WTF

TurtleBoy Sports Interviewed Drunken, Swearing, Magnificent St. Bonaventure Fans At Atlantic Ten Tournament

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So if you’re a regular reader of Turtleboy Sports you know that they’re basically obsessed with our blog. When they beat us earlier this year it was the highlight of their miserable existence. Before I wrote the blog making fun of them for rushing the court early against a team that was no longer ranked afterwards, I didn’t even know people liked this team. I just figured they were some loser school from Buffalo that wore poop colored jerseys.

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Well, it turned out that there are tens of thousands of these people. The blog I wrote on them got like a million hits in 24 hours. Most of them were just nudniks claiming to represent a catholic school that liked to call me a fa**ot liberal. Then a freshman smokeshow named Hannah Gordon did an expose for their school newspaper, because obviously Turtleboy Sports is by far the biggest thing to ever happen to their terrible school.

Well, we had our reporters in Brooklyn this weekend at the Atlantic Ten Tournament, and let me tell you, it was a Bonnie infestation like you’ve never seen before. Like a plague these infrahumans made the long trip from some cow town no one’s ever heard of near Buffalo, to the beautiful beatnik capital of America – Brooklyn. The Bonnies were seeded ninth in the tournament, beat Lasalle, and then pulled the huge upset of top seeded St. Louis on Friday.

So needless to say, these animals were FIRED UP for their inevitable loss in the semifinals against eventual champion St. Joe’s. Our reporters began their adventure by jogging over to the Barclay’s Center from their hotel. Of course when they entered the lobby, this is what they discovered.

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Because why WOULDN’T two balding UMass super fans/TurtleBoy Sports reporters be crushing Bud Lights at noon the day after a devastating UMass loss to George Washington?

Our reporter finally got to the Barclay’s outside the Barclay’s Center an hour before the game, to meet some actual, real, live St. Bonaventure fans in their element. Obviously he couldn’t tell them he was a reporter for TurtleBoy Sports because if you’ve ever been to the zoo before, you know that you’re never supposed to feed the animals. Instead he masqueraded as an Atlantic 10 sports journalist and our cover was kept so that we could observe this beautiful creatures in their natural environment.

What he witnessed, and what you are about to see is very disturbing. Turtleboy Sports is a family blog, and thus we frown on this sort of behavior and language. However, sometimes reality is very, very ugly, and cannot be reported in any other manner. You’ve been warned.

Here’s the first people we encountered. Pay special attention to what the lovely lady does at the 6 second mark.

That young lady’s vocabulary contains the following words: “Fuck you,” “UMass sucks,” and “Yes, yes, yes, yes.” She’d fit in well at UMass. If you were wondering why she yelled “f*** you” at the six second mark, it was because a VCU fan was minding her own business and walking by her. I’m sure this lovely lady knew that the Bonnies were playing St. Joe’s that day and not VCU, and I’m sure she actually follows college basketball.

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The reporter posed the question about the possibility of seven Atlantic Ten teams getting into the tournament. The young lady seemed pretty convinced the answer was “yes.” Probably should’ve asked her to name three other teams in the conference. Could’ve been some great video.

The ringleader was clearly the kid with the USA jacket.

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I’m also 100% sure that everyone in this picture is a Buffalo Bills fans. People don’t believe me when I say that Bills fans are the most offensive people on earth. This is exhibit A. These young Buffalonians are in their infant stages of hooliganism. Wait until they become full grown adults. They truly develop into a sight to see.

Unfortunately the questions about TurtleBoy Sports were cut short with the arrival of Sister Margaret, who apparently is the President of the “University.” The interview thus was ended and replaced with chants of “Sister Margaret” and hugs.

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It was loud as hell in the foyer of the Barclay’s Center. Every once in a while these wild beasts just started yelling, “Bonas!!!,” “Bonnas are back baby,” “Let’s go Bonas,” and “F*** VCU,” over and over again. Here’s what it sounded like at around 12:30, an hour before tip off.

That place was jam packed by 1:00 and the noise was deafening so we went outside where some fat bastard Bona fan seemed to be itching for a foight.

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Turns out he was just running around like a bowling ball trying to knock down stray pins. Evidently this is the ritual of the Bona fan. Once he was done aimlessly running around while attempting to keep control of his triple XL poop colored hooded sweatshirt, we asked him his thoughts on the game. His answer was shocking.

That’s a clown question bro. Obviously St. Bonaventure is gonna kick the shit out of VCU. Wait, who are we playing again? One thing that is definitely without question, is that that fat bastard took a monster sized Bona dump in the Barclay’s Center at halftime.

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Then we had the opportunity to talk to a gaggle of young maidens who liked to make liberal use of the “f” word. Bi4AMg9IQAAID4XThese girls clearly knew a lot about college basketball and wanted to talk some serious hoops. Just kidding. They just wanted to drink beer and yell a lot. God bless America.

That girl officially won the Atlantic Ten tournament by herself. Who’s gonna win the Atlantic Ten Tournament? “F***ing winning.” Best. Answer. Ever.

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By far the most knowledgeable fans we found were these three bros. They actually had heard of UMass before, and seemed to know something about it besides “F*** TurtleBoy” and “F*** UMass.”

The two teams with the biggest fan bases in Brooklyn this weekend were EASILY St. Bonaventure and VCU. Our reporter saw less than 20 St. Joe’s fans go through the gates at Barclay’s. One fan shared the same sentiment that most of us feel when he said, “I didn’t even know St. Bonaventure had fans.” 

Well they do, and they’re magnificent. VCU I understand the following for. They’re a giant school. But St. Bonaventure is still a mystery to me. They’re like half the size of Lowell High School and they perpetually suck at basketball. Their claim to fame is that they’ve had five of the most corrupt congressmen in American history as alumni.

