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Cigarette Loving Westminster Local Boob Kicked Out Of Town Meeting For Loving America Is My New Hero

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So the other day we wrote about what a dumb idea it was for Westminster MA to try to ban the sale of cigarettes in their town. Obviously this would accomplish absolutely nothing. Obviously kids can’t purchase cigarettes legally anyway. Obviously people will still go into Fitchburg, Leominster, or any other sort of pagan cesspool of heathens to purchase their cancer sticks. Obviously.

Not surprisingly I’m not the only one who feels this way. Westminster had a town meeting conducted by their Board of Health, and it was abruptly ended by Andrea Crete, one of the three board members, when it turned into a rowdy-down!!

Sure, the residents of Westminster could’ve been a little more patient and respectful and they might’ve had their grievances heard. But this was way, way, more awesome. Singing “God Bless America”, having drunken townsfolk dragged out of an elementary school gymnasium by police, and watching some idiot from the Board of Health run away in fear because she doesn’t know how to run a meeting. This is EXACTLY what the founding fathers had in mind in their grand vision for America. I haven’t felt this patriotically aroused since I watch Bill Pullman save the planet in Independence Day. 

First I wanna say that this lady right here –

Andrea Crete Westminster Cigarettes Meeting Board of Health

sucks at life. This is what she had to say about the cigarette prohibition:

“We’re trying to save lives and prevent children from being future users.”

Newsflash – you’re not saving anyone’s life. You don’t matter that much. You’re just not that important. All you’re doing is inconveniencing people who wanna do the daily trip to Cumby’s for a pack of Marlboro Lights and thirty quick picks. Seriously though, get out of my face with all this “We’re saving the children” jive. You have to be a special kind of dumbass to think that kids from Westminster aren’t gonna smoke anymore because Andrea the Giant Dooshnozzle from the Westminster Board of Health is banning cigarettes. Like we said the other day, you’re just encouraging kids from Westminster to spend more time in Fitchburg now, and that’s NEVER a good idea for anyone. (JK, I love you Fitchburg.)

Anyway, the star of the show was this mother fucker right here:


I don’t know this guy’s name, and I can only assume he’s the local town drunk, but I fucking love this guy more than life itself. God bless you angry freedom lover, whoever you are. This angry bearded Irishman didn’t wanna hear your weak sauce Andrea Crete. Get the fuck out of his face!! You think he’s driving all the way to Leominster to buy a pack of smokes? Fuck no. You obviously underestimated how much these Patriots love FREEDOM!!!

I mean, if I’m starting a revolution tomorrow this is the first guy I’m getting. If this isn’t the face of someone who loves America and isn’t afraid to die for the stars and stripes

Screen Shot 2014-11-14 at 8.19.41 AM

then I don’t know what is.

Him and his buddies didn’t come to that meeting to hear Andrea Crete blabber on about saving the children

Westminster Town Meeting Cigarettes

they came to defend America from terrorists like the Westminster Board of Health. And they weren’t taking no for an answer. Show me someone who loves America more than this guy –

Screen Shot 2014-11-14 at 8.18.16 AM

Westminster Town Meeting Cigarettes

You can’t.

The bottom line is that Andrea Crete is a giant fraud. There’s a million different ways she could’ve handled this. Don’t like this freedom loving jingomaniac causing this disruption? Fine, kick his ass out. But there were clearly hundreds of other normal people there whose lives are going to be adversely affected by this. And she didn’t give them a chance to voice their opinions because having people disagree with her hurts her delicate sensibilities. Plus, it looks a lot more bad ass when you have to have a police escort from a town meeting:

Andrea Crete

Hey Andrea, here’s a thought. If you don’t want to be forced out of an elementary gymnasium with a police escort, then try to learn how to actually run a meeting. You’re doing something pretty controversial – something not one city or town in the entire country has ever done before. You don’t get smiles, rainbows, and stickers when you do that. If you really, truly believe in what you’re doing then at least have the decency to stand up and face the music.

Feel free to share your thoughts to keep the conversation going.

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27 Comment(s)
  • Kathy
    November 16, 2014 at 9:08 pm

    This is about democracy not ciggarettes.If something that would negatively affect Westminster s economy and peoples personal freedoms so mich is going to happen it should be the will of the people through voting.I hope everyone realizes how important it is to exercise their right to vote.

