Hoodrat Heroes

Chodie Arias Whines On Salem Facebook Group That No One Came To Her Crotch Fruit’s Birthday Party While Whining That Every Guy In Her Inbox Is Trying To Smash


Last year I did a blog calling out these attention seeking pork grenades who feel the need to post sad pictures of their kids alone at birthday parties that no one showed up. If no one shows up to your crotch fruit’s annual celebration for not dying in the last 365 days, it’s probably because you’re a miserable person to be around. I’ve never once heard of anyone I know having this problem. Not even close. Everyone with kids knows how the social contract goes – if you don’t come to my crotch fruit’s birthday party, I’m not going to your’s. You have to go to birthday parties when you’re invited, unless you hate the person so much that you know you’re not inviting them to your party.

Well it happened again in a Salem group I’m in….

Oh fuck off with your dog filter, pity party bullshit. First of all, why would you EVER feel the need to post something like that on a community Facebook group? How does this pertain to a bunch of strangers who weren’t invited to your party in the first place? Oh right, it doesn’t. You’re just doing it because everyone you know is sick of your bullshit, so you decided to use your crotch fruit to garner sympathy for a bunch of strangers you haven’t dicked over yet instead. And wouldn’t ya know it? She got exactly the kind of reaction she wanted.

But guess what? Her kid’s not on Facebook so she isn’t gonna see any of those. This was never about her kid, it was about her.

Here’s an idea – if you weren’t so dreadful to be around people might show up at your kid’s party. You have to be really, really, really awful for everyone on your guest list to not show up, knowing that your three year old suffers because of it.

Unless of course she didn’t invite anyone. She says right in her post, “My best friend and my Mom’s friend came as soon as they found out.”

You didn’t invite your self-proclaimed best friend, and you’re surprised no one showed up? Then who da fuq did you invite? Your shitbag siblings? You’ve known them your whole life so you should’ve realized their degenerate asses weren’t gonna show up.

This is what we’re dealing with here.

Tittooed Jodi Arias. Try smiling once in a while and maybe people won’t mind being in your presence.

This is her most recent post, which tells us a lot.

“Everyone wants to fuck me, wah, wah, wah!! I’m just trying to live my best life over here, but because my snatch is like a mutton magnet these hungry mother fuckers keep trying play coochy cornhole, why do I have to be cursed with being so hot? wah, wah, wah!!”

Here’s an idea – tell one of the guys in your inbox who’s bothering you to come to your kid’s party next time instead of being a salty clam to everyone you deal with.

Oh, and this explains a lot.

Yea, generally if you just moved here from another state a thousand miles away it’s gonna be hard to make enough friends to have a birthday party. Just sayin.

And where was your “fiance” Stan for this?

You’re engaged to a guy with a pube chinstrap named Stan. And that ladies and gentlemen, is why no one showed up to her kid’s birthday party. Mystery solved.

At the end of the day she got exactly what she wanted:

A free party. Because these posts ALWAYS lead to free shit.


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30 Comment(s)
  • Megan
    September 1, 2019 at 2:01 am

    NO ABSOLUTELY NO ONE WANTS TO FUCK THIS CHICK.. she looks like she has a face made of straight stone

  • Poops Magee
    August 23, 2019 at 9:49 am

    Take some bowel movement, smear it on her face!
    Liberal, liberal, you’re a disgrace!
    Take some bowel movement straight from your butt!
    Liberal, liberal, you’re a stupid slut!

  • Marblehead, not Salem
    August 23, 2019 at 6:37 am

    Her FB states she was from Marblehead, not Salem. My, how Marblehead has fallen. As someone from Marblehead, it used to be different back in the day. Not home to the likes of this gal. I left Marblehead in the late 80’s, except for the annual visits back there. It was very hometown, and many folks knew each other. Now, these Chrissi types are spoiling the town.

    • Batman
      August 23, 2019 at 7:54 am

      It’s not just Marblehead, look around, they are everywhere. Scumbag city, population everywhere. The fabric of all nice towns being destroyed. Can’t wait to gtfo here. N C here I come.

      • ncfoothillbilly
        August 23, 2019 at 10:30 pm

        Come on down…Ill have ya’ a nice cold glass of some NC hooch waitin’. One of my naybuhs is from Bahstun, but hes been here for about 20 years, so hes pretty well assimilated…ceptin’ for that accent.

        • Batman
          August 24, 2019 at 8:49 pm

          Ahhh, sounds like a blast and believe me, I cannot wait. Five year plan at this point, maybe four if all goes well. Might be ten but I’m like wind. Southern hospitality noted and graciously accepted, thank you kind sir.