Unfortunately for Turtleboy Sports they lost to got their ass beat by St. Joe’s, thus preventing the wild spectacle that would’ve been a VCU/St. Bonaventure final. Nevertheless, they’ve left us all with some amazing visuals that you can only see if you make a personal visit up to Buffalo to see these savages. They truly are a once in a lifetime experience. Just make sure to leave the kids at home.

Feel free to share your thoughts to keep the conversation going.

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115 Comment(s)
  • Let The Big Dawg Eat
    March 19, 2014 at 3:23 pm

    This Blog is CHEEKS

  • Eat my Farts
    March 18, 2014 at 2:11 pm

    Turtle Boy is FartFart

  • Larry Doty
    March 17, 2014 at 11:11 pm

    lol Tim, Alexa is a magical website that calculates your websites traffic ranking. TurtleBoy Sports has gone up over 100,000 spots in 24 hours because people like you click on the blog. SEO is an acronym for Search Engine Optimization. It measures how often you come up on Google and other search engines. The more traffic a site gets the better its SEO. Google image: Jerry Palm bracketology, Michael Sam boyfriend, Kaitlin Pearson, Brian Boitano. You did that. I’m sure TurtleBoy is very thankful.

    • Larry Doty's Biggest Fan
      March 18, 2014 at 12:41 pm

      You act like he has a future in writing. Yeah, any company looking to hire people to write for them will surely be impressed with this. If he’s so thankful, he can come over to Bonaventure and thank us personally.

      • Chris Curtis
        March 18, 2014 at 9:08 pm

        Newsflash: I own and operate this blog. I profit off of it with advertisements. Why would I wanna work for some dumbass newspaper that makes me write dumbass stories about dumbasses?

  • Dear Lord
    March 17, 2014 at 11:09 pm

    I pray to dear God and Saints Francis, Clare, and Bonaventure themselves that you aren’t actually a journalism major.

    (Please don’t a real journalism student, please don’t be a real journalism student, please don’t be a real journalism student…)

    • Bill Swain
      March 18, 2014 at 8:41 am

      Is it possible to get a Welding Certificate from your journalism department? I’m interested!!!

  • Your buddy from Loserville
    March 17, 2014 at 10:15 pm

    What are fans supposed to do? Get under the other teams skin, right? Kind of funny that we got under your team’s skin and under yours. It’s also funny how you bring up the fans being drunk, because no one drinks at a sporting events right? How about college students? They don’t drink either? And I guess egging them on makes it all their fault right? I can feel your hatred though, I really do. Losing to some “no name team” that was able to not only able to piss off your entire team, but annoy you enough that you took the time to write a blog, go to the Barclays Center to interview fans, then blog about us again really seems you have a little obsession. Lastly, your “family blog” is trying to slander an entire university. I’m glad you’re taking the high road and took the loss like a man. If I had kids, I’m sure the first thing I would want them to read is your blog. Then maybe they can make their own biased, immature blog too! My suggestion? Probably stop blogging because the second people find out who this is and not just someone hiding behind a computer screen, your future in journalism is going down worse than UMass did back on January 29th.

    • Larry Doty
      March 17, 2014 at 10:47 pm

      1. You clicked on the blog. +1 for TurtleBoy.
      2. You gave up several minutes of your life reading the blog. +1 for TurtleBoy.
      3. You gave up several more minutes typing out that entire paragraph. +1 for TurtleBoy.
      4. You just helped improve TurtleBoy’s Alexa rating, and SEO, thus increasing his advertising revenue. +1 for TurtleBoy.
      5. You gave him EXACTLY the reaction he wanted. +1 for TurtleBoy.

      You lose.

      • Tim
        March 17, 2014 at 10:54 pm

        …. Who cares about TutleBoy’s blog…. you gave up more time commenting all over the place… WTF is and who cares about Alexa rating and SEO…. Does he have revenue??? …. You lost it seems.

        Don’t make some smart remark back either.

  • Sbu
    March 17, 2014 at 8:40 pm

    In breezing through the comments it’s obvious that these guys are out to pick a fight with anyone from any school. Bonas isn’t the first and won’t be the last. That’s fine. To each their own if that’s how they want to spend their time.

    Umass may be harder to get into but go cares? Bonnie’s produces countless fine young grads who go onto successful lives as does umass. Quibbling over a 3rd of a letter grade in high sxhool is pointless. We love Bonas as much as we love our families. It’s home. People outside don’t understand and never will. And that’s okay too. Such is life. I wouldn’t give up my time at Bonas for a 10 million dollar a year salary.

    • Blong
      March 17, 2014 at 8:43 pm

      Best post made in this comment section. Someone finally gets it. Thank you!

    • Not Larry
      March 17, 2014 at 11:10 pm

      The last sentence of your comment makes you the biggest moron in the history of the world

  • Disappointed UMass Fan
    March 17, 2014 at 7:52 pm

    Wow. What an absolute disgrace to UMass. As a former student and supporter of the basketball team, I’m sad to have read this disturbing and gramatically incorrect garbage that was posted. Do you know how embarrassing it is to see this and associate myself with UMass? So what that Bonaventure comes from a small place, so what that they beat us and stormed the court early?
    My most important question is: why are you bashing their basketball team as if they are the ones that have been saying these things about UMass? At the end of the day, your ignorance to associate a few individuals that you tricked into talking to you with an entire student body, fan section, and university, is an absolute disgrace.
    As a close friend to your athletic director John McCutcheon, I will be completely exposing this article and finding a way to find the person/people responsible for this article and have them punished to the fullest degree. For those who don’t know yet, it’s against the law in Massachusettes to “cyber-bully”. Using the names and making videos of those who are on this post is illegal and punishment can be carried out to the fullest extent.
    And my last comment- to whoever wrote this, please resign from your job- you really do suck. If you were a real man, you’d expose yourself and would not hide behind a computer screen. Get a life my friend.

