Barstool Sports is falling apart and I can’t get enough of it. Here’s a quick background of what happened this week. A bootleg Media Matters Twitter account decided to post some 2016 clips of Dave Portnoy, Big Cat, and KFC making jokes about Colin Kaepernick and dropping the n word while quoting rap lyrics.
That was vintage Prez. His whole character is just him being authentically him. He’s a guy who doesn’t care about politics or social issues really. He just likes to make inappropriate jokes, and they’re hilarious.
“I thought he was an ISIS guy. Throw a head wrap on this guy and he’s a terrorist.”
“Maybe he was on Palestine’s side or something.”
“He’s black? I thought he was Arabic. When I hear an Arabic person isn’t standing for the national anthem, I go terrorist right away.”
“If he was related to Osama bin Laden, would you be like ‘oh my God’?”
“If you do blackface with 2 black dudes, it’s OK.
Comedy is subjective. If you haven’t followed Portnoy for years you might not think it’s funny. If you’re somebody who understands his comedic style and have followed him for years, you spit out your coffee laughing at that statement. Because it’s hilarious and you can’t get content like that in many places on the interwebz. What’s always made him unique and successful is that he has original, real takes, and he never backs down from him no matter the outrage. This is a guy who published a picture of Tom Brady’s 1 year old son naked, and said that the kid had a huge howitzer. It was funny because he did, and he stands by it to this day, even after getting visited by the State Police.
Jemele Hill and the blue checkmarks started tweeting it out, and the next thing you knew Portnoy issued a statement saying that he was “uncancellable” and that “You don’t cancel me, I cancel you.” Then he made a video vowing to never bend a knee.
“Im not gonna bend the knee.”
Emergency Press Conference – Cancel Culture Is Coming For My Head pic.twitter.com/FS3SCMd0BP
— Dave Portnoy (@stoolpresidente) June 29, 2020
But KFC and Big Cat did in blogs. This blog right here from KFC might be the most pathetic representation of what Huffstool Sports has become.
I stupidly lumped all that together under one umbrella of “protesting” and didnt acknowledge how justified and dire Colin’s cause was. I am 100,000% OK with being the white guy who was uneducated and confused by Colin Kaepernick in 2016, day 1 of the protest news, and now fully on board with him with a full understanding of his movement in 2020. I am proof positive Colin Kaepernick’s protest worked. Proof positive his peaceful demonstration is one of the most, if not the most, successful Civil Rights protest of all time.
The most successful Civil Rights protest of all time??? Are you fucking kidding me? He got a blogger to fall for some bullshit that completely ignores the fact that there is no epidemic of police killing unarmed black men. He got his scam to go mainstream. The Birmingham March directly led to the Civil Rights Act. The Selma March led to the Voting Rights Act. Colin Kaepernick’s led to a Nike endorsement.
I was a dumb white guy stumbling through all the do’s and dont’s of that shit thinking you had to look a certain way or have a certain background to be speaking out for a certain cause. Thinking that you had to be “black enough” to say innocent people shouldnt be murdered is just asinine.
This is a comedy website.
In a perfect world, we’d all be as selfless and have as much perspective as Kaep and any of the Civil Rights leaders, but we live in the real world. The world which Kaep was, and still is, trying to change by reaching people the exact way he reached me. He’s not gonna convert any of the extremists of the world who are racist, hateful bigots. But he could, and did, reach a guy like me who was uneducated to a fault. Who was ignorant enough to the ways of the world to the point that he didnt even realize that his knee jerk reaction was a shitty and stupid one.
Racist, hateful bigots. That’s what people are who think Colin Kaepernick is full of shit.
It got worse.
So, yes, hand up. I will admit it. I am brave enough to confess – Colin Kaepernick’s Peaceful Protest reached me and changed me. Wish I didnt have to be “reached” and “changed,” but I did, and I’m happy as fuck that I have. And I’m extremely happy to be living proof of just how successful the Black Lives Matter movement is. I wish MORE people would talk about this type of Before and After. Shine a light on me, folks.
Its pretty embarrassing that it took up until George Floyd for me, and many others, to finally get it. To finally understand. But I’d be way more embarrassed if I was one of the people who didnt get there at all. If you’re making the type of comments I did back then, today in 2020, then raise your hand and I’ll have Tommy Boy here come back there and hit you in the head with a tack hammer because you’re a RE..ALLY STUPID ASSHOLE.
No, what’s pretty embarrassing is what you have become. A self-deprecating moron who has no idea what he’s talking about. Someone who thinks the killing of a man in Minnesota is somehow evidence of an epidemic of black men being killed by cops.
Then later in the week his employees started revolting against him. PFT wrote a blog shitting on Dave.
I don’t know exactly how to fix this short of making Willie Dave’s boss, but I do know that what’s happened over the last 4 days is not going to work in the long-term.
Willie Colon, Liz Gonzalez, and several others who would be nothing without the company he built, all complained about how he wouldn’t apologize. But guess what? That’s what makes him El Prez. He’s the guy who doesn’t back down. Ever. He’s been harassed and boycotted by feminists for years, and once said:
Even though I never condone rape if you’re a size 6 and you’re wearing skinny jeans you kind of deserve to be raped right?
That’s a million times more offensive than saying the n word while singing a song, or making jokes about the Great Patron Saint Colin Kaepernick. In our society you can post naked pictures of kids and make rape jokes, as long as you’re doing comedy. But you can’t say the n word in a rap song or else a 350 pound tough guy like Willie Colon will get his feelings hurt. That dude must’ve stolen my white fragility.
This was a chance to take very valid criticism to heart. Instead, it turned into doubling down on being wrong and saying people are triggered if they took offense which are the same things Dave did to us and the same things we were trying to fight against https://t.co/CBCLcs5Yyr
— Trill Withers (@TylerIAm) July 2, 2020
The bootleg Media Matters is going after Barstool’s advertisers (our advertisers have been getting harassed and boycotted since before it was cool) too.
By the way, this is the guy who bought Barstool the first time.
Sad time in America. Years of systemic racism exacerbated by a racist president. We must do better beginning with change in November. Our country’s soul is at stake, and we must all affect change.
— Peter Chernin (@PeterChernin) June 1, 2020
How’d kissing their asses work out for you there Peter?
Finally Dave put out this video last night, which is basically him trying to please his employees who are openly revolting against him, and still pretend that he’s not bending a knee.
Emergency Press Conference – Barstool State of Union pic.twitter.com/rliRpzkKe7
— Dave Portnoy (@stoolpresidente) July 2, 2020
You can tell that for the first time he hates this aspect of his job. For the first time the cancel culture has hurt him good, because they came from within. He hired too many SJWs and the poisoned the waters. What these ungrateful cunts should recognize, is that they are nothing without the infrastructure that Dave Portnoy created. He built this by saying shit like he did about Kaepernick. If you can’t deal with that then fuck off and get a new job. That’s what he should’ve said. He’s Dave Portnoy. There is no Barstool Sports without him, and the company loses insane value if he’s not there anymore. He has all the leverage. Threaten to walk away and they’ll immediately realize that they can lose a lot more than some advertisers.
Everyone pretends to act like they’ve evolved from their old views, but they really haven’t. It’s just what you have to say now. Those jokes were funny in 2016 and they’re even funnier now. Stand by it and people will respect you more. You might lose an advertiser, but you’ll get more Barstool Gold sales. And when in doubt do everything Tucker Carlson does.
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