  • Independent Thinker
    August 23, 2019 at 4:32 am

    “Going to break some faces.” Classy person. Just be careful about showing up at someone’s house with the intent of committing violence. You never know what may be waiting for you behind the door.

  • Judge dread
    August 23, 2019 at 2:52 am

    This is a dumpster fire hands down. Yet another slut that is pissed off after relocation she can’t get attention. Maybe you should slut fuck more you dumbass/whore.

  • Hate Women
    August 23, 2019 at 12:31 am

    Slut ape

  • Sarah Grove
    The Doctor
    August 22, 2019 at 11:20 pm

    The kid is 3. The kid doesn’t need a big party. Any party for a child under 4 is really for the person(s) throwing it.

  • brianmorris1976
    Dick Trickle
    August 22, 2019 at 9:25 pm

    Are her and her fiance related? They have the same last name. I love when washed up whores take their boyfriends last names before it’s legit. I have a feeling that marriage will never happen. Ever.

    • Captain Trips
      Captain Trips
      August 22, 2019 at 9:43 pm

      Of course not. He’s just throwing the marriage proposal in so he can continue to get his dick wet.

      He’ll either get sick of her or they’ll stay engaged for 25 years

  • Fred Knessl
    August 22, 2019 at 8:42 pm

    The child’s Father and his Family weren’t invited?

    • Captain Trips
      Captain Trips
      August 23, 2019 at 7:35 am

      The father probably woke up to that unsmiling miserable face once too often and burnt rubber right out of the driveway

      • Stunt Penis
        August 23, 2019 at 8:27 am

        Nailed it. Who wants to look at an unsmiling sour-puss all day? Life is too short to be with a miserable broad.

  • Jeff J
    Mary Kay Says
    August 22, 2019 at 8:31 pm

    Looks like she busted out the old Wagner Pro to put on that makeup. EASY on the foundation sista…..

    • Filtered
      August 23, 2019 at 7:46 pm

      It’s not makeup. It’s the filters these ratchets use to clean up their faces and makes them look ridiculous!

  • ncfoothillbilly
    August 22, 2019 at 8:13 pm

    This is exactly how she’ll look in her casket.

  • The Would
    August 22, 2019 at 7:49 pm

    Would. Even though she looks like the female version of Jonathan Davis minus the beard.

  • Two Patch Crappy Jack
    August 22, 2019 at 7:41 pm

    That right there is a good old fashioned Pig Bitch! Oink oink! All guys want to fuck me! Oink oink! Nobody likes my kid. Oink oink! Give me sympathy. Oink oink oink… Fucking douche

  • Sol Rosenberg
    August 22, 2019 at 7:37 pm


  • Jizzy Ftom The Rica
    August 22, 2019 at 7:07 pm

    Hop on the bus Gus.
    Make a new plan Stan.
    This bitch is with me.

  • Captain Trips
    Talent Scout
    August 22, 2019 at 5:07 pm

    Chrissi, this is the Talent Scout for many motion pictures.

    We are planning on another Addams Family sequel and Angelica Huston is not available as Mrs. Addams.

    You look perfect for the part. Drop me a line so we can discuss!

    • A
      August 23, 2019 at 7:17 am

      Wrong. Mrs.Addams is thin. This slut would need to catch “the disease” first, but with those filters it looks like she might be well on her way there.

  • Sara
    August 22, 2019 at 4:42 pm

    Man whoever wrote this must not have a life. Kinda creepy how much they stalked her page. Are you in love with her? Maybe a jealous ex because thats exactly what this sounds like. All up in her love life. Straight up stalker creepy. Does she need a restraining order from your ass?

    • Jenny Talia
      August 23, 2019 at 8:46 am

      Welcome to Turtleboy Chrissi…er…I mean Sara! You must be VERY new here!

  • murdochpatsymcreynolds
    Old Tom Morris
    August 22, 2019 at 4:05 pm

    NSTBabe, didn’t you get the interoffice memo? “Crotch Fruit” is out TBS is now implementing the expression “Vaj Goblin” in all correspondence going forward.

    • dowen0895
      Dick Scratcher
      August 23, 2019 at 2:38 am

      Semen Demon!!

  • hartf811
    August 22, 2019 at 3:55 pm

    If her kid wants to watch me bring her a party, I’m in.
    Keep the cake but she has to be her own chin wiper.

  • Ripsnorts
    August 22, 2019 at 3:45 pm

    Through bukkake tears, amiright?

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