    Oh yea, and one more thing. I absolutely love it in the poopshoot.

    With disgust,

    A very disappointed UMass fan

    • Turtleboy's Lawyer
      March 17, 2014 at 8:10 pm

      Turtleboy’s Lawyer will be in touch with you in regards to this post. You are cyber-bullying a blogger and I’m not sure if you were aware, but that is against the law in Massachusetts. Unless you expose yourself, you will face the maximum punishment the State hands out.

      Your choice.

      • Tim
        March 17, 2014 at 10:50 pm

        Turtleboy can’t afford a lawyer since he clearly doesn’t work and instead wastes his time bashing fans of a college that beat his team and he is upset that his ‘flawless’ school somehow is perfect. When he shows proof right here that he is an inconsiderate individual who wants to ‘get revenge’ via his blog post. He is being rude for stating comments he did. Additionally, he and his ‘team’ are clearly full of lies for not telling Bonaventure students who they are.

      • Joey G
        March 18, 2014 at 7:58 am

        Does the UMass Athletic Director have jurisdiction over blogs in the state of Massachusetts? Is that one of Deval Patrick’s final acts in office? “Whoever shall write an inflammatory blog about St. Bonaventure and/or its fans and subsidiaries including, but not limited to: Sister Margaret, “fucking winning” girl, excrement-colored jerseys, proximity to Buffalo, NY, and confusing “Bonas” with “Boners” shall bypass the jurisdiction of the Massachusetts State Police entirely and be punished by no fewer than three (3) stern talkings-to by UMass Athletic Director John McCutcheon.” These are the dangers of the PATRIOT ACT my friends.

    • Larry Doty
      March 17, 2014 at 8:16 pm

      Moron, watch the videos. “Fuck UMass” was the phrase of choice on Saturday.

    • Larry Doty
      March 17, 2014 at 8:17 pm

      You sounds like the biggest homo in the history of the world.

    • March 17, 2014 at 10:20 pm

      How do you know this blog was posted in Massachusetts?

  • Bonas Mom
    March 17, 2014 at 7:02 pm

    As a proud Bonas Mom, I take exception to the bashing of Bonas by Turtleboy. For one thing St Bonaventure is a second family for students, parents and faculty. As for the behavior of the students- they’re college kids for Pete’s sake. College kids who support their school win or lose.As for the derisive comments with respect to the quality of Bonas, most students have gone on to be quite successful. For example, the CFO of Corning Inc. is an alumnus of St Bonaventure. I think it’s a wonderful example of support that so many kids[including mine] made the trip to Brooklyn- not to mention all the money that they pumped into the local economy. Once a Bonnie always a Bonnie!

    • Joey G
      March 17, 2014 at 7:28 pm

      We pumped much more money into the local economy. Turtleboy’s wife had 22 beers by herself and then this guy Bill bought a bottle of Cook’s and a new hat.

    • Blong
      March 17, 2014 at 8:06 pm

      Yeah, I think that guy crushing the bud light pumped more into the Brooklyn economy over the weekend than anyone else combined. Except for the hipsters…. No one can defeat them.

  • SBU
    March 17, 2014 at 6:50 pm

    You comment on the language of the Bonaventure students, but you yourself use awful language in the blog and then claim it’s a “family” sports blog? Hypocrite much?

  • Tom
    March 17, 2014 at 6:29 pm

    Clearly someone doesn’t know anything about Bonas but proceeded to make comments like he knows Bonaventure. Lets state some facts. Bonas has 2200 students and is six hours away from NYC. St Joes is 8800 students and 2 hours away from NYC. Yet three times as many people from Bonas showed up for the game compared to St Joes piss excuse of a fan crowd.

    St Bonaventure is the closest community anywhere. If some Turtle Boy thinks he understands Bonas he can go jump off the Brooklyn bridge. Bonas is not just a college. It is home away from home. If the students are die hard committed to their sports then that just shows our pride. Leaving in a moment just to go support our team and having so many students and alumni show their support displays our commitment to our school.

    St Joes good win Saturday and Sunday. As disappointed as I am I will not make myself look like an ass for calling someone’s jerseys poop colored. Turtle Boy, I feel sorry for you that you will never understand the Bonaventure community. It is the closest community of students, teachers, and alumni. Sorry your school fails to offer more than just an education.

  • Slimer102
    March 17, 2014 at 6:12 pm

    Turtleboy, do you really spend your free time writing blogs trolling St. Bona fans? That’s just a sad and pathetic life you must live, bro.

  • Tom
    March 17, 2014 at 6:11 pm

    No one would have even read this shitty article (nor would they have read the last one) if it wasn’t for us bonnies coming on here to bash you. You should be thanking us.

  • Jackson Steve
    March 17, 2014 at 5:55 pm

    Why do people act like this is supposed to be legitimate journalism? It is a blog dedicated to the Hottest Takes in the Northeast. St. Bonaventure is in fact a shitty school. The uniforms are evidence of that. And this year the average GPA going into Umass was a 3.8. Better than St. Bonaventures 3.3. Point to Turtleboy.

    • Blong
      March 17, 2014 at 6:04 pm

      ZING!

    • Tom
      March 17, 2014 at 6:13 pm

      Doesn’t matter what you come in with. It matters what you come out with. Bonaventure students are more successful in college than UMASS students because it’s a better school.

