Turtleboy Reveals The Winner Of Turtleboy Ratchet Madness On Epic Turtleboy Live Show With One Shining Moment Montage

Turtleboy Reveals The Winner Of Turtleboy Ratchet Madness On Epic Turtleboy Live Show With One Shining Moment Montage

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And the winner of the first annual Turtleboy Ratchet Madness Tournament is……..



Oops, there’s been a mistake!! Sorry Guttupermuppet, but you got your ass beat:

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And the winner is Trashley Losapi-ho in a landslide!!

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Although those results are bullshit. I was definitely team Trashley, but the voting was obviously rigged. Next year we’ll make it so you can’t vote a million times, which is clearly what the Trashley people did here. I still respect the results and think if everyone voted once Trashley would’ve won in a close one. Then again, if you inspire that level of hatred in people, you kind of earned the title. Just sayin.

Anyway, we did a little “One shining moment” montage video on the Turtleboy Live show tonight, highlighting all of our ratchets. Everyone wanted to talk about the Mothers of the South Shore, so we talked about that a lot towards the end. The video starts right around the 4:30 mark. Enjoy:

We’re gonna do the Ratchet Madness Tournament once a year, and next year’s bracket won’t feature any of these ratchet. Can’t wait to see who the one seeds will be. Up next we’re gonna do a SJW bracket. See ya on Tuesday at 9:30 for our next episode. We love you all so much and we would never charge you a membership fee because we know you’d tell us to go fuck ourselves. That’s why turtle riders are the greatest people on earth.



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23 Comment(s)
  • King of SJW's
    April 30, 2017 at 12:08 pm

    I think everyone deserves a ribbon or a trophy. So maybe they weren’t the biggest dirtbag. At least they participated.

  • April 30, 2017 at 10:25 am

    As much as I love SSTG and how hard she worked on GutterMuppet… (Don’t kill me lol), I’m glad Ashley won… I was praying she did. Someone who could do what she does and still have access to sensitive information and employment is deserving of the title!

  • Stu Pidazzo
    April 30, 2017 at 8:35 am

    Wow! Quist has really been working out! Seriously though, why is there a topless man presenting the trophy at a beauty pageant? I thought they were supposed to be all classy and shit.

  • Whatever
    April 29, 2017 at 7:04 pm

    You realize that when you watch the video here your face is in the reflection to the left. Not that I care, but you might want to crop that out *shrugs*

  • April 29, 2017 at 3:44 pm

    The Turtleboy should start a new feature on local restaurant dining reviews . I think the Worcester swagazine and the gazette newspaper Reviews are rigged . And one of the phantom brothers. Actually came yo s city council meeting to speak against food trucks in Wormtown do you know I don’t trust the wildcrats food reviews either . It’s time we got real information .

  • itsjustme
    April 29, 2017 at 3:36 pm

    I didn’t even realize that we could vote more than one.

    • Troubled Nostrils
      April 29, 2017 at 8:45 pm

      ITSJUSTME, you must be a Republican.

  • Flat Brimmed Turtle
    April 29, 2017 at 3:07 pm

    If there is Turtle god, then next year the crowning of the winner should be held at the food court, near the Lids at the Ol Searstown mall………..I am not calling it Whitney Field either!
    The talents that these people have displayed over the last year has been eye opening………..
    I would happily pay a one time fee of $50 to make sure this happens, or buy a magnet!

  • Vote Morse Out
    April 29, 2017 at 2:51 pm

    Honorable mention should have gone to Alex Morse who got three people killed.

    • Sterling Turtle Rider
      May 3, 2017 at 1:16 am

      I’m willing to bet he will be a top seed in the SJW tournament that is soon to follow, and I bet he’ll go far!

  • fordsnharleys
    April 29, 2017 at 10:47 am

    No one is hated more than a connected public employee who has displayed over the top behavior worthy of termination.

  • bigdaddy
    April 29, 2017 at 10:35 am

    so many ratchets so little time..

  • White Pride White Power
    April 29, 2017 at 1:39 am

    If it’s not a black person than what the fuck is the point of this site?

    • True Reality Speaks
      Tired of Don't Snitch Pussies
      April 29, 2017 at 9:37 am

      For trolls like you, it’s to get some attention so you feel relevant?

      • White Pride White Power
        April 29, 2017 at 4:34 pm

        Aw, poor nigger. You mad?

    • Stu Pidazzo
      April 30, 2017 at 8:28 am

      Not getting what you want? That’s a shame! We’ll really miss you! (End sarcasm)

    April 29, 2017 at 12:39 am

    Hey Uncle Turtle Boy you need a fucking Valium bro, SLOW DOWN you sound like a Crack addict trying to tell everyone why they broke up.with their EX. Let NSTB talkaline about her story since she wrote the fucking thing. Your Bulldozing her and it’s not kool. NSTB I’m waitin

    • Spanks
      April 29, 2017 at 1:01 am

      They didn’t have a good connection with NSTB today. There was a 10 second delay between them, which makes it hard to have a conversation, so she couldn’t really chime in. That’s why he was doing all the talking.

        April 29, 2017 at 1:09 am

        I know dumbass but he could have said NSTB you talk about your article and when you finished I will keep going. Easy fix. Did you hear her voice? It’s heaven compared Uncle Crack is Whack.

        • April 30, 2017 at 10:14 am

          You think it’s an easy fix. I was on live several times. This past Tuesday when I was on live there was the same delay issue. Me, I don’t give a fuck I will keep talking right through the delay because that’s just me… Its not easy to throw me off. Just know that expecting the host to be quiet during a delay is not easy.

          NSTB could have taken a pause and the host could think she’s done so he starts talking and she wouldn’t hear that for 15 seconds so now they are talking over one another and that becomes very annoying to the listeners. So unless you’ve been on live during a delay, you shouldn’t criticize. It makes you the same kind of person who tells someone with kids how to be a parent.

          • TIG OLE BITTIES
            April 30, 2017 at 3:09 pm

            Boy you are Fiesty lol, I like that. All Uncle Turtle had to say 1 time was NSTB there is a fuckin delay so tell everyone about this story and say ur done when ur done. 10.secs later she would have heard it and we would have been able to hear the author of the story tell us about, instead of I guy that had 1 too.many turbo shots in his Dunkins. I love your blog but boy say 1 non affectionate thing and Fiesty wants a throw down. It’s all good doll no worries.

          • April 30, 2017 at 4:55 pm

            I thought I was being nice! I’m just saying… criticism is fine and dandy but just letting you know it’s easier said than done.

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