Hoodrat Heroes

All-Star Springfield Mom Wants You To Pay For Her Kid’s Christmas Because She Blew All Her Money On Weed, Booze, And Newports, Forgot To Sign Up For Toys For Tots 

All-Star Springfield Mom Wants You To Pay For Her Kid’s Christmas Because She Blew All Her Money On Weed, Booze, And Newports, Forgot To Sign Up For Toys For Tots

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Here’s another winner out of Springfield…..

A single mother trying to give her daughter a nice first Christmas. How sweet. Really tugs at the heartstrings when you see stuff like this.

LOL. Just kidding. You can tell just from her mastery of the English language that her Facebook page would be a ratchtacular cornicopia. That and the fact that she somehow “missed” the sign up for toys for tots. Lots of responsible parents forget to sign up for free Christmas gifts when they know they can’t afford any.

And of course the first thing you see on her Facebook page is…..

Dog filter and tittoos. My mind is already made up, but of course there’s more.

Surely Amanda Ayala has budgeted properly and is only reaching out to strangers to finance her Christmas because she’s exhausted all other options, right?

Newport 100’s. Never saw that one coming. Goes well with vodka, Coronas and blunts to the face 100 emoji.

But remember, she’s very stressed right now because she’s “trying to be the best single mom.” This is what the best single moms do. They blow all their money on liquor, weed, and cigarettes. Especially weed:

Hey Amanda, here’s an idea to save a couple bucks. First of all, stop smoking blunts. Smoke bowls instead. I know it’s ghettofabulous and Jersey shorish to strictly stick to blunts. But they’re pretty wasteful when you think about it. A blunt probably has 5-6 bowl packs in it. You can get a nice buzz off a bowl pack by yourself. You don’t need to waste all that weed on a blunt.

Secondly, you live in Springfield. There’s plenty of dirt shwagg around everywhere. Stop blowing all your money on sour this and blue haze that. Just get the generic shit from Diego at a quarter of the price. It won’t be the same but it will get the job done. Just sayin.

She’s also got plenty of cash for Ubers


Kelly Bundy dresses

And of course Jordan’s and Timberland’s for the baby:

Because that’s what good parents value. Not financial stability, or education, or values. Jordan’s and Timz are what really matter. This is like a crash course in how to never, ever get out of Springfield.

Oh, and did I mention she lives in public housing?

So it’s not enough that taxpayers subsidize her housing, give her food stamps (there’s a 1,000% chance she’s got stamps), and her poor life decisions. Now she wants you to pay for her kid’s Christmas because she blew all the Xmas cash on blunts, booze, and Newports.

Naturally the post has been removed before we could screenshot all the comments. But you can imagine what was there. A bunch of white women from Amherst telling the ratchet’s critics that “we don’t know her story,” and that she “doesn’t have a family to support her,” and blah, blah, blah. Because this is what these feel good ding dongs do. They pretend people like this are all honest, because they never went to school with anyone like this, and they intentionally chose to live far, far away from them. They pretend like our world isn’t filled with con-artists who make a living ripping off the system, because it would disrupt their narrative.

Anyway, Christmas doesn’t even matter until your kid turns 2, and her kid isn’t even a year old yet. Nothing matters less than a baby’s first Christmas. They have no clue what’s going on. They don’t understand the concept of material possessions. They don’t have any idea who Santa is. And they won’t remember any of it. Amanda could literally just hand the girl her leftover blunt raps and car keys and her baby would have hours upon hours of entertainment.

28 Comment(s)
  • Santa
    December 6, 2017 at 2:15 pm

    Willing to donate toys and semen to this young mother.

  • Egypt’s Daddy Tell Didi Suck a Dick
    December 5, 2017 at 6:14 am

    Tell her I got a a couple dollaz if she hold her breath and starts clucking her head like a chicken around my lap. Gobble Gobble I’ll buy her kids Used Shopkins and hatchimals But only if she swallow the throat yogurt. If she doesn’t, The kids are gonna get shitty board games with missing pieces.

  • Turtleboy Nation
    December 4, 2017 at 9:35 pm

    This is why I don’t vote Democrats. Trump should deport Elizabeth Warren and this scumbag of a mom

  • Name
    December 4, 2017 at 7:35 pm

    Is her skin tone dark enough to qualify for the Didi Delgado white guilt fund? I guess we would have to hear from the many many women that have benefited from that fund. Allegedly they all are named Didi (Elizabeth)

  • Fed up teacher and taxpayer
    December 4, 2017 at 6:58 pm

    I teach in this city – sad but definitely not surprising. Great Mama she is.. getting high while baby is sleeping. How can you respond to a child waking up with a wet diaper, teething, fever, or emergency if your stoned out of your mind smoking blunts and drinking Coronas? So is Mommy Dearest stepping outside to smoke those blunts and cigs? More than likely NOT. In a few more years I’ll sit across from Miss Ayal in my classroom and hear her exclaim, “I don’t know why my baby has such bad asthma!” It’s because your lazy ass smokes in the house!!