      • Larry Doty
        March 17, 2014 at 6:52 pm

        That’s a really valid and well thought out point. I like your data.

      • Joey G
        March 17, 2014 at 7:35 pm

        Yeah, but you don’t have anywhere near as many mega-hotties as UMass does. Plus our girls show their boobies more often and don’t kick you in the gonards if you play a little grabass with them at a hockey game. Well, except for this one time that this one girl (I think her name was Madison, maybe Hannah, I don’t really remember) kicked me in the gonards when me and two other guys kept playing grabass with her while she was playing in an intramural field hockey game. We won the game but after the third time she kicked me in the gonards I had to walk off the field and get some ice and snort a line of ketamine. Then, on the way back to my dorm, I mooned a Canada goose that was looking at me funny. Unfortunately that goose turned out to be the Vice Chancellor of Human Resources, so I ended up running away from her, the goose, and the girl who kicked me in the gonards in a scene similar to that in the credits of the Benny Hill Show.

      • Blong
        March 17, 2014 at 8:04 pm

        Sure they are!

  • JD
    March 17, 2014 at 5:45 pm

    Hey hater, go watch the last five seconds of the St. louis vs. Bonas game… plus since when was it wrong to have school pride? Get a fucking life

    • Blong
      March 17, 2014 at 6:03 pm

      I watched it, it was fantastic! It helped St. Joes win the tournament. It didn’t help you get into any of the 4 tournaments, though. So….. well done?

      • Tombradyisking
        March 17, 2014 at 6:44 pm

        Bonas turned down a CBI bid actually. Richmond and Bonas, both teams in the a10 with winning records declined. Not making the CBI doesn’t mean anything. The cit is dedicated to kid majors only voiding A10 teams from qualifying.

        I’m not even bothered by all this because it’s obvious to see the sarcasm and intentional trolling. But the above is true. Teams have to pay to be in the CBI. Why pay to be in something whose outcome is meaningless? Umass was good this year, good for them. Bonnie’s fans stop wasting your time getting worked up over this nonsense.

    • Larry Doty
      March 17, 2014 at 6:51 pm

      Bonas turned down a CBI bid? Ummm, no. Bonas never received such a bid. Indiana turned it down.

      • Tombradyisking
        March 17, 2014 at 7:30 pm

        Bonas AD was in contact with the CBI selection comittee and said they couldn’t come to an agreement about entering the tournament. ViA basic deductive reasoning this clearly entails a bid turned down.

  • BonniesGoBonnies
    March 17, 2014 at 4:02 pm

    Buddy, we are not Turtleboy Trolls. You my friend are a St. Bonaventure troll, and truly one the biggest there are.

    • Blong
      March 17, 2014 at 5:01 pm

      Yes, I would say that Turtleboy is officially a St. Bonaventure troll after this blog. But it didn’t start that way!

      • Joey G
        March 17, 2014 at 5:10 pm

        Right you are, Broderick Longberg.

  • Somebody who isn't geographically stupid
    March 17, 2014 at 3:54 pm

    Turns out that the people in these videos are saying that you lied to get them to talk to you. You posed as an Atlantic 10 reporter for NYC. You exude journalistic integrity.

    • Blong
      March 17, 2014 at 5:00 pm

      Apparently you don’t know how to read:

      “Our reporter finally got to the Barclay’s Center an hour before the game, to meet some actual, real, live St. Bonaventure fans in their element. Obviously he couldn’t tell them he was a reporter for TurtleBoy Sports because if you’ve ever been to the zoo before, you know that you’re never supposed to feed the animals. Instead he masqueraded as an Atlantic 10 sports journalist and our cover was kept so that we could observe this beautiful creatures in their natural environment.”

      • Somebody who isn't geographically stupid
        March 17, 2014 at 5:02 pm

        Another lie told was that the “reporter” said the camera wasn’t rolling during some of the videos.
        Admitting that you lied to get a story doesn’t mean that integrity remains intact.

      • Blong
        March 17, 2014 at 5:14 pm

        I’m just pointing out that you struggle at reading, that’s all! No need to get your panties in a bunch, SWIGS!

    • Larry Doty
      March 17, 2014 at 6:50 pm

      Read the blog numb nuts. TurtleBoy wasn’t the cameraman. He doesn’t do field work. His cameraman told them he was an Atlantic 10 blogger. Last I checked he mentioned St. Joe’s, VCU, UMass, GW, and St. Bonnie’s in the blog. Last I checked those teams are all in the A-10. Oh yea, and he was reporting from the A-10 Tournament. But yea, he was “posing” as an A-10 reporter. I’m sure you’re obviously very sober friends recount every word the cameraman told them.

  • Olivia Love
    March 17, 2014 at 3:49 pm

    “I’m also 100% sure that everyone in this picture is a Buffalo Bills fans.”
    Your grammar is painful and you’re an insult to actual sports journalists everywhere.

    • Joey G
      March 17, 2014 at 5:08 pm

      Hey Olivia,

      Do you know that “fucking winning” girl? She’s kinda cute and she probably has a morally casual attitude and well, I haven’t been able to get a date since this weekend in Brooklyn with a St. Bonaventure girl who turned out to have 4 nipples. It was OK, but she kept asking me to pull her finger. If that is how girls in Buffalo get dates, that’s cool. It isn’t really my thing though. Anyway, sorry about that, that doesn’t really apply to our conversation now. So the “fucking winning” girl… as long as she wasn’t the girl who was taking a dump in the men’s room at 200 fifth and came out of the stall eating a turkey leg, I am totally into her. Does she ever yell that out in bed? Like, if you just tickle her until you find the sweet spot, does she scream out “FUCKING WINNINGGGGG” when I get it right? Does she have any orange underpants? I would be into that. Just ask her a few of these questions for me if you could. Thanks! And if it doesn’t work out, feel free to give me a call! Nice, sounds like we are getting somewhere today. First a 6 seed and now this!