  • Jean Popik
    November 15, 2014 at 9:32 pm

    OK, Mike T — let’s not get personal here. Vincent’s Country Store is doing nothing wrong — it is a family-run business that has been extremely generous to those in need here in Westminster for the past 20 or so years. They are selling nothing that is illegal in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. As with anything that is legally sold here in the Commonwealth, the buyer is responsible for his or her own choices, whether it be smoking, drinking, gambling or overindulging in sugary foods. Banning the sale of any such items will only make the purchaser more determined to take their business elsewhere. And as far as targeting children — let’s get real here. Kids are going to test the waters anyway. Banned sodas and sugary drinks at the local schools here in town and in Ashburnham and all that led to is some savvy students selling the contraband items out of their lockers. Ban tobacco sales and you will have those kids will access to older siblings and/or cars going into Gardner and Fitchburg and running their own little business on the side. There are better ways to handle the situation such as putting more effort into educating our kids about the dangers of smoking as well as drinking, drugs and reckless driving. On another note — I was also at the meeting and this article is right on the money about the BOH and its idiotic chairperson. Who came up with the idea of not clapping. I agree with the bottom line — Andrea if you can’t take the heat you shouldn’t be in the kitchen.

  • Anon
    November 15, 2014 at 3:23 pm

    Smoking should be banned, end of story. You can’t sell heroine, cocaine, meth, or any other harmful substance, can you? The idiots that smoke should take this as a warning. Grow up, accept some responsibility, and try to teach the next generation something useful. Why don’t you stand up for something that actually matters and would make a positive impact? Simply disgraceful.

    • J. Lipoff
      November 15, 2014 at 7:09 pm

      Anon– you should move to North Korea with Andrea. Aids, Ebola, bullets that scatter and spread into fifty pieces as soon as they hit flesh– let’s not make global warming feel left out! How about you act like an adult and let others live life the way they want and worry about yourself? Cigarettes are not going to be the end of humanity. Candy can cause diabetes, right? So maybe we should ban that too? Come to think of it, isn’t the air we breathe polluted? Fuck it– let’s ban breathing outdoors too!!!

    • Confused
      November 15, 2014 at 7:42 pm

      if smoking should be banned then so should alcohol, fast food, junk food, meat that’s been raised with hormones and antibiotics, candy, soda, and on and on. Stop using the excuse we our saving the children. if you want to save our children, teach them about self respect, manners, personal responsibility. Respecting others. As a society we blame everyone else for our mistakes and we don’t teach our children about being respectful, responsible citizens. Parents today are so wrapped up in them self they forgot when you decided to have a child, you agreed to put them first in life for at least eighteen years. So grow up and stop putting your beliefs on everyone else. Go home take a look around and ask your self what have you done to help make the world a better place. Banning legal products isn’t the way to do it.

    • CHL
      November 19, 2014 at 4:35 pm

      This is a joke, right? If not? I’ll make my OWN decisions, thank you very much… I don’t need “Big Daddy” (i.e. the GOVERNMENT) or YOU, for that matter, telling me what I can and cannot do. As long as I’m not hurting anyone else, my own behavior is just that – MINE. And it’s my own business, no one else’s. Our forefathers did NOT found this country on the ideals that government should run everything – in fact? Just the opposite is true… As it is, the government fails at the little they do try to run… I certainly do not need them to come into my home and tell me what i am “allowed” to do, what i can and cannot feed my children, whether they need a slap on the behind or not, etc., etc., etc… Get a grip, and live your OWN life, and leave mine alone…..

  • Mike T
    November 15, 2014 at 1:43 pm

    Vincent’s Country store makes a profit pedaling not just lung cancer, but diabetes, heart disease, obesity, sclerosis of the liver and gambling. Jesus made a name for himself knocking the tables over in a place like Vincent’s Country Store. Have you considered selling Porn DVDs or opening a pharmacy to sell prescription pain killers, as these are also very profitable? I guess if it’s legal to make money off the suffering and addictions of your neighbors then do it, it’s a free country, right? God bless America. And just think, you could buy yourself some more real estate, another jet ski, anything your heart desires, who cares how you get the money.

    • Confused
      November 15, 2014 at 7:28 pm

      So please let me understand, a store is not allowed to sell legal items because some people abuse it? This is what’s wrong with people. Everyone is responsible for their own decisions. As a parents it is MY job to teach my children why the shouldn’t , not Westminster BOH. Every person makes a decision on what to eat,drink,smoke or use. Stores like CVS have stopped selling tobacco products, that is their right. No one should be able to ban a business from selling items that are legal because they disagree. Period. I hope my children would never smoke, but as long as it’s legal, then they might. As a parent all I can do is explain the dangers and the reason why they shouldn’t. If you are really trying to save our children then go change the laws. Don’t hurt a business over your beliefs. If you want to cross that line, then ban EVERYTHING that can harm our kids. That should keep you busy for the next hundred years.

