There Is A Wooden Bear That Appears To Be Forcing Her Cub To Perform Oral Sex On Her On Heard Street

Kids are gonna have a lot of questions about this as they walk to Heard Street Elementary School every day.

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So it’s come to our attention that a local craftsman on Heard Street in Worcester has elected to put his latest artwork out for public viewing:


Oh………no. No, no, no, no. Not good. Keep in mind this is right near Heard Street Elementary School, so young children every day now must ask their parents why that wooden bear is forcing her children to felate her, and why the mother is pushing the baby’s head into her crotch.

Look at Momma Bear’s face too:


“What the fuck you lookin at? Keep walking bitch.”

I’m sure the artist had fine intentions when he made this wooden sculpture of a mother bear with her cubs. But at no point in the history of mammals has a mother ever fed her babies in that manner. The bottom line is that if you’re gonna become a wooden sculture artist and turn a tree in your front yard into a work of art, you should probably go into it with a better gameplan. Just sayin.

P.S. If I’m living in this guy’s house, the first project I’m doing is getting some new siding. To me that takes priority over wooden bear blowjob sculptures. But that’s just me.



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21 Comment(s)
  • Dave
    December 3, 2016 at 8:21 pm

    I am saddened by this whole foolish, immature thread. I am saddened by the fact that so many people follow this rabble rouser. He is simply a coward hiding behind the internet. It pains me to respond here because that is simply what he wants. I am only doing this because I have heard so much about this particular topic.
    To begin with let me clear up what some misinformed morons have felt empowered to be critical of, his choice of how to spend his money,,,, that worn out house in the picture is NOT his house. Unfortunately the T&G photographer didn’t realize how his photograph would interpreted by uninformed Turtle Boy followers. The tree that stood there was becoming dangerous with many falling limbs. And as you all have remarked,it is across the street from a grammar school. Many parents wait there for their children, many with smaller ones in tow. So it was with the school parents and kids in mind that as partly the reason for it’s removal. Cost at the time is the reason for the whole trunk to not be removed. Over time the idea of a sculpture took hold. After a chance meeting with Carl, and when he could afford it ( for all you financial wizards who know how someone else should wisely spend THEIR hard , honestly EARNED money).
    It seems to me that this entire sad thread was started by a pervert. My fear is that he is possibly a pedaphile predator, trying to entice conversations from some of those school kids . I am also surprised at how many art critics are on here. I am glad that you are not interpreting pieces for our Worcester Art Museum.
    This was supposed to be something positive. Something the school kids could enjoy. Something the neighbors and passers-by could enjoy. Let’s see, it supports the arts. It supports a local artist. It beautifies the neighborhood. It turns a simple tree trunk into something fun. It di OKdn’ destroy anything. It is environmentally safe. Shame on everyone who has tried to make something bad out of this. If Turtle Boy thinks that this is journalism he is sorely mistaken. This is exactly what is going wrong with this country. And what makes it worse is that someone like Turtle Boy has followers.
    I will not ever follow him or his blog. I will not support any of the businesses who support it and I would urge everyone else to do the same. Had it not been for hearing of this outside of the internet, I would never have even known about Turtle Boy. So responding to this is not hypocritical. I just felt it necessary.

  • pajo
    December 2, 2016 at 4:08 pm

    Nothing wrong with that siding, That’s just bear poop…

  • Turtle boy is poison in our community
    December 1, 2016 at 11:57 pm

    When will you just go away!! Your sick twisted opinion obviously means nothing to the masses (I bet you get a rise out of the anger you create)……and you a father yourself posting this…..shame on you!!

  • KAT
    December 1, 2016 at 5:53 pm

    That’s what turtle boy must think when he picks up children in that position

  • Fuck you turtleboy
    December 1, 2016 at 3:11 pm

    You are seriously an asshole….. The home owner didn’t carve that (he paid a local artist to do it) and that’s not even the house it belongs to in the picture…….. Do you even check facts before you post them? & what the fuck is the point of this article, other than bashing someone’s artwork? Nice. You’re a fucking loser. Someone put their time & effort into that…. Haterrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

  • Billy Bousquet jr
    November 30, 2016 at 9:41 pm

    Who ever wrote this article is a Total DOUSHE NOZZLE.

  • Sandra
    November 30, 2016 at 6:45 pm

    you are one sick idiot Turtle Boy I think the artist done a beautiful job what I see there is a mother playing with her children and with the sculpture being next to a school the children see something positive in that which is love and compassion get your mind out of the gutter.

  • John Vandiver
    November 30, 2016 at 5:13 pm

    You are a sick individual. What you should write about is how the artist back in 2013 started a journey walking from Boston to Los Angeles honoring the men and women who are and have served our Country.

  • Patty
    November 30, 2016 at 2:45 pm

    I don’t think children walking by will think anything but a mama bear picking up her baby.why must you make something negative out of something so positive. Job well done

  • Debbie McArdle
    November 30, 2016 at 2:42 pm

    You really are a special kind of asshole! Only a deviate mind would come up with this nonsense. Elementary school children don’t know anything about fellatio unless you tell them you moron!! Don’t you have anything better to write about other than thrashing a local artist. Any normal mind looking at this knows that the mama bear is picking up her baby cub…….SMFH

  • wtatnuckgangsta
    November 30, 2016 at 9:47 am

    Looks like Turtleboy gots some competition.

  • Mama Bear?
    November 30, 2016 at 9:26 am

    Of course it has to be the MOTHER bear. Couldn’t be the FATHER bear could it TBS? Wouldn’t it make more sense to make the joke of it being the FATHER bear since performing female oral sex isn’t such a “face front” act? Or did you just assume since the baby bears were hanging off that it HAD to be the female bear since fathers are so “hands off?”

  • Lincolntf
    November 30, 2016 at 9:14 am

    It looks a bit weird, but I don’t think incestuous ursine cunnilingus will be the first thing to spring to anyone’s mind. And it definitely looks like the bear sculpture is on the near side of the chainlink fence and the peely house is on the far side, probably different properties. Anyway, I give high marks to the sculptor for his efforts, so-so grades for execution.

  • Sul
    November 30, 2016 at 7:28 am

    Do better research. The statue is at a different house then the house pictured. I’m assuming this is a bad attempt at satire, but shows how sloppy you’ve become with fact gathering

    • Wabbitt
      November 30, 2016 at 5:25 pm

      So you’re saying the author photoshopped that ridiculous carving in front of a different shitty house? Or did he go full bore and actually move the tree?

      Please enlighten us plebeans in the audience.

      • Sul
        November 30, 2016 at 7:46 pm

        The house belongs to the next door neighbor. Again don’t let facts get in the way of a short satirical piece

  • ninja turtleboy
    November 30, 2016 at 5:48 am

    turtleboy, how is this different than the turtleboy statue?! still love ya

    • Mama Bear
      November 30, 2016 at 9:39 am

      Good one

    • Turd Burglestein
      November 30, 2016 at 1:12 pm

      The differerence is Turtleboy has a dick. Mama bear has a furry vagina.

  • Sal Monella
    November 30, 2016 at 5:38 am

    Relax. It is art representing the desire of snowflakes to crawl back into their mother’s womb post Trump’s election.


    • Mama Bear
      November 30, 2016 at 9:38 am

      Now that’s a better interpretation than the one the article’s author wrote about.

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