  • Amazing
    December 4, 2017 at 6:31 pm

    Swear to turtle this just saved my life. I wish I never stoped smoking weed. I can however afford it and am not on assistance of any kind. I do t want to drink and miss the ganja so much. Thank you turtle, from the bottom of my heart!

  • itsjustme
    December 4, 2017 at 6:30 pm

    I’m so glad I have the turtle so I know where my tax dollars go.

  • bleh
    December 4, 2017 at 5:32 pm

    ” And they won’t remember any of it”…much like Amanda.

  • TJB
    December 4, 2017 at 4:47 pm

    Switch to natty lights. There like $8 for a 12 pack. You can use the pull tops to make a necklace for the kid.

    • NH Tuna Tit
      December 4, 2017 at 10:13 pm

      high life 18 pack $8.99 at market basket. Natty ice $14.99 30 pack ftw

  • ElJefe72
    December 4, 2017 at 3:27 pm

    Beer, alcohol, cigars, pot, etc…I’m sure her breath smells like fresh roses.

  • Chip Striker
    December 4, 2017 at 3:00 pm

    It’s a Didi Delgado Christmas!!

    • Netflicks n chill
      December 5, 2017 at 10:16 am

      She looks like she could be black, I could be wrong. But if she is I’m sure Didi dumpster would love to help her out. They can chill and smoke a blunt of sour diesel together.

  • GraftonHillGirl
    December 4, 2017 at 2:47 pm

    Because pot is LEGAL.

    • Finn
      December 4, 2017 at 3:21 pm

      Yeah, it’s legal – but it’s intended for people who can responsibly use it (not for shitty parents who put their own needs first).

    • LocalYokel
      December 4, 2017 at 3:41 pm

      Not at a Federal level, which is where all the pass-through money for the State programs comes from.

    • Heebie Peterson
      December 6, 2017 at 9:12 am

      Tell that to the Federal government (which is where she gets her AFDC money from). Pretty sure they still think it’s illegal.

  • Lynda Lapine
    December 4, 2017 at 2:09 pm

    Toys for Tots isn’t the only organization that gives gifts to needy kids. She could try the local fire and police departments, the local churches and ask them for help. OR, try saving a few bucks a couple months ahead of time for her child’s first Christmas. As someone suggested, a dollar store has tons of stuff. A kid’s first Christmas isn’t going to be expensive, believe me. They’re happy with anything. How old is this kid?

  • SVU
    December 4, 2017 at 2:01 pm

    Wrap a few boxes that’s all kids who are one care about. And then buy a few toys. Even at the dollar store. Every mother wants to give their child a wonderful xmas no matter what their age is, but if you don’t have money cause you bought shit you shouldn’t have then it’s on you. And you should be thankful they are only one, so they don’t know how shitty you are as a parent.

    • itsjustme
      December 4, 2017 at 10:42 pm

      Exactly. I remember my oldest first Christmas, I wrapped diapers, wipes, baby shampoo, a couple toys, but mostly stuff she needed. She played with the wrapping paper more than anything

  • Finn
    December 4, 2017 at 1:50 pm

    How is that baby *not* getting high from this skank’s 2nd hand smoke?

    • Becky Blueline
      December 4, 2017 at 7:32 pm

      That was my first thought. That poor child doesn’t stand a chance in life with… THAT as a parent. What that child needs for Christmas is to be put in a nice, cozy, weed and nicotine-free stocking and then wake up under another family’s tree on Christmas morning.

      And I’m sorry, but what the HELL is sour?? These weed and whatever else posts these people put up are in a whole other language.

      • itsjustme
        December 4, 2017 at 10:38 pm

        I was wondering that too, she used another term I also didn’t know either but I’m assuming they are nicknames for pot. I seriously can’t believe the stuff people post, especially when the post is public, for everyone to read.
        I mean she is obviously a horrible mother but does she not care if the world thinks that as well? Honestly I don’t care what people think about me, unless it comes to my children and then I care because I would never want someone to think I am not taken care of them, or I am not a good mother. I guess maybe that’s just me.

      • weeeeed
        December 23, 2017 at 3:18 pm

        sour diesel strain i think

  • Lisa
    December 4, 2017 at 1:43 pm

    Remind me again how drug testing for welfare recipients would be wasteful spending?

    • Lala
      December 4, 2017 at 3:51 pm

      It would make way more sense to test for nicotine than to test for marijuana.

      • Stupidpeoplemakemenutz
        December 4, 2017 at 9:31 pm

        How does this comment even make any fucken sense??? You must be related to her!!

      • Finn
        December 5, 2017 at 12:01 am

        How is that brainiac? Do tell. [grabs popcorn]

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