  • steve
    November 15, 2014 at 10:33 am

    The guy that wrote this article wins the fucking Internet for today.

  • Valerie Rosevear
    November 15, 2014 at 8:43 am

    Either smoking is legal or it is not. This issue needs to be addressed nation-wide. And, if it sooooo bad, why has marijuana become legal, surely more harmful effects from that!

    • Ed
      November 15, 2014 at 2:44 pm

      Saying pot is more harmful that cigarettes shows a special kind of stupid.

    • John Snow
      November 16, 2014 at 6:30 pm

      You are part of the problem if you think marijuana is more harmful than cigarettes learn your facts because your information is incorrect

    • Kathy
      November 16, 2014 at 8:47 pm

      Medically speaking marijuana is actually much more healthy and does not cause any fatal illnesses. There is starting to be some small proof that it may be habit forming. I was at the meeting Andrea Cretin incited the crowd on purpose. She wanted an excuse to close it so that business owners could not plead their case.The man in red wasn’t too fired up until after she closed the meeting.

    • casslipoff
      November 19, 2014 at 4:19 pm

      NO! This issue does NOT need to be addressed “nation-wide.” What needs to be addressed “nation-wide?” Is the issue of when, and who has given ANYONE the carte-blanche authority to decide what is “best” for us? Since when have we become a nation of children and idiots, who have no clue how to run our own lives, and make our own decisions,
      so that we need the GOVERNMENT (our “daddy”) to tell us how to do that? Enough is enough already, people. Wake up and smell the coffee!!! This is simply the FIRST step into removing many more civil liberties/rights to come – that we have taken for granted for far too long. Just wait and see… If someone doesn’t stand up soon and put an end to this nonsense? This is only the beginning……..

  • Valerie Rosevear
    November 15, 2014 at 8:40 am

    Love the article.

  • george hiniker
    November 15, 2014 at 7:26 am

    I don’t understand her thinking. If she is correct then she shouldn’t worry about a ban. When somebody runs out of cigarettes she thinks they will be too lazy to drive 2 minutes to Gardner to buy them. That they will quit because they are now out and will never buy another cigarette. If she doesn’t think that then she is crazy because she is sending people out of town to shop. Either way she is nuts. When has a town banned a perfectly legal item in this country before? It may have happened but I don’t know when.

    • andy
      November 15, 2014 at 3:25 pm

      There are many dry towns (alcohol sales prohibited) across the country, so unfortunately there is a precedent for this type of foolishness.

  • membernumber13
    November 15, 2014 at 1:36 am

    Children, schmildren. This is the same type of woman who bitches about strawberry flavored cigars “targeting children” but is a-okay with fruit punch flavored nicorette gum. SAVE OUR CHILDREN FROM NICORETTE!!! AND SOMETHING ABOUT JESUS!!

  • Laura
    November 15, 2014 at 1:02 am

    I am hysterically laughing at this article. I am a resident, this article is SO SPOT ON…that I must print it and share it with those not on FB in town. My husband and I were at the meeting. FYI Pete Munro the OTHER BOH Andrea’s step father….there is more to the story here folks…something smells in Westminster, and its not cigarette smoke.

    • casslipoff
      November 19, 2014 at 3:58 pm

      see? I was just going to ask if “andrea” was VOTED into her position; or if by some fluke of nepotism somebody handed her the job of removing just another one of our civil rights… how PATHETIC is this, really?

  • Alivia
    November 15, 2014 at 12:00 am

    so confused as to where you got Tim Caputo’s PK without any supers…

  • Freedom
    November 14, 2014 at 11:22 pm

    Will someone please put some more fluoride in her drinking water please?

  • Joe
    November 14, 2014 at 8:18 pm

    I believe that guy goes by the name of David and he walked there from the VFW. I’m afraid I’ve already said too much.

  • Woodiculous
    November 14, 2014 at 7:20 pm

    You are not allowed to have a contrary opinion, turtle! Think of the children!

    Seriously, this wing nut woman is hell bent on spending every last dollar of someone ELSE’S business to express her own opinion. There should be a direct tax on her that gets transferred to the local businesses that she harms.

    I wonder if she’d protest at the hearing for THAT law?

  • JJ
    November 14, 2014 at 6:03 pm

    I think there are 5 stores I can think of in Westminster that sell butts. Maybe she has a personal vendetta against one of them. Most people will have no problem driving 2 minutes down the road to Gardner. This is a quick way to vacate the center of town of all commercial property. That should work well for the town budget.

  • TurtleEgg
    November 14, 2014 at 5:08 pm

    She should move to North Korea

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