Nudniks

Bitch Boi Mayor Joe Curtatone Is Suing Kirk Minihane, Barstool Sports Because He’s So Dumb That He Fell For The Cullen In The Tailpipe Fake Interview Routine

 

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Last week we published a blog about Kirk Minihane’s Barstool Sports debut, in which he pretended to be disgraced Boston Globe reporter Kevin Cullen, in order to get an interview with Somerville Mayor Joe Curtatone. Curtatone is the virtue signaling mayor who pretended to give a shit about women by clutching his pearls when the Bruins let Barstool advertise on their Stanley Cup playoff towels.

Since Minihane now works for Barstool there was no way Curtatone would ever do an interview with him. But he would do an interview with a guy most famous for being suspended because he repeatedly lied in columns and in interviews about being at the Boston Marathon bombing. That about sums up the kind of media Joe Curtatone prefers covering him in a nutshell. Watch the interview if you haven’t already, it’s the funniest shit I’ve ever seen.

Well, this happened today:

Curtatone Complaint and Jur… by on Scribd


A lot of politicians would’ve been so thoroughly embarrassed that they fell for the ol’ Cullen in the tailpipe routine that they’d gracefully pretend it never happened. Not bitch boi though. He draws more attention to himself by filing a lawsuit in superior court. Today, by the way, is Minihane’s first official day as a Barstool employee. Welcome aboard.

It’s just so amazing how tone deaf this idiot is.

When we get sued it stings because we’re not a multi million dollar company. Barstool will fight this and get it dismissed because money means very little to them, and they’re likely not worried about it very much. The lawsuit itself is absolutely hilarious. First of all, they fucked up because it states that Minihane was a Barstool employee at the time.

That’s just patently false and easy to prove.

It whines about the “marry, fuck, kill” blogs,” quotes “sexist” jokes from years ago, complains that they’ve used the word “cunt” before, and lists “guess that ass” and “grading the newest sex scandal teacher” blogs as evidence of wrongdoing.

It lists a Boston Herald column, which completely fabricated a story about date rape at a Barstool party, as evidence.

According to Portnoy none of that ever happened, and now that Curtatone is citing it in a legal document to sue Barstool, that means Barstool could sue the Herald since clearly people are believing their lies. I hope they do just because I live for drama like this that doesn’t involve us getting sued for once.

This is the one area I think they could be in a little trouble:

In the wake of Curtatone and the Herald condemning Barstool, Portnoy took to Twitter and also published several blogs accusing Curtatone of being a criminal, arsonist, extortionist, and other naughty things. The problem is that for a reference Portnoy used Somerville News Weekly as a source. We’ve blogged about this outfit, owned by local boob William Tauro before. He literally just makes shit up about Curtatone, including that he’s being investigated by the FBI for racketeering, because he doesn’t like Curtatone.

One of our former bloggers, Manch, fell for Tauro’s bullshit too. He made up a lie that the nudnik who pissed on the veteran’s memorial in Somerville was on suicide watch after trying to flee to Oregon. Manch, like Portnoy, fell for it, because they wanted to believe it was true, which is a big reason why Manch no longer works here. After he spoke with Unc he took her blog down.

But either way, that’s not libel in this case. In order to prove libel against a public figure you have to prove the following:

  • That what was printed was a lie (can prove)
  • That the person who printed it knew it was a lie and printed it with malice anyway (can’t prove, since he just cited a bullshit source he found on Google)
  • That the plaintiff has suffered damages as a result of this (can’t prove since Curtatone gets the same salary as mayor regardless)

Not gonna happen.

I spit out my coffee at this part:

Speaking of fragile ego, remind me who’s  the mayor of a large city suing someone in superior court because they got punked like a bad episode of the Jerky Boys.

He literally spells out his own stupidity in the complaint.

Here’s an idea – confirm it’s actually Cullen before conducting the interview. Literally anyone could’ve pulled this off, not just Minihane. Did they not have caller ID in Somerville? He’s literally admitting here that he’s a dumbass who fell for this obvious prank because Minihane’s Cullen impression was too good not to believe.

