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So the other day we wrote about what a dumb idea it was for Westminster MA to try to ban the sale of cigarettes in their town. Obviously this would accomplish absolutely nothing. Obviously kids can’t purchase cigarettes legally anyway. Obviously people will still go into Fitchburg, Leominster, or any other sort of pagan cesspool of heathens to purchase their cancer sticks. Obviously.
Not surprisingly I’m not the only one who feels this way. Westminster had a town meeting conducted by their Board of Health, and it was abruptly ended by Andrea Crete, one of the three board members, when it turned into a rowdy-down!!
Sure, the residents of Westminster could’ve been a little more patient and respectful and they might’ve had their grievances heard. But this was way, way, more awesome. Singing “God Bless America”, having drunken townsfolk dragged out of an elementary school gymnasium by police, and watching some idiot from the Board of Health run away in fear because she doesn’t know how to run a meeting. This is EXACTLY what the founding fathers had in mind in their grand vision for America. I haven’t felt this patriotically aroused since I watch Bill Pullman save the planet in Independence Day.
First I wanna say that this lady right here –
sucks at life. This is what she had to say about the cigarette prohibition:
“We’re trying to save lives and prevent children from being future users.”
Newsflash – you’re not saving anyone’s life. You don’t matter that much. You’re just not that important. All you’re doing is inconveniencing people who wanna do the daily trip to Cumby’s for a pack of Marlboro Lights and thirty quick picks. Seriously though, get out of my face with all this “We’re saving the children” jive. You have to be a special kind of dumbass to think that kids from Westminster aren’t gonna smoke anymore because Andrea the Giant Dooshnozzle from the Westminster Board of Health is banning cigarettes. Like we said the other day, you’re just encouraging kids from Westminster to spend more time in Fitchburg now, and that’s NEVER a good idea for anyone. (JK, I love you Fitchburg.)
Anyway, the star of the show was this mother fucker right here:
I don’t know this guy’s name, and I can only assume he’s the local town drunk, but I fucking love this guy more than life itself. God bless you angry freedom lover, whoever you are. This angry bearded Irishman didn’t wanna hear your weak sauce Andrea Crete. Get the fuck out of his face!! You think he’s driving all the way to Leominster to buy a pack of smokes? Fuck no. You obviously underestimated how much these Patriots love FREEDOM!!!
I mean, if I’m starting a revolution tomorrow this is the first guy I’m getting. If this isn’t the face of someone who loves America and isn’t afraid to die for the stars and stripes
then I don’t know what is.
Him and his buddies didn’t come to that meeting to hear Andrea Crete blabber on about saving the children
they came to defend America from terrorists like the Westminster Board of Health. And they weren’t taking no for an answer. Show me someone who loves America more than this guy –
The bottom line is that Andrea Crete is a giant fraud. There’s a million different ways she could’ve handled this. Don’t like this freedom loving jingomaniac causing this disruption? Fine, kick his ass out. But there were clearly hundreds of other normal people there whose lives are going to be adversely affected by this. And she didn’t give them a chance to voice their opinions because having people disagree with her hurts her delicate sensibilities. Plus, it looks a lot more bad ass when you have to have a police escort from a town meeting:
Hey Andrea, here’s a thought. If you don’t want to be forced out of an elementary gymnasium with a police escort, then try to learn how to actually run a meeting. You’re doing something pretty controversial – something not one city or town in the entire country has ever done before. You don’t get smiles, rainbows, and stickers when you do that. If you really, truly believe in what you’re doing then at least have the decency to stand up and face the music.
Feel free to share your thoughts to keep the conversation going.
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