      Marshall Klopper (my real name)

  • Umass Sucks
    March 17, 2014 at 3:42 pm

    Would rather lose as a Bonnie than be from your pitiful school any day

  • Tom
    March 17, 2014 at 3:35 pm

    Wait wait wait….you refer to Bonas fans as living a miserable existence, yet, you write a blog for UMass? You write a blog for a team whose student body of nearly 20k can barely fill up 25% of an arena? For a team who is making their first appearance in the NCAAs since their scandal ridden days of the 1990s? You do that and yet you have the audacity to refer to someone else’s existence as miserable?

    Just checking.

    • Joey G
      March 17, 2014 at 4:54 pm

      Yeah but there are soooooo many easy women at UMass.

  • Troll
    March 17, 2014 at 2:44 pm

    Good stuff hard hitting journalism here pal. Look it’s obvious that you are trolling the shit out of bonas students and alums, and by all means go for it it seems that you love all the attention and page views that we give you so I won’t knock the hustle. But just keep in mind that trolls don’t win Pulitzers but Bonaventure alums do , troll.

  • Jeff
    March 17, 2014 at 2:25 pm

    It seems like this guy really needs to find something to do with his life. He is a middle aged man that continuously attempts to bash college kids for having fun and supporting their school. I’m sure he would know what pride and joy were if he went to Bonaventure.

    • Joey G
      March 17, 2014 at 5:17 pm

      He isn’t middle aged. And is this junior smokeshow Hannah Gordon disguised as someone named Jeff? Clever, junior smokeshow Hannah Gordon. Hang on, I have to let the cat in. OK, back. So anyway, “Jeff,” why didn’t you come into Brooklyn on Saturday to meet and make out with Turtleboy??? It was the best party ever. Turtleboy had a line of girls from St. Bonaventure lined up and he was making out with them in exchange for either $5 or a photocopy of their boobs. You missed quite the party.

  • Turtle boy is a fuck boi
    March 17, 2014 at 2:10 pm

    Turtle boy don’t you have anything better to do with your life other than follow Bonnies fans around. Your a lame dude. So gay.

  • HV
    March 17, 2014 at 2:08 pm

    You’re a middle age man that sounds like a child… Come on I mean loserville? Really? You couldn’t be more creative for your poll?You are a very ignorant individual. If you had any balls you would’ve told the bonnies fans you were from turtle boy sports when interviewing them. What even is turtle boy sports? An irrelevant blog that has to bash one of the smallest D1 schools to get attention. Get a life. We have great fans and a great support system for our basketball program here. Once a bonnie always a bonnie.

  • March 17, 2014 at 1:53 pm

    GO BONNIES GO BONNIES GO.

  • Bill
    March 17, 2014 at 1:46 pm

    Hahahaha this is such a joke.

    I’m a Bonnie’s man from Boston. We in Mass consider UMass to be a huge joke. This man talks about them like they’re actuat a relevant school people in mass consider prestigious when it’s not the case at all. For anyone with half a brain cell it’s the safety public school- the one you apply to if you don’t want to leave home and know you’re too stupid to get in anywhere else. For ppl like this guy it’s the only place you can go and can afford to go because you’re probably a trashy loser from Worcester or Springfield.

    I got into UMass with a scholarship. I chose Bonnie’s. #everyoneknowszoomassisajoke

    • Chris Curtis
      March 17, 2014 at 2:18 pm

      So you turned down a scholarship to a state school in order to pay full tuition at a private college? You sure showed me whose boss!!!

      • Bill
        March 17, 2014 at 2:46 pm

        #1 – please point out where I said I didn’t also get a scholarship to Sbu

        #2 employers in Boston don’t take a UMass degree seriously- anyone with the right amount of chromosomes can graduate from the zoomass

        #3 who’s boss. As in who is. Not whose as in possessive. Keep on making my argument for me with your Zoo mass publicly funded education.

      • Blong
        March 17, 2014 at 4:57 pm

        2, – Not true at all. Sicne you aren’t actually an employer, I’m not shocked that you are wrong about that.

    • Joey G
      March 17, 2014 at 4:57 pm

      Bill just misspelled “BC” as “UMass.” Completely accurate once you correct his spelling.

      • Uconn
        March 17, 2014 at 6:33 pm

        Haha is someone seriously trying to say BC is a shit school and UMass is superior? I know BC students laugh at schools far superior to UMass. umass is so irrelevant to intelligent new englanders that it’s not even on BCs radar to make fun of. The joke that UMass is speaks for itself . Love internet trolls that have their 2 loser friends stick up for them with terribly thought out middle school grade insults. I know a lot of Bonnie’s and so I stumbled onto this. Bonnie’s are a solid bunch.

        By the way UConn laughs at Umass and every other a10 school. You’re all a joke in our eyes.

      • Joey G
        March 17, 2014 at 7:39 pm

        Expensive does not equal the amazing school that BC claims to be. And I believe all of the Bonnies would frown upon your poor grammar and punctuation usage. And who is the higher seed this year, UConn (if you want to, ya know, show off your UConn education with a little capitalization and figuring out how to count to 7).

      • UConn
        March 17, 2014 at 7:51 pm

        I agree expensive isnt everything being that I too went to a public university. But the fact remains, and notice I said fact, that both BC and UConn are superior schools to UMass.

        You’re 1 seed higher this year, that’s nice. Wasn’t aware that one year over the course of 60 is the omnipotent measure for superiority in bball success. This is typed on a blog from iPhone by the way, capitalization isn’t all that crucial in getting the point across.