They’re also claiming wiretapping laws.

Again, this would be a lot easier to prove if Curtatone wasn’t the mayor of a city, and acting as one during the interview. Bad news for him according to guy in the comments:

Guys in the comments are almost never wrong. That’s just science.

Here’s my question – who’s paying for this? He’s being represented by Lenny Kesten, the attorney who represented the state troopers who were disciplined for not redacting Alli Bibaud’s arrest report (a story we broke). I have no idea what Lenny charges, but he’s got an office on Boylston Street, so I’m sure it’s not cheap. You think Joe Curtatone is taking money out of his menial Mayor’s salary to pay for this? Fat chance. So the question is, are the taxpayers of Somerville paying all this money to support Curtatone’s shattered ego, because he did a 20 minute interview with a guy pretending to be Kevin Cullen? If so, I’d ask for a refund, but most people in Somerville are morons anyway so they probably will applaud this.

He posted this on Sunday:

Newsflash Joe – Kirk Minihane is your Daddy now.

 

 

 

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32 Comment(s)
  • LOB
    June 18, 2019 at 5:17 pm

    this is better than the Sopranos’ … Tony had nothing on Curtatone!

  • Mia Curtatone
    June 18, 2019 at 4:42 pm

    Turtleboy is a skinner pedofile and yous readers are all straight LOOSAHS. My family owns more property in somerville then all you dirt poor scumbags combined. Seriously instead of being jealous of my family why don’t you focus on your family and your shitty minimum wage jobs – maybe one day you can save up a little money and take a vacation with ur familys and you wont be so bitter n jealous. My uncle runs somerville, my aunt drives a new mercedes every couple years, and you jerkoofs are reading this article on your lunchbreak at burger king.

    • The clenched starfish
      June 19, 2019 at 5:48 pm

      ahahahahaha….you illiterate skank maybe your phony fanook family can pay to send you back to remedial english. I wouldn’t brag about things you don’t have. So tell me mia what do YOU own? what do YOU make? I guarantee one of my boston properties is worth more than your shitty somerville hovels combined.

  • Stoolies are losers
    June 18, 2019 at 2:32 pm

    3 assholes. Kirk is a self destructive jerk, Curatone is a corrupt wannabe Cuomo and Portnoy is beneath comtempt.

    I have to root for Mayor Joe here. Kirk whored himself out and got in bed with that bearded clam Portnoy.

    Anything that costs Portnoy money I’m rooting for

    • LOB
      June 18, 2019 at 5:30 pm

      Google this … Curtatone, arrest records, police reports, court findings, this is a family of criminals ! Joe is not a nice guy!

  • Burlando Castile
    June 18, 2019 at 10:16 am

    That interview was fucking badass!!!! All I was waiting for was for Kirk to throw in “Listen, Joe, I gotta ask ya’s but did Lipinsky ever try to give you the hucklebuck?”

  • MIA CURTATONE
    June 18, 2019 at 9:48 am

    YALL R JUS JELLOUSE OF MY FAMLIY

    • Mia's yeast infection
      June 18, 2019 at 2:35 pm

      Mia, your family is white trash and criminals. You have several arrests and look like a heroin addict.

      NO ONE will ever be jealous of your trashy family. Oh, is Cosmo curatone your dad? What does he have, 12 restraining orders, an arrest for rape and a few for domestic violence? Nice family. lol

    • That's CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow
      June 18, 2019 at 3:02 pm

      aaargh! what language thee be speaking wench?

  • Dear Mr. Mayor
    June 18, 2019 at 7:09 am

    You are likely reading this, so :
    You are a whiny, sniveling little cunt !
    Grow a pair, you fucking fanook !
    You got pranked.
    Why?
    Because you are a self-important little asshole who thought he’d get some quick “good press”.
    Instead, you got had !
    Instead of realizing your own gullibility and stupidity, you instead whine and cry like a little girl.
    What a tool !

  • Chuck
    June 17, 2019 at 11:52 pm

    Little boy, with kind of a big job?

