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Vote For Turtleboy’s Endorsements For Worcester Magazine’s Best Of 2015

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Yesterday we announced our endorsement for turtle rider Margaret Melican for the Worcester Magazine 2015 Best Local Poet award. Today we would like to share with you the rest of our endorsements and we urge you to vote for them by clicking here. It does require you to use an email address so that they can validate you (which is dumb and pointless since you can just make up a burner email address), but they won’t flood you with spam or anything. This is why Turtleboy has at least 20 burner email addresses ready to go at all times and so should you.

You have to vote for at least 20 of the categories in order for your ballot to be counted, so here’s who we recommend you vote for:

Let’s start with the most obvious – best local blogger:

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If we don’t win this award back to back years then you know the system is fixed. We know that Old Balls is gonna be voting for himself at least 30 times, one for each leap year he’s lived through. So it’s important that the right blog win this award. We anxiously look forward to Walter Bird having no choice but to hand us this award and provide us with a free meal yet again.

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Her poetry speaks for itself:

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The People’s Councilor Michael Gaffney has revolutionized what it means to be a City Councilor. We’ve never seen anything like him before. The fact that he wasn’t afraid of the political consequences of embracing Turtleboy Sports shows you what a risk taker and free thinker the People’s Councilor is. Make no mistake about it, without him all these Mosaic shenanigans would still be going on.


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She might be new, but she’s off to a great start by leading the charge to put Maureen Binienda in as the Superintendent. Turtleboy Nation got behind her campaign and it paid dividends with a strong second place finish, dethroning both Tracy Novick and Hilda Ramirez. Brian O’Connell and Molly McCullough are also great choices as well.


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So proud to have Kate Campanale as a State Represntative. Feel bad for anyone who doesn’t have her. She took on an entrenched political machine and won and she’s been very open to her constituent’s concerns, especially when it comes to Mosaic and the closing of the Brookfield Police barracks.



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This family owned business has been doing business in Tatnuck Square since the beginning of time. They’ll find you the best deals for home, life, and car insurance.


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Easily the best blue-collar watering hole you’ll find in the city. A turtle riding supporter since the beginning. If you haven’t been down there for a brew-ski what are you waiting for?


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They took a chance on the Turtle when no one else would. Turtleboy Tuesdays has been a hit sensation on the Worcester airwaves for over a year now.



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Located on Canterbury Street, our man Vinh will hook you up with a great price and quality workmanship. Make sure to mention the Turtle.


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Scavone Plumbing and Heating is a lot like Turtleboy itself. It’s fought the machine head on when Martha Coakley unjustly came after them a few years ago. And yet they’re still around and still doing great business for the people of Worcester County.


Best Columnist – Janice Harvey (forgot to screenshot this one)

You have to admire the stones on this woman. She’s a teacher who isn’t afraid to speak out, which is such a rare thing these days. When North High teachers were being told that they were unable to reach their students because they’re a bunch of old white women, Janice Harvey wasn’t afraid to tell them that they were wrong. She wasn’t afraid to admit that she was color blind and she took on the PC police headfirst. And for that she was essentially forced out of the building. How can you not vote for her for best columnist with the year she just had?



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If you like beer, wine, or alcohol, then take a trip down Route 9 to Julio’s in Westboro. You’ll feel like a kid who snuck into Paris Cinema for the first time. It’s booze selection heaven.


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After we nominated someone else last year they invited us to their store in Millbury for cupcakes. It was unbelievably delicious.


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It’s actually spelt “Markos” Jewelers. We don’t normally buy jewelry, but their owner Abe has been doing business in Worcester for years and people rave about the kind of person he is.


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The only place to get the fresh cut on the west side is from Heather the Wonder Barber on at The Buzz. She was working at Kay’s for years but she established such a loyal clientele that she took a chance a few years back and opened her own shop. She’s been in business for years now and continues to do quality work.


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Never had a tattoo or a piercing, but if I did, I’d go to Zaza Ink. Good people who support the Turtle.


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Bennie’s has been with the Turtle for almost a year now and they serve some FANTASTIC food. Huge portions too.



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As if there could possibly be anyone else. Best pulled pork this side of the Mississippi.


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I wish the Union Tavern was around back when Turtleboy used to be in his hayday. The crowd’s down there are the best and it’s all because the bartenders serve the drinks right. All we had was Leitrims and that place smelled like a frathouse basement and played the same horrible soundtrack over and over again. Yet we still kept coming. Every. Single. Weekend.


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This place doesn’t get nearly the credit it deserves. Located right at the Hope Ave rotary, everyone from Auburn and the Webster Square area can tell you how amazing the breakfast sandwiches and pancackes are at this place. The coffee is even better. Also comes with hilarious commentary from the regulars when they argue about politics.



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Obviously. Wormtown isn’t just a Turtleboy sponsor, they’re the fastest growing beer company in the state and for good reason.


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Either this or Coney Island right? Luckily we conducted a scientific experiment back in the summer and came up with Hot Dog Annie’s in Leicester.


