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Colrain Man Who Drove Drunk On Rims, Passed Out In Car, Is So Colrain It Hurts

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Remember when we did the blog on the 21 cities and towns in Massachusetts that are bigger dumps than WorcesterWell a town called Colrain, that odds are you’ve never been to because it’s just to the north of East Bumfuck, made #12 on our list. A lot of people were like, “Turtleboy, Lynn and New Bedford are way worse than Colrain.” LOL. Not they’re not. Colrain is a dump:

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Don’t get me wrong, Lynn and New Bedford are gigantic dumps. But at least they have stores, police departments, and an ocean. That’s why I don’t understand the appeal of these rural dump towns. If you’re gonna be poor, it might as well be in Holyoke so at least there’s a store down the street. What’s the point of living in a run down shack in the middle of nowhere?

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Well just to show you the type of clientele you’re getting in Franklin County, here’s a story about one of Colrain’s finest:

A Colrain man faces drunken driving charges after allegedly driving home after drinking at a friend’s house on two bare rims Sunday night.

Shawn Herzig, 27, was arrested and charged with driving under the influence of alcohol and driving with an open alcohol container around 10:45 p.m., according to court records.

Trooper Matthew Biron of the Shelburne state police wrote that he received reports of a vehicle off the road on Greenfield Road with flat tires and its hazard lights on. Biron followed marks on the roadway consistent with a vehicle being driven on its rims, until he found the car, with Herzig slumped over inside, at Herzig’s residence on Christian Hill Road.

The vehicle’s right front and rear passenger-side tires were completely missing, he wrote. Herzig did not respond when Biron attempted to speak with him, prompting him to call for an ambulance, but Herzig later woke up. Biron noticed Herzig had bloodshot eyes and detected a strong odor of alcohol on his breath, according to the report.

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When asked how much he had to drink, Biron wrote that Herzig said it did not matter because he was on his own private property and asserted that he could not be arrested. Biron asked him to come to the street to perform field sobriety tests, but Herzig refused out of concern that it would incriminate him, he wrote.

Biron wrote Herzig continued to resist as he was placed under arrest — at one point refusing to comply unless he was given a cigarette when a second officer arrived — and threatened him in various ways while being transported to the station. There, he refused to sign consent and Miranda warning forms and refused a breath test, Biron wrote. Continuing to maintain that he could not be charged, he was released on personal recognizance.

Biron wrote that he found an open bottle of Fireball brand whiskey on the front seat of Herzig’s car when he searched the vehicle.

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Shawn Herzig is so Colrain it hurts. Mohawk Valley’s finest. How’d you like to be a State Trooper out of the Shelburne barracks? You signed up to be cop so you could arrest bad guys, and all you’re doing is dealing with brain surgeons like this in such easily accessible places as Rowe, Heath, and Hawley. Franklin County is basically Appalachia. It’s the most PC liberal part of our stat, but yet at the same time it’s got these pockets of trailer trash who pound Bud Heavy’s, drive around on their rims, pass out in their driveways, and then lecture the police about their limited understanding of the Constitution.

Maybe Worcester isn’t so bad.

 

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29 Comment(s)
  • Kate
    January 3, 2016 at 10:34 am

    Hi,
    I normally just stay away from this type of gossip and slanderous stuff but I thought that since I’m from Colrain I should stick up for the town a bit. I won’t deny that the center of town has become a bit “dumpy”. I wish you could have seen it about 10-15 years ago. With that being said, I wish you had published a bit more of the town besides just the center. I grew up on one of the remaining farms in the town and they are the heart of the town. Did you go up to the hills and see some of the most spectacular views the town has to offer or the food we provide? Colrain is no hot spot but it is beautiful and has a lot to offer. And hey it could be way worse, it could be full of heroin or other heinous things like the “hot spot” cities are. :/ Just sayin’