        Call me when UMass has multiple final fours (not stripped from them), conference titles, conference tourney titles, national championships and NBA all stars. Not to mention undeniably higher educational accolades. Until then continue to stick up for your buddy who is headed down the road to nowhere of trolling people behind a computer screen.

      • Joey G
        March 17, 2014 at 7:59 pm

        I will give you basketball superiority, certainly not academic.

        I will, however, absolutely put you guys on a much higher pedestal than the $60,000 per year community college in Newton with a good law school.

      • Blong
        March 17, 2014 at 8:00 pm

        Let me know when UCONN Basketball players stop stealing laptops and have a collective GPA higher than 1.0 and don’t cause their school to be banned from the NCAA Tournament.

        And speaking of being vacated, how many wins did you get in the 1996 NCAA Tournament? Oh, that’s right, none. Vacated as well.

      • UConn
        March 17, 2014 at 8:12 pm

        What’s the world you live in like? A world where UConn and BC are inferior academically to UMass? It must be great there in fantasy land, because in no real world is that true. Sorry you guys spent too much time being waste cases in high school and are now bitter when other schools flaunt their undeniable superiority to yours. I know if must sting.

      • Blong
        March 18, 2014 at 8:23 am

        If you want to continue thinking that UCONN is a better school than UMASS, feel free. I wish you luck in life, because clearly you need it.

      • Joey G
        March 18, 2014 at 8:41 am

        You must have a wonderful idea of what fantasy land is like. A world where BC people have any right to laugh at anyone. With all of their Nobel Laureates and all. Oh, wait. What’s that? They have zero? They were a safety school and a laughing stock until Flutie threw a pass and they jacked up their prices 30 years ago? If you went to UConn, you no doubt heard from knuckleheads who paid too much money to go to Wesleyan for a wonderful $200,000 liberal arts education talking about their superiority. I hope you put little faith in their statements as well.

      • Blong
        March 18, 2014 at 9:15 pm
  • Chin
    March 17, 2014 at 1:42 pm

    I’m glad you had the time to make so many assumptions about our school and our students. Half of the students you mocked for being “Buffalonians” were from Ohio, and had you cared to ask intellectual questions perhaps you would have received equivalent answers. Your questions were intended to arouse that type of behavior. We are a passionate school of students and athletes who will go above and beyond for one another. Each of the students you interviewed has a whole school who will defend them, let’s see how many people defend you…

  • March 17, 2014 at 1:39 pm

    I don’t know what is in the water at St Bona. I’m from Rochester, NY and my roommate went to Bona. He’s so proud of his shitty school that it’s sickening. I say nothing bad about other fans and teams, I only root for my team instead of putting down others (and I’m a Bills fan), but Bona fans are quick to say fuck you to a fan from another team. Dude, just go back to your community college…that’s what St Bonnaventure is right? Im only guessing it by the way you all act.

    • March 17, 2014 at 2:02 pm

      Nice. So, in your words, you say nothing bad about other fans and other team? You don’t see anything hypocritical about this comment? You blew your credibility in the second sentence. I would insult you by saying, ” you dumb sack of shit,” but you already did it for me.

  • Daryle
    March 17, 2014 at 1:29 pm

    Lolololol I love how this is written as if uMass has any fans. their arena is empty and their a public state school. Words like “perpetually suck” are thrown around yet Bonas has more tournament appearances this century and as many final four appearances as UMass. Bonas perpetually beats uMass too. Including this year and on the way to the dance

    I go to St Joes and we consider Umass to be way bigger a joke- at least Bonas is small with a reason to struggle based on location and a massive scandal 10 years ago. uMass just plain sucks year in and year out.

    Way to hold a grudge for 2 months. You look like a pathetic desperate fool, overflowing with irony and hyperbole.

    • Chris Curtis
      March 17, 2014 at 2:16 pm

      Remember when st joes went undefeated and then didnt make the final four?

      • Daryle
        March 17, 2014 at 2:57 pm

        Lol yeah remember how Joes has more sweet 16 appearances than umass has tournament appearances? For a public school with a population as big as mass, AND a football school, they’re bball resume is the biggest laughing stock I’ve ever seen. No wonder why you’re the little bitch of UConn and BC up there.

        Great argument about the final four….all that suggests is that Joes was undefeated due to weak competition. In turn suggesting even further how big a punch line your joke public school is. Sweet vacated final four while were on the subject.

      • Blong
        March 17, 2014 at 4:55 pm

        Actually, St. Joes has 7 Sweet Sixteens, UMASS has 9 NCAA appearances. Not sure when 7 became more than 9… did you learn that at St. Joes?

        UMASS has never been a consistently good basketball school, no doubt about it. But our two best players ever are better than any player your school has had.

        But hey, you’re the one helping this blog get more hits and attention with every post you make. Turtleboy 1, Daryle 0.

    • Joey G
      March 17, 2014 at 4:59 pm

      Hyperbole in a blog?? NOOOOO!!!!

      • Daryle
        March 17, 2014 at 6:23 pm

        Hmm yeah I suppose Jameer Nelson and Delonte west suck, right? Not to mention Galloway is better than anyone on umass.

        The sweet 16 reference was an obvious exaggeration but the point is that comparing our sweet 16 appearances to your general tourney appearances highlights how pathetic a program is. The whole point is, he writes this with an arrogance like Umass means something in the world or college sports when the real fact is any college bball fan knows umass is a joke of a program. So he has no leg to stand on.

        I couldn’t care less how many hits his site gets. If he wants to get attention for being an ignorant misinformed moron with a grossly overinflated idea of himself and his school, then let him have it. If attention for being an idiot is what he craves, I’m embarrassed on his behalf that his existence revolves around something so minuscule and pathetic.