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Kind of a weird category. I mean, you can get takeout from anywhere right? So basically it’s asking, “which place has the best food but you don’t really wanna eat it there?” And the food at the Boynton is so good, but sometimes the wait to eat there can be a little long, so we get take out there a lot. The cherry pepper calamari and buffalo chicken pizza are to die for.


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Turtle riders turned us on to this east side gem last year and we’ve been going there on the regular ever since. Easily the best Italian grinders in the city. Turtleboy went there probably 2 or 3 times and the guy already had the exact specifics of the way we like the sandwich memorized.


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This place is on Route 9 in Northboro, right past the Shrewsbury line, and is well worth the trip. I like my Mexican food brought to me and cooked by real Mexican people. I’m picky like that. And this is easily the best Mexican food we’ve tasted in a long, long time.


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Never eaten at this place and never tasted Middle Eastern food before but everyone swears by it and we saw that one of their owners like our Facebook page. Sold.


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This was a really hard choice, but Pepe’s just makes a really mean pie. Check em out on our Turtleboy Pizza Tour de Worcester County.11102930_1573553442927933_8771686774382761107_n-1


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This was a close second for pizza, but they make lots of other delicious stuff over there at the end of Grafton Hill. Highly recommend going down to this place, grabbing a beer, eating a pizza, and stuffing your face with a cannoli immediately afterwards.


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LOVE Birkbecks on Mill Street. Their $5 appetizer menu includes an order of buffalo chicken mac and cheese which can best be described as a melt in your mouth orgasm.


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A classic Worcester establishment with a huge menu and an even better venue. Once again, real Irish people with a real Irish restaurant and tons and tons of real Irish beer. Can’t beat Brendan’s world famous Irish potato pizza.


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A lot of people go here for the pizza. Turtleboy goes for the wings. Try the breaded buffalo and you’ll thank me later.


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Tons of TV’s. Great crowd. Great ownership. No better place to watch the big game then down at the Perfect Game on Water Street.



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We’re recommending them for everything related to these categories because they’re such good people and they do such good business. After they came under attack by the Internet Mafia a couple months back, we backed them up in a blog and they invited Turtleboy and Mrs. Turtleboy in for a couple’s massage. They are such good people and deserve your support.

So there you have it. Vote early. Vote often. Vote Turtle.


We urge you to support the Turtleboy Sponsors by doing business with them. Without them none of this is possible. Click on any of them to check out their sites or Facebook pages.

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Tattoos Massachusetts

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Click on the image to get your Turtleboy Sports Revolution hoodie or browse other merchandise from the Turtleboy store.

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8 Comment(s)
  • Concerned but assholey citizen
    March 18, 2016 at 5:31 pm

    Michaelangelo’s barber shop in Crompton Collective is expensive, but they earn every dollar. I gotta go with them for best barber.

    B.T.’s is best bbq, apologies to the stack. And best pizza has to go to either Anzio’s in Grafton or Volturno. Paesano’s and Pepe’s are good, but not close to the same level.

    Also Birchtree for best lunch. Their sandwiches are nothing short of mouth orgasms. Plus tons of junior smoke college girls hang out there.

    Best takeout you gotta go Midnight Munchies at Tom’s deli. Their pierogis are the single greatest side dish ever and the sandwiches weigh pounds, and only cost like 7 bucks.

  • Wabbitt
    March 16, 2016 at 2:21 pm

    I’m willing to go full Turtle for the most part, but Carl’s Diner in Oxford is my vote for best breakfast. A side of bacon thereally is a big old heaping plateful. It’s the Bennie’s of breakfast food.

  • John Mahoney
    March 16, 2016 at 1:47 pm

    Mahoney’s Pub deserves atleast an honorable mention Turtleboy. Always have been proud supporters past and present.

  • Rob
    February 27, 2016 at 1:29 pm

    BTs smokehouse drops a steamy dump on smokestack! If you’ve never been take a bone cruise out to rte 20 in Sturbridge. So worth the trip!

    • TargetPractice
      March 16, 2016 at 3:19 pm

      My Man! lol, smokestack is serviceable and close, but BT’s is on another level. The sauces and pickled habanero carrots are so good. Its the perfect blunt ride away, and it’s BYOB with a liquor store next door.

  • IgnoranceBreedsIgnorance
    February 19, 2016 at 12:48 pm

    Going to have to vote for Tattoo Project over ZaZa and Shiraz for Middle Eastern. The rest is on point!

  • Turtle-bowl
    February 17, 2016 at 7:27 am

    Selling yourself short with only “best blog”. I voted Turtleboy for best blog, best news, best radio personality… and I think there was at least one more. Sorry, I got into Wanda’s stash earlier.

  • Wwy
    February 17, 2016 at 1:02 am

    Best tattoo/piercing, or where you go to get an attention seeking tatoo or piercing because no one likes ya,maybe leave that out so this country can get back to normal people.

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