  • Dennis Clark
    January 1, 2016 at 1:26 am

    If that’s how people feel about us, than stay out of or community. This article is far from accurate, but I’d rather hear this than hear people coming in here and trying to gentrify our community. In the past ten years, it’s gotten to the point where I don’t know who my neighbors are. Property values are being driven up by folks moving in here who do not participate in the community, do not do business locally, do not work locally (or work at all in many cases). People who grew up here can’t even afford to live here. The idea that Franklin County is comparably hickish as Appalachia is ignorant. I question whether or not your first hand knowledge actually qualifies you to make that comparison. There IS a close-knit sense of community. In that way, yes, it could be compared in the way you’re trying. Are we generally poor? I guess. I don’t know too many people that don’t have everything that they really need though. Why don’t we just live in Holyoke? Because we don’t want to live where the streets are covered with heroin needles and your neighbors live right on top of you. Most of us live in beautiful New England style single family homes that people like the writer of this article are flocking to buy without having the decency to join in and embrace the community. If you don’t like our way of life; if you don’t want to take part and try to have a positive impact on some of the problems that EVERY community has; if all you have to do is criticize, STAY OUT. On an other note, I challenge you to pass out I.Q. tests in Boston and tell me that the people there are a different breed than us.

  • December 31, 2015 at 6:41 pm

    Damn, Turtleboy really pissed these Cousin fuckers off lol. Im surprised they even know how to use the Interweb machine

    • Herzig
      December 31, 2015 at 7:43 pm

      Just because we are from the sticks doesn’t mean we can’t show you all a thing or two

      • December 31, 2015 at 9:07 pm

        Yeah probably how to fuck sheep on the edge of a cliff so they push back lol

        • Tracy
          December 31, 2015 at 10:41 pm

          I think the smog that you inhale daily is affecting your judgement. That whole fucking sheep thing is so old it’s ridiculous. The city usually has the pedophile or crack head in every other house. People in the “sticks” usually just enjoy a few beers and smoking Pot. In the city you can be shot at just walking down the street.

          • TargetPractice
            January 2, 2016 at 12:50 am

            Oh, so no more sheep? what do you guys fuck now? goats?

          • Tracy
            January 3, 2016 at 12:32 am

            Nope not goats either. But our country boys could have your little Bitch if they wanted. Or your sister.

          • Josh
            January 2, 2016 at 2:34 pm

            Your bitch. When you have a pick up that can run with us you try boys come play…

  • Kye johnson
    December 31, 2015 at 3:47 pm

    Fuck all of you who are talking shot about my hometown colrain is a beautiful place go up on Catamount and look around there’s plenty of places in colrain that are beautiful and besides the blue block building isn’t even there anymore I love my town more then anything and if yall wanna keep talking shit come find me you fucking poon burgers

    • Zac
      December 31, 2015 at 4:33 pm

      The blue block is still there Kye. Most of the buildings that need major work will not see it till the sewage treatment plant goes in. its not like most of the other town where the houses have the ability but no one wants them. as soon as the houses in town are worth the investment people will jump on them. Colrain is not running down, it’s being built up and its just a matter of the state funding the projects before those houses are remodeled.

  • Daniel Herzig
    December 31, 2015 at 2:51 pm

    Hi everyone. .. I’m that so called morons brother. Yes he fucked up everyone does but in his defense he was in the driveway that I live at and where he lives … no where in the police report does it say they towed his car.. I called the police barracks.. nowhere in the police report says the car was towed… thought that was nesasary. They said they towed it do to the fact his registration didn’t make the adress they towed it off private property witch there was no need the car wasn’t impounded nor was it confiscated for police evidence. That was simply them being dick heads. If u saw this house I can almost say I’m 100% positive its a better then the dips hit that wrote this

  • Zac
    December 31, 2015 at 12:49 am

    You have a picture showing that it’s the biggest town in Western Ma. and you can only come up with a couple shitty picture? You must be a fucktard if you have time to right a shitty story about a beautiful town. Yah maybe there’s 12 druggies and less so for run down houses in town, but living there is a privilidge. 4 shitty pictures LOL. And what about Pine Hill Orchard’s? Then there’s Catamount Convenience that is currently being remodeled. It’s safe to say your articles are fabricated to your ignorance and I’ll think twice about them from now on.

