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If you ever wanna feel better about yourself and have a good laugh at the same time then check out the Facebook page appropriately titled “Your Probably From Worcester MA If……” It’s like someone blew into a giant vuvuzela that that can be heard in every neighborhood in the city. And the horn’s sound specifically attracts Worcester’s finest who just can’t help sharing with the world whatever magnificent things are going on in their brilliant minds.
The winner today was this beautiful post:
Hey Worcester Police? Why are you pulling people over in non-inspected cars? I mean, why should Jeffrey Snow have to follow the rules? Didn’t you guys get the memo? Either his car can’t pass inspection or he just doesn’t feel like getting off the couch to get it inspected. Doesn’t matter which. The bottom line is that rules simply don’t apply to him. Plus, you cops were specifically given a choice – pull this guy over or arrest people for murder. It was one or the other and you chose this guy. Thanks WPD!!!
What kind of car you driving anyway Jeff?
Of course you drive a 1983 Chevette with a loud exhaust. Because…of course you do.
Sure that 83 Chevette probably makes more noise than an angry teenage girl from Canterbury Street, but Jeff Snow doesn’t have to get it inspected because he has developed a fool-proof way to ensure that the fuzz doesn’t hassle him:
How come he never got the car inspected?
AH-HA!! We’ve found the culprit here – Responsibility!! It’s not his fault he didn’t get a new inspection sticker. It was really confusing with the number thing on it. I mean, how was he supposed to figure out what month “4” is? Is that even a month? Although who am I kidding? We all know that Jeff here just couldn’t figure out what month started with the letter “R.”
Regardless, none of that matters because Jeff has a pretty rock solid defense:
New rule – don’t use the south as an example of what to do in life. Ever. Down south you also don’t need to be able to spell, take your kids to the dentist, or marry outside of the family. And things are going just fine for them!!
One thing about my boy Jeff here is that THE MAN will never be able to take away his Chevette. Because this fucking guy loves Chevettes more than I love Mrs. Turtleboy and Turtleboy Jr. COMBINED!!
Yea, Chevettes last a “whole better” than new cars. Because if I had to choose between a brand new 2015 Maxima and an 83 Chevette I’d have to be wasted not to go with the Chevette. It’s really a no-brainer. They are a million times better than brand new cars. Well, except for the fact that they can’t pass inspection. Luckily Jeff here has a back up plan:
Of course you did Jeff. Of course you did. It’s too bad you stopped doing that today though because a fake sticker might’ve come in handy. Then the cops could’ve done their job and stopped that murderer instead of pulling you over. It was one or the other. Obviously this whole thing was a conspiracy to keep Chevettes off the road:
I don’t know about you all, but I’m sick and tired of this blatant discrimination against 83 Chevettes. I think it’s about time to stage a protest march. Who’s gonna join me and Jeff here tomorrow at 4 PM to stand in traffic with signs saying, “Black Chevettes Matter”? Where’s professor Sonya Conner when you need her? This is clearly a class issue too:
So let me get this straight. You got pulled over while driving a vehicle that you haven’t driven in five months? Gotcha. All you rich people with your fancy inspection stickers and functioning engines don’t know what it’s like for us Chevette owners. Maybe we should bring signs to tomorrow’s Chevette rally saying, “I Can’t Drive, I Can’t Drive!!”
Speaking of whiny protesters, I’m assuming this guy is some 20 year old kid who doesn’t like rules right?
Yea back in the glory days of the Carter administration it was literally anarchy. No one had to get their car inspected, or pay taxes, or flush the toilet after taking a gigantic smash. I miss those days.
I have to admit, I can’t help but admire his “fuck it” mentality to life. Who taught you to handle life in such a cavalier manner?
Yes, he obviously taught you very well. Which explains why you got pulled over in a car that hasn’t been driven in five months.
Anyway, Turtleboy’s doing a ride along with the WPD tomorrow, so maybe I’ll get a chance to talk about some of this blatant anti-Chevette discrimination going on in Worcester. I got your back Jeff Snow. Keep fighting The Man and never, ever get that beautiful, magnificent car of yours inspected.
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