Zach The Alleged Bike Thief Forced To Roll In The Mud By A Junkie Hardo Is Coming On The YouTube Live Show To Clear His Name After The Bruins Game


South Shore Turtlegirl published what has turned out to be one of the most unpopular blogs in the history of Turtleboy earlier this week. This one, about a vigilante vajstain who received the praise of many after forcing an alleged bike thief to roll in the mud, and then assaulted him by hitting him in the face with handful of mud while he was driving away. The video has been pulled down from Facebook but has since been uploaded to YouTube:

For the record, I’m with SSTG. Bike thieves suck, but I refuse to have life lessons taught by some vigilante junkie who provided no proof that the kid in the video was guilty of what he accused him of. Quite frankly I was embarrassed for all the people ball washing this loser and congratulating him on teaching the alleged thief a lesson. Great blog on her part. He’s an attention whore who wanted to prove what a hardo he was, and he broke the law on video in order to prove it.

I called the East Bridgewater Police today after hearing a rumor that Chris Martin was arrested. They confirmed to me that they are aware of the video but they can’t comment because it’s an ongoing investigation. I also spoke with Zach, the alleged thief. He wants to clear his name and share his side of the story so he’ll be joining me on YouTube Live tonight after the Bruins game. Chris Martin is also welcomed to come on if he’s not in jail, and I’ve messaged him on Facebook to extend an invitation. You can watch it by subscribing to our YouTube channel by clicking here, or just watch it live on this blog.



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12 Comment(s)
  • Kim Wescott
    May 10, 2019 at 2:55 pm

    Did this get posted on YouTube? Usually I can bring up your YouTube’s the next day. But when I tried to open this one, it just says ‘waiting for Turtleboy’


  • randiguy2006
    Randall Guy
    May 10, 2019 at 9:50 am


    Were WAITINGGGGG!!!!!!!!

    Did your truck battery die?

    • Well, No Shit
      May 10, 2019 at 1:21 pm

      I think your mom stole it to power her vibrator. It takes a lot of amperage to flick that gargantuan bean.

      See? I can make juvenile mom jokes too.

  • Huckleberry
    May 10, 2019 at 7:18 am

    Carver needs to be cleaned up. The police look the other way. They should be looking into the Doctor, that half the town sees and how they get paid to write out scripts of adderall and Xanax. It’s disgusting. The police DO know about it. They just don’t care. One of the biggest snitches in Carver on great meadow drive, goes and buys dope and what ever else they want to do for drugs that day off, and then tells the police about it right away, so that they won’t pull them over while driving a family members vehicle unlicensed. That has been going on for years and years. That town is going to hell fast! It was once a great place to live. Not anymore. It’s a small town with more drugs than a big city!

  • The lost souls of Carver
    May 10, 2019 at 6:30 am

    Yes he did get arrested. Because as many have said, this is far from the person who should teach ANY lesson. This lesson was a lot different then most that matin gives. Usually it goes like this…roll the piece of cotton to a small ball, draw up 5cc of water, put water on dope, heat spoon at the bottom to bring your dope to a slight boil, put needle in center of cotton and draw up. When done save your cotton for you next cotton shot. And when you stop breathing I will be sure to throw you in a snow bank instead of calling for help no matter who you are, even my life long childhood friend. Watch out for cotton fever friends!!

  • Well, No Shit
    May 9, 2019 at 7:24 pm

    This kid’s family should be on an all-out manhunt for Chris Martin.

    This kid {might} have stolen from that douche, and, if he did, he should be punished for his crime, BUT, as soon as Martin took it upon himself to “teach this kid a lesson,” he crossed a line.

    As a father of boys, I’m telling you that if Martin did this to my kids, I would grind that fucking dickbag into dust.

  • randiguy2006
    Randall Guy
    May 9, 2019 at 6:08 pm

    Hmmmmm embarrassing someone online without knowing all the facts?

    Who would do such a thing?

    Hey, by the way they catch that murderer in Springfield yet?

    • Well, No Shit
      May 9, 2019 at 7:17 pm

      Jesus, RG, you’re so fucking tedious.

      Find a new hangout, would you?

      • randiguy2006
        Randall Guy
        May 10, 2019 at 9:49 am

        OK I will.

        Whats your Mom’s address?

        • Well, No Shit
          May 10, 2019 at 1:10 pm

          Sorry, dude, but she no boom boom with soul brother. You’ll have to stick with fat white bitches and welfare queens with six baby daddies.

          • Truth
            May 10, 2019 at 3:59 pm

            Randall Guy is gay so your mom is safe.

    • murdochpatsymcreynolds
      Randall Guy's Dad
      May 9, 2019 at 10:16 pm

      Randy! Dumpster! Now!

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