Westboro Biting, Pen Stabbing, Pool Enforcer Psycho School Committee Mom Just Got A Headstone In The TBS Graveyard By Resigning In Disgrace

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Time to add another headstone to the Turtleboy Sports graveyard for Ilyse Levine-Kanji:

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We wrote about this lady the other day. We thought her story was strange because she drove all the way from Westboro to Pittsfield for her 18 year old son to take the driving test. Turns out her son is autistic, and the reason he was in Pittsfield is likely because she’s tried every other RMV in the state and been turned down. This was her final try and when it failed she just couldn’t resist the urge to bite the driving instructor and tried to stab him with a pen. Happens to the best of us.

But from what everyone tells us, the son is a really nice person. And honestly, we feel for mothers out there in her situation. It’s not easy, and it’s not fair. But it doesn’t change the fact that not everyone can get behind the wheel of a car, and you can’t bite people when you don’t get your way. Rules are rules for a reason.

Of course after we Googled her we found out all sorts of fun stuff. Like the time she was arrested after she beat the shit out of another woman at the public town pool because she wasn’t following “pool protocol” for her kid’s birthday party. Then we found out she was actually the chairman of the Westboro School Committee. If you’ve been to Westboro, you’d understand how shocking this is. If it was the Colrain School Committee no one would bat an eye. But Westboro is a really nice town, and we assumed they didn’t elect nutjobs to run school policy in their town. Guess we were wrong.

Anyway, this woman has “overbearing, uppity, hyphenated last name, suburban Mom” written all over her.

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And she showed us that in her resignation letter:

“I have truly enjoyed volunteering for the past eight years on Westboro School Committee,” Levine-Kanji wrote. “Since I was not planning to seek a fourth term this March, I have decided to resign now so that someone else can have the opportunity of joining the School Committee at the beginning of the school year. Additionally, while I dispute recent news stories, I do not want this misinformation to distract from all the important work that goes into opening a new school year. Good luck to everyone for the 2016-17 school year!”

HAHAHHAHA. “Since I was not planning on seeking a fourth term this March.” Love it. Such a classic thing to say when you know your name is so damaged that you can’t possibly sniff a victory. Turtleboy was gonna go fill in for Tom Brady during his four game suspension, but since I’m gonna retire at the end of the year anyway I decided to let Jimmy G give quarterbacking a shot. Only a completely self righteous dooshnozzle would word her resignation letter like this.

The best part is the fact that she says she is “disputing” the “recent news stories” that she bit a driving instructor. Because I’m sure it was all just a big misunderstanding. Those teeth marks in his arm were planted!! Same with the pen stabbing. Same with the pool protocol beat down. None of it was her fault. Doesn’t really matter though. She’s gone because we blew up her spot and she had no choice. This is what we do at Turtleboy Sports. We make the world a safer place for children and driving instructors. Time to get that headstone ready for the FIFTH School Committee member we’ve dug a plot for!!

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18 Comment(s)
  • AJ
    August 23, 2016 at 3:08 pm

    LOB- right you are….she’s not going anywhere. She already planted the seed in her resignation statement about “misinformation” that’s out there. Needless to say she’ll spin herself into a victim.

    Those towns can be funny though, I’m sure there’s a petition already to ban this nut job from the private pool.

  • LOB
    August 23, 2016 at 1:36 pm

    I’m afraid we have not seen or heard the last of her!

  • Ralphieboy
    August 23, 2016 at 10:47 am

    Trust me.Westboro does’nt have a public pool. She was at a members only neighborhood pool that costs an arm and a leg to join.

    • Chas
      August 23, 2016 at 12:31 pm

      Absolutely right Ralph, this is a very limited access HOA type of pool, google map her address (Rocklawn Rd) and you’ll see it nestled in the woods next to the tennis court (of course). No riff-raff allowed, take yourself to lovely Lake Chauncy!

  • Lightfoot
    August 23, 2016 at 10:33 am

    WestboroUGH has a public pool?

  • Ed Augustus
    August 23, 2016 at 10:32 am

    I am pleased to announce the appointment of Ms. Iylese Levine-Kanji as Worcester’s Chief Autism Outreach Director. Please feel free to submit resumes for Assistant Autism Outreach Officer in charge of Diversity and Assistant Outreach Officer in Charge of Multi-lingual Interpretation. Ms. Levine-Kanji brings a unique skill set to this newly-created position and can’t wait to sink her teeth into the job. Out of an abundance of caution, I will be confiscating all pens at city hall and issuing crayons. The City’s Head Chief Diversity Officer will ensure that all crayon colors are appropriately represented.

    • Lynch for DPW
      August 23, 2016 at 12:55 pm

      And, while you’re at it… Maybe you could appoint Kevin Lynch as head of the DPW… Like Paul Moosey, he doesn’t live in town… and, he’s just as good at snow removal!

  • ProfessorM
    August 23, 2016 at 10:07 am

    I have to admit if she had a sexy rose tat on her neck and was a little older she could pass as my twin sister.

    • FiestyLawyerLady
      August 23, 2016 at 4:41 pm

      I have to admit that this is actually me. This was all just practice so when I do eventually meet up with Bob I can bite him so hard he will scream like the bitch he is. LMAO.

      • Rhino
        August 23, 2016 at 5:38 pm

        No one thinks you’re funny

        • FiestyLawyerLady
          August 23, 2016 at 5:58 pm

          I don’t care what you think Rhino. It’s not my fault. Bob started this whole thing and it is not my fault. He won’t leave me alone. He always comes after me. He stalks me to no end. IT IS NOT MY FAULT.

  • Not-so-grim Reaper
    August 23, 2016 at 9:51 am

    Oh, don’t you worry… This won’t be the last we see of her. It just frees up more time to dote on those kids, devote time to anti-gun issues, write politically correct autism awareness blogs, assault women at pools, and bite people on behalf of her son.

  • KimberlyS
    August 23, 2016 at 9:16 am

    Without the school committee to keep her occupied, she may just go fully batshit crazy and start biting everyone she sees! It’s in her eyes!

  • Independent Thinker
    August 23, 2016 at 7:31 am

    The problem with pubic pools, even hotel pools, is the fact that trashy people piss in them. And if someone isn’t toilet trained, you cannot ban them. All you can do is to request that they wear rubber pants. This even applies to pools within a private group, such as a condominium association. Thanks to the PC police, it’s discriminatory to ban them from the pool.

  • Say no to pools
    August 23, 2016 at 6:28 am

    The irony is she probably fought to get public funding for the pool and didn’t realize welfare people will use it as a bathtub. The concept of public pools is great until the welfare pigs show up with their 8 kids and a bar of soap from the dollar store.

    • Wabbitt
      August 25, 2016 at 12:41 pm

      It’s Westboro, and the woman she beat up was one of her neighbors. Do you really think this snooty bitch lives in the same part of town as the Section 8 housing?

  • Fire
    August 23, 2016 at 5:58 am

    Who is the large breasted woman on one of the gravestones? Asking for a friend.

  • PG
    August 23, 2016 at 2:57 am


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