  • Robert Blake
    December 30, 2015 at 11:03 pm

    The Herzig name is one you’ll see a lot in that tiwn,and the comment about Appalachia is a bit true because almost everyone is related…..

  • WIll Andrew
    December 30, 2015 at 8:08 pm

    Seriously? A long time ago i used to hang out at my uncles house which is that bluish kinda building i one of the above pics of the town center. Yes it is a town in the middle of nowhere but not all houses look like that in colrain. how can you take a piic or two of a few houses that are screwed up and claim that to be the entire town. yup there might be a dumbass or two living there but lets get real worcester, lynn are filled with drug addicts, gangs and far worse scum than you’ll find in Colrain. just go to Orange,Athol Evring, warwick and you’ll find dumps as bad or worse than these pics show.

  • WIll Andrew
    December 30, 2015 at 8:08 pm

    Seriously? A long time ago i used to hang out at my uncles house which is that bluish kinda building i one of the above pics of the town center. Yes it is a town in the middle of nowhere but not all houses look like that in colrain. how can you take a piic or two of a few houses that are screwed up and claim that to be the entire town. yup there might be a dumbass or two living there but lets get real worcester, lynn are filled with drug addicts, gangs and far worse scum than you’ll find in Colrain. just go to Orange,Athol Evring, warwick and you’ll find dumps as bad or worse than these pics show.

  • Leland herrett
    December 30, 2015 at 7:40 pm

    Thats my fathers house with the camper next to it and whats wrong with that its a really nice house and judging books by there cover is stupid do more research before you bash people and there things

  • WormtownorBust
    December 30, 2015 at 6:16 pm

    Nice bass.

  • Becky R
    December 30, 2015 at 5:25 pm

    You managed to take pictures of the two most run down houses in Colrain to justify your idiocy. Every town has a moron…should we slam your town because you live there? Colrain has a police and fire station and last I knew a gas station that had groceries. Many of my friends and family that live there have awesome jobs and are college educated. Your story is ill un informed and inflammatory for no other reason then to make yourself feel good. We call that bullying in my town.

    • WIll Andrew
      December 30, 2015 at 8:12 pm

      I myself couldnt believe what im reading. it offensive

  • Jolene
    December 30, 2015 at 5:01 pm

    This story is so ignorant that it hurts. I grew up in these small hill towns and they are some of the most beautiful places in the world. Sorry I would rather be poor and own 4 acres than be poor and live in Holyoke. These people live off the land, that the beauty of living in the country. You don’t need a store when you can go and pick fresh vegetables from your backyard garden. The auther of this artical is so stupid that it hurts.

    • WIll Andrew
      December 30, 2015 at 8:10 pm

      I agree with you

    • Cherrie
      December 31, 2015 at 3:59 pm

      I agree! I lived in Col rain for 8 years. Beautiful people and many beautiful homes. There are idiots and poor people with trashy homes in every town!

    • christina
      December 31, 2015 at 5:49 pm

      I couldn’t have said that better myself. This makes me want to puke. I love my town of colrain, our far from dumpy house, our awesome neighbors and friendly townies. We are far from a dump, the idiot took pictures of the only 4 shitty houses in colrain. What a wack job.

    • Tracy
      December 31, 2015 at 10:34 pm

      I agree. The townsfolk in Colrain have lot’s of fun in the wilderness. I spent a Saturday there and had a blast riding a dirt bike around on a trail in the woods and then shooting a pellet gun at a target. It was FUN! And then we walked down to the river so the dogs could swim. Much better than Holyoke!!!

  • Wabbitt
    wabbitt
    December 30, 2015 at 4:33 pm

    He nay be a drunken hillbilly, but he has good taste in cartoons. I spy some Justice League Unlimited on his tv in the second picture.

  • Pam from Tatnuck
    December 30, 2015 at 3:16 pm

    This story is so funny that I’m dying just reading it……AWESOME!!!!!

  • Purple Passion
    December 30, 2015 at 2:31 pm

    That must be Paul Moosey’s drink of choice-Fireball Whiskey, aged 12 minutes in a steel vat.

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