      • Joey G
        March 17, 2014 at 7:25 pm

        I would never dis Delonte West. The game “Pimp or Delonte West” (played with sound bytes) is the greatest game ever invented (after Hungry Hungry Hippos). Plus he made sweet love to LeBron’s mom, possibly.

      • Blong
        March 17, 2014 at 7:56 pm

        Wait, Galloway is better than Dr. J and Marcus Camby? Galloway isn’t even better than Chaz Williams. What crack are you smoking? Oh, let me guess, you didn’t mean to say that Galloway isn’t better than Dr. J and Marcus Camby… you were just throwing that out there in an attempt to sound smart about your current team.

        And Mr. Nelson and Mr. West were both fine players, but neither could hold the jock strap of Dr. J and Marcus Camby. I think you know that already, though… you don’t seem quite THAT dumb…

        Obvious exaggeration, or terrible education? I’ll go with the latter. UMASS has more credibility in the basketball and college sports world in general than St. Joes will ever have. You are nothing but Temple’s little bitch and you love it.

      • Daryle
        March 17, 2014 at 8:07 pm

        Haha take away the 90s in which UMass was floating in a ceas pool of curruption and you make the dance once a decade. Having 2 good players all time might be cool up there in you’re little sad world. Down at St joes we prefer to consider 6 years without a dance to be an eternity. I’ll take that over a good team once a decade any day.

        Galloway was mentioned in comparison with this years team. Of course he isn’t better than dr j and Camby. I suppose I should have assumed you cling to people who played before you were a jizz stain in your mothers box when trying to argue relevance for your pathetic basketball program.

      • Blong
        March 18, 2014 at 8:39 am

        First of all, what is a “ceas pool of curruption”? I assume you were not bright enough to say “cesspool of corruption”, but you’ll probably blame it on autocorrect. But anyways, please describe this “ceas pool of curruption”. If by “ceas pool or curruption” you mean one player accepting gifts from an agent, you might want to check your definitions of “ceas pool” and “curruption”.

        Now since I brought up Dr. J and Camby, you went right to Galloway and didn’t say a word about him vs this years team. Hence why some might assume you are challenged in some form or fashion. You also still haven’t responded to the fact that Galloway is a nobody compared to Chaz Williams… and just in case you need some clarity, Chaz Williams is part of this years team.

        And I appreciate you thinking that I am younger than 20 years old. You put a nice smile on my face 🙂

      • Daryle
        March 18, 2014 at 12:06 pm

        You can tell you’re in someone’s head and they’re reaaaaally reaching for an argument when they have to bring up spelling that is a blatant mistake made by the fact I typed it on a Samsung and it’s on a blog. Of course it was cesspool. But hey, if you want to try to get me for not proofreading a comment off a blog post, well then, you got me! Good for you…I guess?

        By cesspool, I mean- John Calipari was their coach. Everywhere he goes trouble follows. The guy is a greasy, slimy dirtball. If you think that the one player accepting gifts is the only shady thing that happened, then you’re either the most ignorant person in New England, or you’re in denial.

        With regards to Galloway- clearly intiution is not a strong suit of yours, nor is utilizing your reading comprehension skills to recognize inferred conclusions from written communications. My point was that initially, I misunderstood you in that I thought you were saying UMass’s 2 best players on this year’s team were better than anyone St Joes has ever had- now we both know that is laughable. My next point was- I assumed you were referring to this years team, because I didn’t think you woulld be so deperate and pathetic to defend your bball program that you’d have to reach back to players from the 1970’s in order to show how good it is. Like I said, having 2 players with successful NBA careers and 1,000 others that no one outside of UMAss remembers within 2 years of their departure- that’s nothing to brag about.

        Now as for Galloway vs Williams- Williams is a fine player, but one could absolutely argue Galloway is better. Galloway averages significantly more rebounds and points per game (yes i know it’s only 2, but over a 30 + game season, 2+ppg more IS considerable- at least to people with a shred of knowledge about the game). Williams on the other hand has considerable more APG. But then again, they dont even play the same position on the court- so comparing them is futile, and in general, it’s 100% arbitrafry. So while I cannot say Galloway is, for a fact, the better player, nor can you about Williams. You’re the one who said that.

        Finally- sorry, I only assumed you were 20 years old or younger. I guess I figured only a teenager would spend his time arguing with strangers on the internet. I’m only a teenager- but if I’m still doing this in my 20’s, Ill call you up and get advice on why I shouldnt kill myself, because I’ll have the realization that I’m a loser if I’m still doing this in my 20’s.

        Have fun losing to NC St or Tennesse!

        Daryle

      • Daryle
        March 18, 2014 at 12:20 pm

        Sorry, Iowa or Tennesse- before you try to use yet again another miniscule and meaningless detail when compared to the overall point of my argrument in order to make yours.

      • Blong
        March 18, 2014 at 9:18 pm

        Actually, you brought up Galloway: “Hmm yeah I suppose Jameer Nelson and Delonte west suck, right? Not to mention Galloway is better than anyone on umass”

        But hey, how dare I bring up something stupid you said?

      • Daryle
        March 18, 2014 at 10:00 pm

        Way to once again address a minuscule detail while failing to counter any of the legitimate points I made rooted in fact. You’re defense of yourself and school in this discourse has been pitiful. I hope you don’t plan on a future in law or anything else that requires making points backed by factual validity.

        Have fun being an internet troll well into your 20s!

        Love, your master,

        Daryle

      • Blong
        March 19, 2014 at 1:56 pm

        So wait, you bash me for saying that Chaz is better than Galloway when YOU brought up that Galloway is better than anyone on UMASS, and somehow I’m losing this argument? YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

        You can’t even follow a conversation properly. I’m done with you and your pathetic education.