  • Said Nobody
    June 17, 2019 at 11:23 pm

    Wow is Somerville lucky to have this mayor

  • Jefe
    June 17, 2019 at 11:02 pm

    Curtatone bangs his secretaries. I know this 100% for fact. Just like the rest of his family, he is total piece of shit.

  • CrispyC
    June 17, 2019 at 10:51 pm

    Honestly this guy is like a female AOC. Big-mouthed moron Democrat that really would just be better keeping quiet. These two love to advertise how fucking dumb they are.

    • Joey Bag Of Donuts
      June 17, 2019 at 10:54 pm

      A dumb spic will replace him soon. The demographics will shift and mr shiftless will lose power.

  • I hate commies
    June 17, 2019 at 10:27 pm

    Curtatone is a shit-fingered nose picking commie advertising his own gullibility. What an absolute buffoon this fucking demcomm is….

  • Barry
    June 17, 2019 at 10:21 pm

    That was amazing. I can’t believe someone under a direct line of questioning can talk that long without giving an answer. That guy could have gone all day. If he’s used to rambling on until the other person just throws their hands in the air and says “fuck it” then I shutter to think of what Somerville’s legal bills are going to look like. Lawyers LOVE guys like this. He probably burned through the retainer with his first phone call.

    • Big Wick
      June 18, 2019 at 10:51 am

      Agreed. He certainly emulates, and probably aspires to be the next, Andrew F’ing Cuomo, Emperor of the (crumbling) Empire State. (Who, BTW, just ramrodded into law allowing illegal aliens to obtain NYS drivers licenses.)

  • True justice
    June 17, 2019 at 9:45 pm

    Wow. Kirk, welcome back.exposing frauds for us to see is much appreciated. Keep up the good fight

  • Saul Goodman
    June 17, 2019 at 6:56 pm

    Mr. Mayor what are your damages? We can make shit up if you want. Like $15 bucks for your time? Let’s say $15,000? That’s the ticket!

  • Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs
    June 17, 2019 at 6:23 pm

    This may make Kirk take more time off to address his suicidal tendencies.

    • whatevuh
      June 17, 2019 at 8:48 pm

      I’m sure he’s gonna need an emotional support animal, such a waste of oxygen

  • Mayor Sausage Sucker Mayo on the chin
    June 17, 2019 at 6:15 pm

    Orange Sunglass frames and Tie, is it Halloween in June does the dishonorable Mayo eat corn the long way?

  • whatevuh
    June 17, 2019 at 6:10 pm

    “yawn” who the fuck cares what goes on at Barstool Sports, and Kirk Minihane is so fucked up in the head, he can’t even handle “life” I’m sure he needs a support animal of some sort, possibly a peacock, cuz they are pretty

  • Joey Meatball
    June 17, 2019 at 5:40 pm

    Ah yo ah yo my whole family tree is littered with felons.

  • Turtz McGurtz
    June 17, 2019 at 5:06 pm

    Much like herpes, Joe is the gift that keeps on giving. Speaking of which, whatever happened to his skank ass niece Mia?

    • ncfoothillbilly
      June 17, 2019 at 5:41 pm

      Shes still turning tricks at the local truck stop.

    • Mayor Douche
      June 17, 2019 at 6:19 pm

      She applies hemorrhoid cream to fat sweaty trucks drivers with her tongue her flamboyant uncle taught her how.

      • Captain Trips
        June 17, 2019 at 7:33 pm

        And that’s after a long drive on a sweaty seat cushion

    • Always In Trouble
      June 18, 2019 at 12:23 am

      Ask the Everett Police
      They were looking for her last week. Inquiring minds want to know

  • THE Nigerian Prince
    June 17, 2019 at 4:51 pm

    Joe Curtatone, mayor extraordinaire, WAH WAH WAH. You got PRANKED, sap! Take your sad excuse for a savvy politico and crawl back into the sewer. Oh, and I have 20 million dollars I need to safely get out of Nigeria. Please to call me and help arrange for transfer to you.
    1-800-YOU-LOSE

    #pranked

  • Joe Curtatone
    June 17, 2019 at 4:43 pm

    I am dum.

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