and The Buzz Barber Shop.

Want to have your business advert viewed over 2 million times per month? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.

 

 

 

 

The Turtlegram published this story the other day, about a bizarre fake kidnapping scam. Basically a girl at UConn gets a phone call from Queens and the people on the other end told her that her brother hit their grandma and instead of calling the cops they’re holding him hostage. They tell her she has to wire them $1,000 to a bank account in Puerto Rico or he’s dead. The Dad, who happened to be in Adams, MA, gets the same phone call, except they tell him that his daughter has been abducted. When the girl can’t wire them the full $1,000 because she needs to go to her bank to do that, they Google Chase Bank and find the closest one in Oxford. Except there isn’t really a Chase Bank in Oxford, so when the girl gets there they tell her to go to CVS and buy $280 worth of cell phone minutes so the kidnappers can recharge their phone. Then somehow the Honey Farms in Oxford called up the campus police at UConn and said they had the girl there crying, but when the State Cops got there she wouldn’t talk to them because she thought she had the kidnappers on the phone.

If this story seems confusing and makes little sense to you, then try reading the Turtlegram’s version of itIt might be the most poorly written article of all time. But even worse than that is the map that came along with the article:

Screen Shot 2016-03-26 at 3.11.59 PM

Anyone figure out what’s wrong with this map? Oh yea, Oxford is like, 30 miles from where they have it on this map. That red dot is either in Bellingham or Franklin, which is a complete different county.

For the record, this is where Oxford is:

Screen Shot 2016-03-26 at 3.33.05 PM

The best part is that the guy who drew this map is named Don Landgren Jr. So we Googled his name, and guess where his business is located out of?

Screen Shot 2016-03-26 at 3.34.20 PM

Yup. Oxford!! Can’t make this stuff up people!! This is an actual publication masquerading itself as a real newspaper. And businesses are dumb enough to pay them money to advertise on their site. We truly feel bad for Rotmans and all the other chumps who spend thousands of dollars a month to be seen by your grandparents and have their businesses associated with such hilarious incompetence.

 

 

We urge you to support the Turtleboy Sponsors by doing business with them. Without them none of this is possible. Click on any of them to check out their sites or Facebook pages.

Screen Shot 2015-12-28 at 1.20.12 PM

Screen Shot 2016-01-18 at 4.54.34 PM

unnamed (1)

079f2863-7fc7-4ed5-8736-67a1cbea0281

Screen Shot 2015-12-01 at 10.29.56 AM

unnamed-7

unnamed-19

Liberty Tax Preparation, Greenwood StreetWormtown Brewery, Union Tavern, Scavone Plumbing, Bennie’s Cafe, Craftech Restoration, JJM Insurance, Smokestack Urban Barbecue, Attorney Michael Erlich, Smitty’s Tavern, Julio’s Liquors, Solarreviews.net, The Gun Parlor Range, Attorney Anthony Salerno

Want to have your business advert viewed over 2 million times per month? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.

Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook

Click on the image to get your Turtleboy Sports Revolution hoodie or browse other merchandise from the Turtleboy store.

Click on the image to get your Turtleboy Sports Revolution hoodie or browse other merchandise from the Turtleboy store.

 

9 Comment(s)
  • mainitx
    January 24, 2017 at 11:14 pm

    Dude, that’s like where Bellingham is. What a dope!

  • John Galt
    March 26, 2016 at 8:41 pm

    I tried to follow that article this morning. It was written at a 2nd grade level, complete w ADD. Absolute novice work.

  • juror seven
    March 26, 2016 at 6:38 pm

    Where’s the piece about the guilty verdict for Peyton Bissell for child pornography? Four years in the slammer and more than likely getting slammed regularly. Add Peyton to the turtleboy graveyard.

  • Reddog
    March 26, 2016 at 6:00 pm

    Why did centerfolds close anyway?

    • BobnMic
      March 27, 2016 at 12:40 am

      Seriously, bummer!

  • KarmaPolice
    March 26, 2016 at 4:21 pm

    The copy desk should have caught that. Oh, wait, it’s The Telegram.

  • Jafreese
    March 26, 2016 at 4:08 pm

    I haven’t set foot in Oxford since Centerfolds closed

  • Boss Tweed
    March 26, 2016 at 4:00 pm

    Langrens cartoons are AWFUL, just plain AWFUL. The T & G pays someone for this crap.

    • Koko's Bills
      March 27, 2016 at 11:30 am

      True. But his cartoons are far superior to EVERYTHING else in that “paper”, especially the two One-Note columnists.

Comment on this Post

*

RELATED POSTS
Boston Globe Covers 4-11 Boston College, But Not 12-1, #22 UMass
Boston Globe Apparently Will Run Any Article As Long As It Shits On Good Things Like The Ice Bucket Challenge
Boston Globe Writer Calls Dedham, Brookline, Walpole, Everett Football Coaches And Players Intolerant Homophobes, So Patriots Should Sign Michael Sam