      • Daryle
        March 19, 2014 at 5:04 pm

        You are so beyond stupid and inept at comprehension of what I’m trying to say it’s downright hilarious. You’ve totall missed the point of 99% of what I said and failed to make an argument, instead choosing to dwell on semantics and the order of conversation.

        Galloway is better than anyone on UMass and if you don’t believe me maybe you should take a second to hear some analysis on the subject from , I don’t know, anyone who isn’t turtleboy or blinded by umass bias. I tried givingn you the benefit of the doubt by saying g it was arbitrary since you also said he wasn’t better than cya Williams but you’re inability to piece together inferences and implications of written conversation is hilariously poor.

        But go ahead and continue to think that glorified safety school who accepts nearly 80% of applicants and still only enrolls 30% of it’s accepted applicants is with mentioning. Whatever helps you sleep at night and forget about the fact you’re shitty public education is allowing you to be outsmarted by a kid who hasn’t even officially enrolled in college yet. Ya must be proud of yourself. Then again ignorance is bliss.

  • Giovanni di Fidanza
    March 17, 2014 at 1:04 pm

    Cool dudes drinking Bud Light. Nice shirt on the guy with the horseshoe, where’d he get it, 1995? Should be the UMass brochure cover.

    • Joey G
      March 17, 2014 at 1:31 pm

      1999 Actually… with a name like that you must be a clothing designer.

      • Giovanni di Fidanza
        March 17, 2014 at 2:01 pm

        Close. Franciscan theologian.

      • Blong
        March 17, 2014 at 2:17 pm

        Oh cool… did he go to St. Bonaventure too????

      • Giovanni di Fidanza
        March 17, 2014 at 2:37 pm

        Something like that.

      • Blong
        March 17, 2014 at 4:47 pm

        Awesome! What was his GPA? Is he one of those guys that ended up being a US Senator???

      • Joey G
        March 17, 2014 at 5:24 pm

        In all seriousness, are you really a Franciscan theologian?

      • Not Larry
        March 17, 2014 at 10:51 pm

        Who clearly moonlights as a sommelier

  • AR
    March 17, 2014 at 1:01 pm

    Nothing like a middle-aged manchild bashing another team because he’s sad his team lost. I haven’t seen behavior like this since the third grade. Get a life, dude. Oh, and while you’re at it, might I suggest you enroll in the Russel J. Jandoli school of journalism? Your writing sucks.

    • Blong
      March 17, 2014 at 5:18 pm

      Do they hand out Welding Certificates at the Russel J. Jandoli School of Journalism? I hear that’s a big hit up on Olean!

  • Zar
    March 17, 2014 at 12:30 pm

    Yea, Bonaventure fans are drunk and noisy But what average college fan base isn’t? You absolutely find the same behavior anywhere else. It just happens to be that bonaventure showed up to support their team. If 1,000 Umass fans came to Brooklyn, do you seriously believe that they be well behaved? Any sporting event in the world will have drunks, assholes, and fans that do not know anything about the sport they are watching. You’re only picking on Bonaventure because we have a fan base willing to drive to Brooklyn to support our team.

  • king
    March 17, 2014 at 12:13 pm

    …who has time to write this much? Get a life we at least we have pride in our school

  • Somebody who isn't geographically stupid
    March 17, 2014 at 12:02 pm

    Oh my goodness is this a journalistic pile of shit. Wander off of Deadspin for a few minutes and learn how to write.
    You can’t blindly insult and generalize a group of people and then whine like a child when they say something bad. Don’t act like your “blog” or whatever this garbage is stands anywhere above anything that was said. Also, don’t act like your students are any different.

    You don’t understand how Bonaventure has such a following? Any chance it has something to do with having an extremely proud and passionate group of students who don’t hide behind a camera? We support our school and our program. I’m sorry you have trouble comprehending such a simple fact.

    The constant insults about the location of our school are laughable. Nobody actually believes you don’t know where it is, and who actually cares where it is? Does it change the fact that a school less than one-tenth the size of your’s has twice as many NCAA Tournament appearances since the turn of the millennium.

    How many active NBA players? Zero? Oh, I’m sorry. We even have one of those.

    Pitiful.

    • NBA Expert
      March 17, 2014 at 12:19 pm

      Marcus Camby.

      • Somebody who isn't geographically stupid
        March 17, 2014 at 12:35 pm

        What team is he employed by? I forget…

      • Blong
        March 17, 2014 at 6:00 pm

        Yeah, I’m not really sure that did your argument any good SWIGS… a 17 year NBA career is nothing to bash someone for.

    • Joey G
      March 17, 2014 at 1:35 pm

      What does this have to do with geography?

  • Mike
    March 16, 2014 at 9:35 pm

    Notice how they immediately become docile when Sister Margaret rolls through. Priceless.
    If that’s not school spirit, what is?

  • President
    March 16, 2014 at 5:33 pm

    Wow, at least their president didn’t send the Amherst PD to spray kids standing around

    • Chris Curtis
      March 16, 2014 at 5:36 pm

      Touche.

    • Joey G
      March 16, 2014 at 5:41 pm

      Look at Sister Margaret… do you think she’s above that? She would pepper spray you and everyone you love if she had the chance.

      (Sister Margaret, if you read this, please forgive me. That was hyperbole)

      • Blong
        March 17, 2014 at 11:56 am

        What’s the massive bump on your head?? bahahaha

    • Joey G
      March 17, 2014 at 5:18 pm

      This can’t be the real president. I think Sister Margaret’s prose is better than this.

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