Hoodrat Heroes

Two Vagrants Banging Behind A Hyannis Dumpster In Broad Daylight Is Par For The Course In Hyannis

I wish I’d say I was surprised by the fact that two vagrants were banging in broad daylight on Main Street in Hyannis, but I’m not. 

Want to have your business advert seen by over 1.2 million people per month? Email us at [email protected] for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.

Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook

Click on the image to check out the Turtleboy Store - your one stop shop for all your Turtleboy shopping needs.

Click on the image to check out the Turtleboy Store – your one stop shop for all your Turtleboy shopping needs.

 

 

Screen Shot 2015-09-25 at 5.39.14 PM

Hyannis NewsA horrified employee ran inside her workplace shocked at what she had just witnessed. 

Sources reached out to HN today, completely appalled at being subjected to an open and lewd sex act in broad daylight behind a dumpster near the Horgan Insurance Agency parking lot located at 44 Barnstable Road. One source said they have come to expect seeing individuals shooting up and defecating in that area, but today’s blatant and alarming display took things to a whole new low for that section of downtown Hyannis.

Police were immediately called as this photograph was taken. (The photo is obviously heavily edited due to the obscene and explicit subject matter… the woman was nearly completely disrobed at the time.) The time was approximately 2:15PM.

Cruisers came flying and arrived swiftly, there was a total of about six, sources say. According to sources, the male was arrested on a warrant and new charges related to today’s offense. The girl, reportedly a known prostitute, was also arrested. (HN NOTE: Certain parts of the downtown area now have a number of “common night-walkers” and prostitutes, quite often seeking money to support their drug habit.)

Today’s scene took place just footsteps away from “A Baby Center,” located just across the old cemetery located to the rear of the Federated Church. According to A Baby Center’s web page, their mission “is to aid children in need who live on Cape Cod and the Islands by supplementing critical basic needs to ensure good health and safety.” It remains uncertain whether any young parents or children also witnessed today’s sex crime.

Screen Shot 2015-09-25 at 5.57.09 PM

There is absolutely nothing surprising about this story whatsoever. You think those two are paying the out of season discounted motel rate for a room? LOL. I don’t think so. Rooms cost money. Dumpster are free.

I know people are gonna say, “but it’s Cape Cod.” Wrong. Hyannis and the entire town of Barnstable don’t count as part of Cape Cod. Vacationing in Hyannis completely defeats the purpose of going to the Cape. There’s INSANE amounts of traffic. The beaches don’t have waves. There’s no sharks. And all the Kennedy’s you care about are dead now.

Barnstable is basically Leominster transplanted 100 miles to the southeast. Because junkies have zero problem crossing the Bourne Bridge and hoofing it down Route 6. Go down to Kennedy Beach in Hyannis on a Friday afternoon and look what you find. It’s like Lake Wallum in Douglas – everyone’s wearing a wife beater, holding a pit bull, blasting awful music, and grilling on those stationary charcoal grills that the park provides.

We were meaning to rank the Cape Cod towns 1-15 this summer but we never got around to it. But i’ll give you a sneak preview – Barnstable is dead last. No questions asked. Because there’s no other town in the cape where people plow each other behind a dumpster on Main Street in broad daylight. Here’s my Cape rankings as of right now:

1. Wellfleet, 2. Eastham, 3. Chatham, 4. Orleans, 5. Brewster, 6. Dennis, 7. Harwich, 8. Truro, 9. Sandwich, 10. Bourne (debatable that this is even a Cape town), 11. Provincetown (Nothing against gay people, it’s just so far away and crowded), 12. Falmouth, 13. Mashpee, 14. Yarmouth, 15. Barnstable.

Long story short, if you’re going to the Cape, the further out you go the better. Vagrants like to settle close to the bridges.

Want to have your business advert seen by over 1.2 million people per month? Email us at [email protected] for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.

Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook

Click on the image to check out the Turtleboy Store - your one stop shop for all your Turtleboy shopping needs.

Click on the image to check out the Turtleboy Store – your one stop shop for all your Turtleboy shopping needs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

20 Comment(s)
  • mousy
    September 28, 2015 at 12:20 pm

    That’s hot.

  • No fur coat, all trousers
    September 26, 2015 at 6:08 pm

    Having had sex in public on The Cape I can’t say that I blame these people. Let them have their fun

  • Disgusted
    September 26, 2015 at 8:56 am

    Let’s pray she doesn’t end up pregnant. It would be another DCF trainwreck.

  • Ellen
    September 25, 2015 at 7:20 pm

    Love this website but I’m pretty bummed about the pitbull mention. I see what you’re trying to portray but it doesn’t help the dogs unjust negative image.

    • 01564
      September 25, 2015 at 8:40 pm

      As Howie Carr says, “Not all pitbull owners are drug dealers…but all drug dealers are pitbull owners.”

    • BobnMic
      September 26, 2015 at 3:45 pm

      Pit Bulls are a vile and disgusting man made creature created purely for killing. Personally, I was attacked by Pit Bulls on three different occasions in downtown Worcester when Pit Bulls were running around like crazy with their gang banger so called handlers. I have the scares to prove it. That’s when I stopped shopping in downtown Worcester. Stupid me that should have happened after the first attack. My faith in downtown was liberal at the time. No more.

      You don’t see them around as much any more thank GOD!

      • Kevins 9 Iron
        Frank Lee
        September 28, 2015 at 10:24 am

        reason number 268 to stay away from downtown…

  • Garrett
    September 25, 2015 at 6:51 pm

    They must have orgys in Worcester then because that is def the shit hole of mass

    • Lincoln Street Turtle Rider
      September 29, 2015 at 8:00 pm

      Check the Bus Shelters behind the Worcester Common. I’ve seen people shooting up in there, so it wouldn’t surprise me if worcester’s finest crackheads were also “riding the turtle” if you catch my drift.

  • J Springer
    September 25, 2015 at 6:30 pm

    And here is Melinda Boone proof that this is a porn site. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwe

  • RJ
    September 25, 2015 at 6:19 pm

    Look, I paid that chick half a sandwich and I don’t care if it was next to a cemetery, I’m collecting on that debt.

  • Devils Mouthpiece
    September 25, 2015 at 6:12 pm

    Did they get the money shot on film?

  • Bobby Wheeler
    September 25, 2015 at 5:11 pm

    Where I can find the raw, uncensored photo? Morbid curiosity makes me want to see it.

    • Uninquiring mind
      September 25, 2015 at 5:45 pm

      your gross

      • mack4966
        September 25, 2015 at 6:48 pm

        Your gross what? Oh…perhaps you meant your”re gross. No offense.

        • uninquiring mind
          September 25, 2015 at 9:50 pm

          bwahahahahahaha no i meant you’re i guess, but, if your gonna be so critical on someones spelling you might wanna double check that you did it RIGHT YOUR self

          • Nope, no thanks
            September 25, 2015 at 10:32 pm

            I think you mean, “…if you’re gonna be…”

    • mack4966
      September 25, 2015 at 6:50 pm

      Satureay night….ten pm….same dumpster….we’ll make a new one for you. Bring iPhone..

      • uninquiring mind
        September 25, 2015 at 9:51 pm

        perhaps you meant Saturday

Comment on this Post

RELATED POSTS
All-Star Worcester Parents Lay Siege To School Bus, Beat Up Bus Driver, Then Write Magnificent Things On Facebook
Comments From The Worcester Parent Bus Riot Blog Were Borderline Orgasmic
Hot Girl Threatening To Sue Turtleboy Sports Over Busgate, City Council Still Hasn’t Even Mentioned It