Time to add another headstone to the Turtleboy Sports graveyard for Ilyse Levine-Kanji:
We wrote about this lady the other day. We thought her story was strange because she drove all the way from Westboro to Pittsfield for her 18 year old son to take the driving test. Turns out her son is autistic, and the reason he was in Pittsfield is likely because she’s tried every other RMV in the state and been turned down. This was her final try and when it failed she just couldn’t resist the urge to bite the driving instructor and tried to stab him with a pen. Happens to the best of us.
But from what everyone tells us, the son is a really nice person. And honestly, we feel for mothers out there in her situation. It’s not easy, and it’s not fair. But it doesn’t change the fact that not everyone can get behind the wheel of a car, and you can’t bite people when you don’t get your way. Rules are rules for a reason.
Of course after we Googled her we found out all sorts of fun stuff. Like the time she was arrested after she beat the shit out of another woman at the public town pool because she wasn’t following “pool protocol” for her kid’s birthday party. Then we found out she was actually the chairman of the Westboro School Committee. If you’ve been to Westboro, you’d understand how shocking this is. If it was the Colrain School Committee no one would bat an eye. But Westboro is a really nice town, and we assumed they didn’t elect nutjobs to run school policy in their town. Guess we were wrong.
Anyway, this woman has “overbearing, uppity, hyphenated last name, suburban Mom” written all over her.
And she showed us that in her resignation letter:
“I have truly enjoyed volunteering for the past eight years on Westboro School Committee,” Levine-Kanji wrote. “Since I was not planning to seek a fourth term this March, I have decided to resign now so that someone else can have the opportunity of joining the School Committee at the beginning of the school year. Additionally, while I dispute recent news stories, I do not want this misinformation to distract from all the important work that goes into opening a new school year. Good luck to everyone for the 2016-17 school year!”
HAHAHHAHA. “Since I was not planning on seeking a fourth term this March.” Love it. Such a classic thing to say when you know your name is so damaged that you can’t possibly sniff a victory. Turtleboy was gonna go fill in for Tom Brady during his four game suspension, but since I’m gonna retire at the end of the year anyway I decided to let Jimmy G give quarterbacking a shot. Only a completely self righteous dooshnozzle would word her resignation letter like this.
The best part is the fact that she says she is “disputing” the “recent news stories” that she bit a driving instructor. Because I’m sure it was all just a big misunderstanding. Those teeth marks in his arm were planted!! Same with the pen stabbing. Same with the pool protocol beat down. None of it was her fault. Doesn’t really matter though. She’s gone because we blew up her spot and she had no choice. This is what we do at Turtleboy Sports. We make the world a safer place for children and driving instructors. Time to get that headstone ready for the FIFTH School Committee member we’ve dug a plot for!!
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